Doomed to Remember
by TheCatWithTheHat
Summary: Collaboration with moonlightrurouni. When a world of light is opened up to you, it's an instinct to hold onto the cause. But when the meaning behind your world is ripped away, you're left lost, confused and doomed to remember... Ulquiorra POV
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I must be suicidal. I swore to myself that I wouldn't publish another story until I finished my other ones, but you all know my willpower. Or lack of it.**

**It must be known that this is a collaboration with moonlightrurouni. So when you finish here you have to go read her story, which is titled "Cursed to Forget." Or maybe you're coming here from hers. The general idea is that it's one story, and she's writing Orihime's perspective while I write Ulquiorra.**

**Okay, so...Standard Issue Disclaimer: And I'm only going to say this once, guys. No one reads this junk anyways. I could be talking about Bacon up in here and no one would ever know. But, for the lawyer's sake, I don't own Bleach. Unless you count 39 volumes of manga and a character book. What? Why are you looking at me funny?**

It was her cheeks, he decided; definitely her cheeks. They were so soft, so smooth; they were always flushed so beautifully whenever she looked at him. Under his cold fingers, they were so warm; but as he slid his ivory hands up toward her eyes, and back down towards her hair, he changed his mind. No, it was not her cheeks; it was her hair. Fanning out behind her head, it was thick, luxurious, intoxicating. He ran his fingers between the strands, passing easily through the silky mass. Sliding his hands down, resting them on the small of her back, he changed his mind again; it was her eyes, definitely her eyes. Closed now, he could vividly see her sparkling gray orbs behind his own green eyes - open and gazing at him, or darting away when she opened her mouth in some loving admission, or even hidden behind delicate, purplish lids, fluttering when her lips touched his. And that brought his mind back to what he was now sure was her best feature: her lips. Pink, plump, smooth as a baby's bottom, they were usually stretched into a smile as wide as the ocean and as happy as an innocent puppy. His favorite place for them to be, however, was locked solidly against his own, as they were now.

Hot tongues battled within her wet mouth; he won over and began to explore the cavern he found himself inside. His hands roamed restlessly over her back, up and down from her shoulder blades over her hips. Her fingers scratched at his chest through his shirt, making his gut tingle in a way that made him angle his head even closer to her. He clutched her body even closer to his, sandwiching himself between her magnificent chest and the white couch she slept on, a shiver running over him. Their legs twined together, and every so often one of hers would give a little kick. She moaned, her voice low, into his mouth, and suddenly there was too much fabric and he wanted it gone and he'd rip it from her skin if he had to, didn't matter if they were on the uncomfortable old couch in her room, nothing would get between him and his Orihime -

A knock sounded at the door, abrupt and precise; he opened green eyes to meet her gray ones, the eyes he had been worshiping so completely earlier, the sparkle now one of alarm instead of love. Her hair - her glorious autumn-colored hair! - hung down from her scalp, creating a curtain between them and the outside world. He gazed up at her, taking in her face, her flush cheeks, her red and swollen lips before he remembered the knock at the door and slowly pushed himself up, letting her draw away from his chest. Giving her one last, deep and lingering kiss, he stood, collected his pastel-handled blade and turned to her one last time.

"I shall return in a moment," he promised, buckling the sword distractedly to his belt. The last thing he wanted was to leave her glorious embrace and face whatever the being at the door was bringing, but he had no choice. She smiled slightly and tucked her flaming hair behind her ear, aiming her gaze downward and hunching her back in a chaste way that made him want to pin her back down and make her his, messenger be damned. Swallowing those thoughts, he turned back away from her before his once-iron willpower crumbled like the sand it had become.

"Bye, Ulquiorra," she said softly, and he clenched his jaw to resist her succulent voice before forcing a hand to the door handle and slipping out of her door, letting it shut behind him.

Outside was one of Aizen-sama's Números, the nameless Arrancar that wandered the hallways of Las Noches, carrying out errands for anyone who was higher ranked then themselves in return for keeping their worthless lives. _Trash,_ Ulquiorra thought, still irritated by the interruption.

"Aizen-sama requests your presence, sir," the Número murmured, its gaze trained on the cold stone floor. Ulquiorra brushed wordlessly past it, sweeping away from the woman's room.

Their romance had not started off as such. Sure, when he had first seen her, he had felt a mild attraction, although at the time he had no idea what the stirring in his gut, the slight burn around his hollow hole was, so he decided to ignore it. But when he noticed that it became worse around the woman, he had decided to act upon his instincts. The woman - Orihime - had probably been surprised at first, given his previous cold demeanor towards her, but then she had warmed up to his passionate first kiss. And one thing lead to another; a week later, they were found on the couch, in the position he had previously described.

He could not explain the feeling that made his chest constrict when he laid his eyes upon her form. It was a tightening in his torso, a pounding in his head; it was a sensation that made his ears ring and his abdomen tingle, a sensation that made his knees weak and his fingers tremble. It made him want to run to her graceful form, fold her willowy frame within his embrace, clutch her tightly against his muscular chest and never let go. It made him want to grasp her soft, feminine jaw, made him want to tilt up her glowing face with slight pressure applied with his thumbs, made him want to press his black and white lips to her pink ones. Made him want to see her laugh and dance, made him want to wipe away her tears. It scared him, and the only thing that dissolved his worry was when he was able to do these things, to press her into his arms and kiss away her sorrow. To tell her that everything would be okay.

One roadblock remained in their relationship, and that was Aizen-sama. It was clear to Ulquiorra that he did not want his fourth Espada and his prisoner engaging in any type of romantic act. If the man found out about it...Ulquiorra held back a shudder.

Arriving at the throne room, Ulquiorra pushed all the thoughts of Orihime from his mind, wanting to get done with this meeting and return to his newfound goddess. But when he entered the throne room of Aizen-sama, the foreboding in the air was so thick, it was like Nnoitra's hierro skin. Uncertainly, Ulquiorra allowed the door to swing closed behind him and stood just in the entryway, sinking into a low bow in the direction of his master, although the latter's back was turned.

"You called, Aizen-sama?"

Slowly, slowly, the man allowed his chair to rotate around to face his fourth knight. As usual, his hand was propping his jaw up; his elbow was resting on the arm of the chair. A small smile graced his features.

Today, the smile had a frosty edge that Ulquiorra did not like.

"Ah, my dear Ulquiorra," Aizen-sama said. His voice was too placid, too difficult to read. Unease made Ulquiorra's throat drop down into his stomach with a painful, audible splash. "I wish to discuss something of the utmost importance with you today. Please, come closer." Aizen-sama gestured for the monotonous Arrancar to stand by his side, and with legs suddenly feeling like jelly, Ulquiorra did so.

"What is it that you wish to share with me, my lord?" Ulquiorra inquired, his voice low and steady.

Aizen did not even blink as his smile stretched fractionally wider. "Our prisoner, the gentle Inoue Orihime."

Ulquiorra kept his face blank and neutral, knowing that his master was gauging a reaction from his stoic servant. "She is healthy, eating well, and ready to serve you whenever my lord wishes," he reported, and fell silent.

"And she is happy?" Aizen-sama asked, no change in his expression.

"I would not know, my lord." Ulquiorra kept his eyes steadily locked on Aizen-sama without wavering. "I myself am inexperienced in these areas."

"She does not tell you of her emotions?" Aizen-sama asked carefully.

"No, my lord."

Aizen-sama seemed to lean forward a bit. His hand lifted from its place in his lap, and he gestured for Ulquiorra to come a little closer. Slightly surprised, Ulquiorra leaned toward his master, bending a little at the waist to lower his head to the level of the brunette sitting calmly in the chair. Aizen-sama propelled himself a little off of the cushions, lifting his hand and placing it on Ulquiorra's cheek. Eyes widening marginally in shock, Ulquiorra fought to hold still as Aizen-sama lifted his lips to Ulquiorra's ear and breathed a sentence against the ice-cold ivory skin.

"_You are lying to me."_

Ulquiorra's eyes widened impossibly, showing white all around his emerald irises. His body jerked back as if shocked, and his heart was pounding.

They were caught. It was definitely over. Aizen-sama would kill him and Inoue both. They were as good as dead now. For some reason Ulquiorra felt something burbling up in his chest that he had never felt before, something that made his pale forehead break out in sweat. He stumbled a step away from his master, who kept the small, amused grin plastered to his face. The feeling rose in Ulquiorra's chest and enveloped his mind. It was another feeling that seemed to have come with his new love for the girl.

The feeling was what he believed humans called _panic._

"You see, Ulquiorra," said Aizen-sama pleasantly, "I had a slight feeling there was something amiss. Your reports of the girl have been too vague. Your attention is constantly elsewhere, despite the fact that you are always the most attentive at meetings – or should I say, you _were_ always the most attentive at meetings. So yesterday, when you took the girl out for her exercise, I had a camera installed in her room."

A feeling of uncomprehending horror bared its ugly head inside Ulquiorra, side by side with its equally ugly brother, Panic.

"And what do you think I saw?" Aizen-sama said. "Well, when you went to feed the girl, I summoned all my Espada to me. And we watched what happened when you went to bring the girl her food. Yes, she ate all right. She ate food, as well as something else. Let's see, what was it that Nnoitra said…?" He pretended to think. "Ah yes, your face. So, Ulquiorra, what it boils down to is…you have disobeyed my orders."

Humiliation battled with Panic and Uncomprehending Horror inside of Ulquiorra. In the end they declared a truce and stood proudly side by side, baring their ugly chests to the world. Each equally strong, each equally powerful.

Ulquiorra bowed his head. "Forgive me, Aizen-sama. I have no excuses. I am prepared to accept whatever punishment you see fit to bestow upon me."

He didn't dare look up when Aizen-sama started speaking.

"Ah, yes, Ulquiorra. You see, that's the funny thing about my punishments. You say you are prepared to accept whatever punishment I see fit, but then the punishment I see fit is, in fact, a punishment that you do not wish to accept at all. Take Mr. Jeagerjaques for example," here he paused, and his voice became more amused, "well, he said the same thing. But you wouldn't want to enlighten him on that particular punishment, would you? Not when I have worked so hard to make him forget…?"

Uncomprehending Horror stepped forward momentarily, and Ulquiorra raised his head. "You're going to make me forget her…?" he breathed.

Aizen-sama's smile dipped a little. "No, no," he said. "I know that what you wish is to remove your emotions once more, Ulquiorra, and if I made you forget the girl you would not complain. That would, in fact, be punishing _her._ She would be left with emotions that would not be returned, an unwanted unrequited love. And we do not want to punish our prisoner. We want to punish _you."_

The words struck Ulquiorra like physical blows. He did not, in fact, know what he would do if emotions were once again lost to him. A whole new world had opened before him, and he was curious to see what it held.

But then again, maybe Aizen-sama was right. Maybe he would turn his back on that world if given the chance.

"Forgive me, my lord, but I do not follow."

"Respectful as always, even when receiving punishment. Well, Ulquiorra, I shall spell it out for you. We are going to make _her_ forget _you._ She shall be transferred into the care of one of the other Espada. And you will be left with your feelings and shall never see her face again."

With swift, fatal blows, Uncomprehending Horror got Panic and Humiliation into chokeholds and killed them swiftly and without even a chance to make a strangled last cry. The remaining emotion rose behind Ulquiorra's eyes as he stared at his master.

"No…"

"Would you like to know whose care she shall be bestowed into?"

Ulquiorra couldn't even speak. His whole body was numb.

"Her health and care is now in the hands of the Segunda Espada, Barragan Luisenbarn, and his multitude of Fracciónes. He has five or six. I can never remember, can you?" Aizen-sama said conversationally. "Let's see. There's Ggio, Charlotte, Findorr…"

"Please," Ulquiorra said. His voice came out as little more than a croak. The words slipped from his mouth uncontrollably, words that his lips and tongue had never formed before. "Please. Anything but that."

"That's what they all say," Aizen-sama said pleasantly. "Now, if you'll excuse me, Ulquiorra. In order for this punishment to work, our newest Arrancar needs to be able to see your face. So we need you to be asleep. We can't have you get the satisfaction of saying goodbye to the sweet Orihime, now can we? Now, Ulquiorra…nighty-night."

Before Ulquiorra could ask who the newest Arrancar was, or beg his master some more to reconsider, he felt Aizen-sama turn his Spiritual Pressure all the way up. Ulquiorra's green eyes rolled back into his head from the physical pressure of it, of his master's power, and he slumped to the ground.

The last thing he saw was a feminine shoe before him, a pale wisp of a girl with a white circlet.

Then the darkness from Aizen-sama's power pulled him under.

**My fluff skills :'D They have come so far ... Yay**

**Okay, so head on over to moonlightrurouni's, which is called "Cursed to Forget." And remember, reviews are dearly loved!**

**See you guys later!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2 is out guys and looks to me like we'll be updating every second Wednesday, according to moony. You know me, usually I just update whenever I feel like it, but I suppose that schedules are comforting for some people and so we'll do what she said.**

**On a humorous note, we were in sex ed. and there was a question box in which we could put questions we had but were too embarrassed to ask. Usually we just put in really, really stupid stuff for fun. Me and my friend decided to put in the best question ever but we didn't think our teacher would read it out loud (he goes over the questions the night before) but to our delight he unfolded the paper and said "And now for my personal favorite... 'What if I have a sexual attraction to Bacon?'" We all **_**died**_** laughing, tears were literally streaming out of my eyes. It was so funny. And then he even answered it seriously... LOL. That's my favorite teacher..**

Ulquiorra woke up the next morning with a splitting headache and a curious sensation that his life was over.

Opening his eyes hurt, so he lay very still, remaining swathed in his blankets, his body on the side with his legs drawn up and his arms folded in front of his chest, his horn pointing skyward. Once, Grimmjow had walked in on him sleeping, and had accused Ulquiorra of sleeping like a baby, which Ulquiorra flatly denied. He always slept that way, anyways.

He wondered what time it was. The landscape outside did not reflect the time of day, so there was no light indication in the rooms as to whether it was morning, evening, or night. The Espada weren't the type to sleep in - except for the Primera, Coyote Starrk - but it felt later than usual.

His bed was very comfortable, a fact which he had not really noticed until now. Usually he went to bed when he was tired and fell asleep immediately, and when he woke, he rose quickly and prepared for the day. This was the first time he had really just laid in a bed without anything to do, except for sometime in the past week. But those times, he was always with -

His eyes flew open and then squeezed closed, and his body curled in on itself without his permission, like a gray roly-poly bug when poked. He bit his tongue as the memories of yesterday hit him like blows in the abdomen and his hollow hole seemed to be suddenly lit with flame.

So that's why he woke up feeling like his life was over.

Aizen-sama had discovered their affair, and his precious Inoue had been ripped away from him, to God-knows-where. Hard as he tried, he couldn't sense her spiritual pressure anywhere in Las Noches, almost as though it was being cloaked or concealed by something. He wouldn't be surprised if she was hidden away in the Segunda Espada's monstrous, castle-like wing; but besides his Fracción, Barragan Luisenbarn also had numerous guards posted in his overlarge suite. By the time he found Inoue, he would have no doubt been discovered by guards. And in this way, Aizen-sama would discover that Ulquiorra was sneaking around behind his back some more, and this time blood would be spilled. There was to be no more second chances. His master had made that clear – _disobey me again and I shall not be so lenient._ Whether he would be the one killed, or Inoue, he didn't know. If he could be 100% sure that he would die, he would willingly sacrifice himself to hold her in his arms once more. To see her face and know she was alright. But he didn't know, and the thought of her dying was too much to even entertain.

"Looks like you'll die a virgin, then."

Ulquiorra startled. His eyes shot open, and he bolted up in bed, displaying his bare upper chest to the visitor. It took him a second to register the figure leaning on his doorframe, but when he did, he sent Grimmjow the most death-defying glare he could muster without changing his facial expression.

"I am not decent," he said coldly, but Grimmjow laughed in his face.

"You got that right. Man, I never knew you were such a good kisser. Where'd you learn that from?"

Ulquiorra's mouth opened, but no sound emerged. That was right. Aizen-sama had invited all the Espada in to view his last precious moments with Inoue. And now everyone who was anyone knew about what had happened between him and the woman.

Grimmjow plopped onto the bed, not caring to wait for Ulquiorra's response. "So did you guys ever actually do it, or was I right?"

"Do what?" Ulquiorra inquired flatly, struggling to hide his embarrassment.

"You know. It."

"I do not know of this 'it' that you speak of."

"You know!" Grimmjow said loudly. "Did you ever actually screw her? Fuck her? Stick it in her? Did you guys have fucking sex or not?"

Ulquiorra glared coldly. "Do you really think me the type to soil a woman in that way without her consent?"

"Well, ya looked pretty close to it in the footage."

Ulquiorra bit his tongue. What he had said to Grimmjow wasn't entirely true. There were some times when he'd gotten caught up in the moment and almost made her his, but he had forcibly quelled his inner animal and backed down, tried to be content with just her lips and her hands.

"Guess you could just grope her. With a rack like that, it'd be almost the same," Grimmjow mused aloud.

That was the last straw. "I will not have you speaking of her in such a derogatory manner," Ulquiorra nearly spat. "She is so much more than just a body, than just a shell. I am surprised you've even forgotten about how to value a woman –"

He stopped then, remembering Aizen-sama's warning. Luckily, Grimmjow didn't notice.

"Ooh, touchy." The sexta got to his feet, his muscles rippling like water beneath his skin. His movements were joined together, graceful, feline. "Well, best be going now. I had a bet with Nnoitra about whether you had the balls to actually do it. Nnoitra said she was too smokin' for even you to resist, but I said, nah, he's not manly enough. Looks like it's time for me to collect."

Grimm's taunting laughter floated down the hall after him, and Ulquiorra clenched his fists in the sheets he was still entangled in. Great. His peers were already betting on his sexual advances with the woman he loved so much. He knew he would have to start mentally preparing for the days of mental torment that were sure to follow.

As if everything wasn't bad enough.

Taking a deep breath, Ulquiorra swung his bare legs out of bed and pulled on his uniform, relishing the feel of the cool white fabric against his equally white skin. How he wished he could go back to being like his uniform; unfeeling, moving only when ordered to, fulfilling only its duty and no more. But he could not go back.

Orihime Inoue had opened up this world of feeling to him, and he had thought like the naïve fool he was that she would be there to hold his hand and guide him through all of the new things he had no name for and could not control. But now she was gone. Ulquiorra knew he'd drown in these new feelings that he no longer wanted and was unfamiliar with. He likened it to buying a toy and opening the package eagerly, only to find that it was not what you wanted and unable to return it because it had already been accessed.

At least he still had Murciélago. He picked up his sword and slid it gently through his thick black belt. No matter what happened, he knew he was never alone. The spirit inside of his zanpaku-tô was always with him, through thick and thin. And his sword was one thing that would never leave him.

Pulling on his socks and sandals, he swept from the room in search of something to sate his hunger. As usual, when he walked, he kept his eyes downcast and indifferent. But he was quite adept at sensing Spiritual Pressure, so he did not need his sight to know that Nnoitra Gilga was lounging on a wall next to him, a leery grin on his face.

"Hey, Emospada. T'sup?"

Ulquiorra cursed inwardly and paused by the quinto Espada. "What do you want with me, jackal?"

Nnoitra tsked. "That's no way to say good morning. Er, I mean…" He checked an imaginary watch. "What I meant was, 'That's no way to say good _afternoon_.' I never had you pegged as a late sleeper, Ulquiorra. Maybe you were worn out from your romping yesterday." The tall man cackled delightedly. "Tell me, Ulquiorra, is she good?"

Only the second time, and already Ulquiorra was tired of innuendoes that he did not understand. "Good at what?" he said, a hint of irritation lacing his voice.

"Good in bed, of course." Nnoitra jeered.

Ulquiorra ground his teeth. "You are disgusting. I cannot even fathom why you would think that I would do something like that to a woman of her purity."

"Well, maybe 'cause we spied ya playin' tonsil hockey yesterday afternoon."

Heat crept up the back of Ulquiorra's neck, but of course his skin color did not change. "I have no further business here," he said, and swept away, desperately trying to ignore Nnoitra's delighted cackling following in his footsteps.

He traced his steps to the kitchen area. Thank God he did not see any more of his taunting Espada comrades. How long would the teasing and jeering last? he wondered. Once the jabs would have rolled off of him like water off of a feather, but now each word stabbed into his core. It was the woman's fault, he knew, but the extent of her involvement remained unclear to him. Did it simply stop at the reason that she had opened up this new world to him, had cracked his hard outer shell? Or was it because the jeers and jabs were aimed at her, although the words were spoken to him?

Were their souls so entwined that the insults tossed in her direction also hit him deep inside his own core, as if they were stripping him of what remained of his mask?

Ulquiorra shook his head and wandered into the kitchen. Meals were provided for the Espada, but they did not come often, since many of his comrades still hungered for Hollow flesh and would often venture out into the sands of Hueco Mundo for their meals. If one desired a humanesque plate for themselves more than once a week, it would be charged on them to either get it themselves of order one of the lower ranked Arrancars to make it for them.

Ulquiorra, however, was one of the rare beings with Spiritual Pressure in existence that did not feel a constant desire to eat. Occasionally, hunger rose, but it was generally only when he had experienced a trauma – a fight, bringing deep wounds, usually triggered it. He had long ago expressed the desire to collect his own vittles to Aizen-sama, and the servant bearing the tray of food once a week had stopped coming to his rooms. Since then he had willingly taken care of his own meals.

Ulquiorra took down a pan and slid in among the Arrancar cooks, who scurried away in fear at the sight of him. He waved them back to their jobs, and hesitantly, they returned to their various places around the room, shying away from his approach nonetheless. He approached a large refrigerator and extracted two eggs, which he held skillfully between his fingers.

_I feel like an omelette today…_

He returned to his pan and cracked his eggs into it, tossing the shells into the wastebasket effortlessly. He then returned to the fridge and pulled out some vegetables.

_Let's see… Tomatoes for sure, spinach, maybe a sprinkle of cheese. Green peppers, mushrooms. Ham. Onions… _He juggled the vegetables over to a cutting board, lifting a knife from the magnetic board and bringing it down swiftly on his pepper.

Slowly he became aware of the Arrancar cooks drawing nearer in curiosity as he diced his veggies all at once, with a quick, clean precision. Irritated as he finished and set down the knife, he went back over to the skillet, flipped his omelette over with one hand, and then slid his vegetable and meat mass inside. He folded over the egg creation and then drew a jar of salsa from the fridge.

_Perfect…_

He carried the skillet over to a long table in the corner of the room, snagging a fork but not bothering with a plate. Pulling out a chair with a screech, he slid into it and twisted the top off of the salsa before tilting it over his omelette and scraping some out with his fork. He spread the spicy, chunky tomato sauce over the surface of the yellow omelette and then lifted the first bite to his mouth.

He just loved these things, he thought as he closed his eyes and crunched on a green pepper.

"Ulquiorra."

He opened his eyes and paused mid-chew. Across from him, he saw Tia Halibel – the tercera Espada – pull out a chair and seat herself in it, her sea-green eyes regarding him calmly.

"Halibel," he greeted, quickly swallowing his food. He nodded in respect for the female Espada ranked just above him.

In all of Hueco Mundo, there were perhaps five individuals he respected, and at the top of this list was the woman seated across from him. Following her was Aizen-sama, Coyote Starrk, the Primera, and Inoue Orihime. He placed himself in this list as well, but did not generally think of himself that way.

It surprised him to admit that Tia Halibel held more of his respect than Sôsuke Aizen, but he had to admit it was true.

"I am sorry about what happened," she began, her low voice solemn. Ulquiorra looked up, surprise shining behind his emerald eyes, fork halfway to his mouth and lips slightly parted in preparation to take a bite.

"That surprises me somewhat," he admitted, "I confess my suspicion was that you had come to torment me alongside the others."

"Torment you?" she asked, shock lacing through her voice. "Have the others been giving you a hard time?"

Ulquiorra wished he had not spoken. "Only the ones I have chanced upon. But there is still time left in the day." He could not help but add the last bit, and again surprise overtook him when he heard the bitter tone in his voice.

Halibel leaned back in her chair, crossing her arms under her voluptuous chest. She had a figure that was as incredible as, if not more so, than Inoue's, but it did not illicit the same response from him at all. It was probably the way she so uncaringly displayed it that gave him no desire to see more.

"That is a shame," she said quietly. "Ulquiorra, I know you are still unfamiliar with human emotion, so I think I will help you out with this one. I believe that the other Espada are somewhat jealous of you."

Ulquiorra hastily chewed and swallowed his bite. "Please explain further."

"I think the other men around you, who claim the females in Hueco Mundo as easily as trying on a new pair of shoes, are jealous of the way that yourself and Inoue shared something special between yourselves that was not only physical, but deeply emotional as well."

Ulquiorra thought back to Nnoitra's leery eyes and creepy grin. "If that is true, it would come as a surprise to me."

"Then I think you are in for a surprise," she said gently. "I admit, I myself am slightly jealous at the way your love changed you."

Ulquiorra chewed silently, but his eyes requested more. She seemed to sigh, although her collar hid her face.

"When I first arrived here in Hueco Mundo, it was in the footsteps of Neliel, and a nobler woman I have never heard tell of in my entire existence." Halibel's gloved finger traced a circle on the table. "She was not the type of woman who would display her body in a degrading way such as I do, and yes, I admit I do this." She rested her chin in her hands. "Neliel's way of dress and attitude led her to find love, and although her romance was her downfall, she still managed to attain what I failed to grasp. I think it is too late for me now, but…" She looked at him though her ragged blond bangs, and her eyes seemed to crinkle as if she was smiling. "It gives me hope to see someone like yourself blossom in such a way as you have since the arrival of Inoue Orihime."

Ulquiorra laid down his fork and laced his fingers together, resting his chin on his hands. "Inoue Orihime opened my eyes to a new world," he said quietly. "I used to believe that my eyes saw all things, but now I know that it was not the case. My eyes had never seen beauty or happiness or joy. All they saw was pain and suffering and heartbreak." He closed his eyes. "Inoue showed me love and compassion, and every feeling – good and bad – that came with them." He swallowed. "Now she is gone, and I do not know what to do with these feelings."

They sat in silence for a moment, until Ulquiorra opened his eyes. He saw Halibel's eyes widen with surprise, as he let all the pain he was feeling twist his features into a heart-wrenching mask.

"Do you know what I can do?" he whispered, his voice broken.

She simply looked at him, and her eyes shone with compassion for the pale man seated before her.

"You should write down what you feel," she said. "Write the girl letters, and you can give them to her when you see her again."

"I don't know when that will be," he confessed, "I fear she will be killed if I attempt to see her and Aizen-sama became aware of it."

"I will give her your letters," Halibel said. "Or I will give them to one of Lord Barragan's Fracción. If that is what you desire, I would be honored to assist you."

Ulquiorra closed his eyes and nodded deeply before the powerful woman. She smiled, reached for his hair, and ruffled it before she stood and left, leaving him with half an omelette and a spark of hope in his chest.

* * *

Back in his room, Ulquiorra hesitantly sat at his desk. By some miracle, he had not crossed any of the others on his way back, and had firmly closed and locked his door before turning to the piece of furniture in the corner of the room. Aizen-sama had provided him with a pad of paper embellished with his name and rank on the top margin, as well as a pen that was similarly engraved.

He put his pen to the paper and began to write, noting the dark green ink that flowed from the tip, forming elegant letters on the thick stationery.

_My sweet Orihime…_

**So yeah. Don't forget to read and review moonlightrurouni's, **_**Cursed to Forget**_** and see you soon!**

**Ulquiorra: Review please, it makes her nicer..**

**Me: Hush you. -whacks and then quickly dodges Cero- No lasers in the house please! Remember what Mom said last time you did that, Ulquiorra!**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: So we're counting down days of school. I'm a grad this year, not telling you what I'm graduating from, but that means it's extra-chaotic for me with writing speeches and sitting through the girls in my class discussing what they're wearing to our party afterwards. –groan- After that, I get to drive 14-15 hours in the car between my younger sister and my hyperactive cousin, both of whom are in middle school and crazy hyperactive. Ulquiorra, I'm sorry, but I think we'll have to tie you to the top…**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach, jeez. Or else Ulquihime would **_**totally**_** be canon. Sorry, Jordan.**

_My sweet Orihime,_

_I do not know where to begin. The multitude of what I have to say to you would wear out this pen from ink and I would still have more to say. _

_Firstly, Tia Halibel suggested that I write you. She approached me whilst I was eating the rare food that I do consume - an omelette this time. Since I only eat regular food rarely, the food that I do eat I prepare for myself. Although hunger is usually triggered by trauma. Maybe this was enough to be considered a trauma. _

_I consider it a trauma, to be sure. Since I was completely unfeeling before I met you, events that took place were not enough to ruffle my feathers and I simply trudged through life unbuffered by happenings. Thusly, it is safe to say that this is the worst thing that has ever happened to me. Ever. I do not remember a time when I have been left feeling so out of character. I have a pressure on my chest, sitting over my ribs, an emotion I struggle to put a label on. It could either be grief, or loss, or pain, or any multitude of others. Perhaps I should pay a visit to the human world and pick up one of those 'teen romances' to see what they think heartbreak feels like. _

_I am not going to spend so much time telling you about myself. I am sure you are not interested in flipping through tomes of suffering. I would rather think about how this has occurred. If Aizen-sama is true to his word, then I have been erased from your memory. This notion sets my thoughts in turmoil. Is he filling your head with slippery lies about me? Did he tell you that I hurt you or tortured you in any way? I sincerely hope not. I could not bear it if you saw me once more and ran screaming in the other direction. _

_To tell you the truth, Orihime, I have only known you for about two or three weeks as of this transcription. But in those two or three weeks, I have loved you more than all the love you have ever received in your entire existence. It was as if I lived under a sky, with normal stars, nothing too spectacular. Then you shot across my sky like a fiery comet, a shooting star, burning it's bright way across my nondescript sky. But now that you are gone, I am blinded by your brightness. I can no longer see the stars. _

_Since you no longer have a memory, I shall tell you about yourself. Firstly, you talk a lot. And what you say about yourself and your life in Karakura Town has helped me shape an image of you. You once had an older brother by the name of Sora, who passed away when you were nine. Since he died, you have been living alone. Where your parents were during this time, alas, I cannot tell you. You were reluctant to speak of it. _

_You have a very close friend under the name of Arisawa Tatsuki who is a nationally known karate champion. You love to cook and from what you have told me, you seem to have a very strong preference for odd foods. You often lament on your friends' unwillingness to eat your food. You have many stuffed animals and asked me often if I would go and get one for y -_

Someone knocked violently on Ulquiorra's door, and, startled, he let the pen clatter to the desk. He frowned, not recalling inviting anyone to his rooms. Then his frown deepened as he remembered that there were people out there like Grimmjow, who didn't need an invitation and certainly didn't wait for one. Annoyed, Ulquiorra resigned himself to having to deal with his crass comrade's attitude for now and lagged his way to the door. He unlocked it and pulled it open, his eyes closed in acceptance of his fate.

"What do you want, Grimmjow." It was not a question. But the noise of surprise that came from the other side of the door definitely did not come from Grimmjow. In fact, Ulquiorra would be surprised if it was from a male at all.

He opened his eyes quickly. In front of him stood both a male and female Arrancar, looking about the ages of human seventeen year olds. The male had floppy light brown hair with amused dark eyes, a hollow hole at the base of his throat, and two white horns protruding from his skull. He was wearing a plain white hakama jacket and hakama pants that had black bars varying in thickness as they descended down his legs. The female had shoulder-length black hair that curled in at her neck, flapper-girl style. Her eyes were wide and inquisitive, and a white circlet rested at her forehead. Her outfit was high-collared, and circled under her breasts, covering one hip but not the other, revealing an off-center hollow hole that sliced through her right ribcage. She had on a short skirt and thigh-high socks that revealed silver daggers tucked into the hems.

"Hi, Ulquiorra-sama!" waved the female.

Irritation rose. "Who are you, and what do you want with me?" Ulquiorra asked, itching to return to his letter.

"I'm Daisuke, cuarenta tres Arrancar. And this is Emiko, cuarenta dos Arrancar. We're your new Fracción!" announced the male.

"No, you're not. Remove yourselves from my presence," Ulquiorra ordered in a monotone.

The female – Emiko – pouted. "Yes, we are," she said. "Aizen ordered it."

Ulquiorra noted the lack of honorific with interest. "Why on earth would he do such a thing?" he demanded. "Espada have always been permitted to choose their Fracción, or lack of such. Get out of my chambers; I hope to never see your faces again." He attempted to close the door, but Daisuke stuck his foot in it cheerfully.

"Aizen said that in light of recent events, he thought you might enjoy some company," he informed Ulquiorra.

The latter cursed under his breath. So that's what Aizen was up to; he was spying on Ulquiorra. "This would not be the first time I have disobeyed my master," he said. "I have no interest in either of you. Leave now before I am forced to assist you."

"Aizen told me not to tell you this, but I think you should know that my younger sister is the one you saw right before you were knocked out cold, just yesterday," Emiko said. "Her name is Anómino, the sexagésima sexta Arrancar."

Ulquiorra stood very still and eyed the duo in a new light.

"Like I said, Aizen told me not to say anything, but disobeying people is always way more fun than obeying them," Emiko said with a bashful grin and a shrug to go with it. "Especially when it comes to Aizen, King of Souls, Lord of Dance and Wizard of Oz."

"You forgot Bearer of the Bitch Curl," Daisuke added, nodding.

"Yeah, that too," Emiko agreed.

Ulquiorra stepped back. "I shall hear you out. But that does not mean that I will –"

"Yippee!" Daisuke cried, and scurried under Ulquiorra's arm. Emiko followed after, eagerly making her way into the room.

"Oh, man, your bed is so comfy!" Daisuke exclaimed, bouncing on it on his butt. Eagerly, Emiko joined him, and they jumped together on Ulquiorra's bed while laughing loudly. Finally they bored of that and climbed down, beginning to explore the rest of the room, leaving Ulquiorra shocked in the doorframe.

"Check out his closet! He's got, like, a million uniforms up in here!"

"Ooh, I bet this is where he hangs his sword up!" Emiko discovered, pointing to a rack on the wall.

"This pen is, like, _totally_ awesome." Daisuke held up the pen Ulquiorra had been writing with, admiring the bat design engraved on it. "Ooh, whatcha writing? _"My sweet Orihime –"_

Ulquiorra came out of his trance and sonido'ed across the room, snatching the papers out of Daisuke's hands. "None of your business."

"Touchy, touchy." Daisuke held up his hands. "Didn't know you wrote novels, Ulquiorra-sama. Romantic ones at that."

"Ooh, lemme see!" Emiko called from across the room, where she had been rummaging in his bureau. "This thing's completely empty!"

"I don't write romantic novels," Ulquiorra said crossly.

"Deny it all you want," Daisuke said, shaking his head profoundly.

Ulquiorra cursed under his breath. _Baka!_ It was just his luck to get stuck with these two morons. They would be the death of him. No way would two Arrancar this irritating be _his_ Fracción.

"If you do not show me why I should allow you to stay on as my subordinates in the next twenty seconds, I will Gran Rey Cero you both into ash," he threatened.

"Jeez, he's such a Debbie Downer." Emiko crossed her arms. "Fine. But I am sooo sitting on the bed."

After everyone was settled in – the Arrancar on the bed and Ulquiorra standing, facing them with his hands pocketed loosely – the Espada nodded at the other two. "Speak."

"Um, so I have this sister, Anómino. She's blind…and her zanpakuto has the power to erase memories."

"I'm sexy and I know it," Daisuke added.

Ulquiorra swallowed irritation. "So why does she need me?"

"She needs to see the image of the main thing she is making the person forget. So she could completely erase someone's memory, but it probably won't be as powerful. If she sees the image of something, though, the amnesia will stick for much, much longer."

Ulquiorra cursed under his breath. He had already come to the conclusion that the girl he had seen in Aizen-sama's throne room was the one who this woman was talking about. He could now only assume that she had brought him to the room in which Orihime's memories had been erased and let Anómino do her thing.

"Um…is something the matter, Ulquiorra-sama?" Emiko asked, leaning forward. "Did Anómino do something to you?"

Ulquiorra turned away and walked to the desk, picking up the letter and studying it. "Not to me, per se."

"What happened?"

Ulquiorra set down the papers and turned, closing his eyes. "I do not wish to discuss it."

"Yeah, but I do," Daisuke argued.

"You are my Fracción, you will do what I say," Ulquiorra ordered without thinking.

Emiko squealed, and Daisuke leapt up to do a victory dance. "Do you really mean it?" Emiko cried. "Can we really stay? Oh, please, Ulquiorra-sama!"

"I did not mean –"

"Too bad! You said it!" Daisuke gloated, waving his arms about.

Ulquiorra turned away with effort. _Orihime would like them,_ he thought crossly. _She'd love them, actually._

Suddenly a thought occurred to him, and he turned his gaze to the side, glancing at the two through his peripheral vision, watching Daisuke hit Emiko with a pillow. _I wonder…maybe they would help me get her back?_ He didn't know how powerful they were. They could both be very powerful. Since they weren't Espada, their numbers did not gage their rank, so there was no way to solve that mystery.

And, there was one other thing. These two Arrancar were the first he had encountered in Hueco Mundo who did not address their master as "Aizen-sama," instead, they blasphemously left out the suffix. But for some reason, they addressed _him_ as "Ulquiorra-sama." He wasn't sure exactly why this was. Maybe it was because something had happened to them against Aizen? Perhaps their master had harmed them in some way. But that didn't explain why Ulquiorra was held in such high regard to them.

Maybe Aizen had commanded them to address him as such, and they were acting under the overlord's law as usual, and were going to report his every move to Aizen.

Ulquiorra eyed the two suspiciously. It was better that he waited until he was absolutely sure they were on his side before he made his motives clear.

"If you two are interested in coming with me," Ulquiorra said quietly, waiting for the two to freeze in their pillow fight before continuing, "I suggest you make yourselves presentable. We are leaving right now."

Emiko dropped her pillow on Daisuke's head, since the boy was curled on his side on the bed, shaking with silent laugher. She blew bangs from her eyes and jumped off of the bed, brushing off her palms on the bed.

"Let's go!" she exclaimed.

Daisuke got to his feet, still giggling, and slid off the bed after her. Ulquiorra opened his door, and the two followed him out of his room, falling onto his right and left flanks and poking each other.

As they walked, Ulquiorra became aware of Nnoitra's presence down the hall. He drew in a breath and crossed his fingers inside his pocket, but it was in vain. Spotting a shadow detach from the wall and make its way toward him, Ulquiorra cursed every godly deity he knew with the most vulgar inner language he could think up.

"Hey, Bat boy. T'sup?" Nnoitra sneered as Ulquiorra passed. "Who're these brats?"

Behind him, Daisuke and Emiko ceased their poking and fell silent, eyeing the lanky Espada warily.

"These are my Fracción," Ulquiorra stated calmly.

"Ooh, are they now. Care to introduce me?"

"No."

"Awh, come on. Don't be a party pooper. Let's see…oh, by Aizen's left toenail. Is that nada's big sister? She's a cute little fucker. I'd even make her my Fracción if Barragan hadn't got to her already. Old shit, that one, but he does move fast, if I do say so myself…"

"I would appreciate if you would refrain from speaking of Anómino in that way," Emiko said as politely as possible from behind Ulquiorra. "Just because she's the youngest around here does not mean you can talk as if she was trash, with all due respect, Nnoitra-sama."

"Feisty, isn't she?" Nnoitra laughed, showing his slimy tongue, and took a quick step forward. He lifted one finger and put it under Emiko's chin, raising her head to look at him. "She's cute too. And she can see too, what a bonus! I wouldn't mind –"

Daisuke's sword was drawn in the blink of an eye, and he pressed the tip to Nnoitra's throat. The black-haired Espada rolled his eye over lazily to look at Daisuke, without removing his finger from Emiko's chin. The girl was trembling slightly, her nostrils flaring.

"Please remove your hands from Emiko," Daisuke said with a dangerous calm. "Let this be the last time you touch her."

With the hand he had been holding Emiko's chin with, Nnoitra pushed the sword away from his neck. A huge grin spread across his face, revealing piano teeth.

"Well, well. Protective Fracción you got there, Bat King. But on the other hand, you got the sister of your woman's handmaiden…man, really got your hands full. Hey, next time I see your woman, how about I give her a little kiss for ya? I sure wouldn't mind…"

"Touch her and die," Ulquiorra promised. It was not an empty threat.

Nnoitra cackled, glad he had managed to provoke Ulquiorra. "Suit yourself. Although who knows? I might not be able to hold myself back from a feast like the one your woman offers. Ah well. I better be going. See you around, fucker."

His cackle rang in Ulquiorra's ears long after he left. Ulquiorra was rooted to the ground, using every ounce of willpower he owned to not chase after the lanky Espada and slay him on the spot.

"Is something wrong, Ulquiorra-sama? Who's the woman the Spoonspada was talking about?" Emiko enquired, breaking the silence.

"Nothing of your concern. Come, we have yet to fulfill our mission." Ulquiorra began walking, and the other two had no choice but to follow.

The poking war was long over now; Nnoitra had completely ruined the mood. Emiko and Daisuke walked silently behind Ulquiorra, solemn as their footsteps echoed off the walls.

It was a quiet and awkward walk to the tercera Espada's quarters, but when they arrived Ulquiorra knocked and then glanced at the Arrancar behind him, not breaking the silence but communicating with his eyes. Then the door was opened, and Ulquiorra looked at the blond Espada that stood curiously on the other side.

"Halibel," he said, inclining his head with respect for the woman. "I have need of your services. Could you give…?"

He handed her the paper with the letter. Her sea-green eyes scanned it briefly, then looked back at him.

"You didn't finish," she stated.

"I am having questionable company for an unknown period of time. It is finished for now. I suspect that if I even think about signing my name, Aizen-sama will have me killed."

"I shall deliver it to someone who can give it to her. Either that or I will give it to her myself," Halibel said.

"Arigato gosaimasu." Ulquiorra nodded again. Stepping back as Halibel gently shut the door, he turned to his Fracción.

"Questions can come later, when we are alone again. For now, are you two hungry?"

"Yeppersirmicdoodler!" Emiko said.

"I like tomatoes," Daisuke said randomly.

Ulquiorra sighed and headed for the kitchen.

It didn't take long for them to reach the kitchen, but the walk was a lot less quiet. Emiko and Daisuke bantered for the entire way there, and by the time they got there he was so annoyed that he almost didn't hear it.

Almost.

"Yup! …Is something wrong, Lilinette-chan, you look a little green…"

Ulquiorra froze as the voice met his ears.

_Her_ voice.

_Orihime._

* * *

**Dun dun dun...R&R?**_  
_

**Lol, Daisuke and Emiko are so fun to write.. XD**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: I wrote this in the car yesterday on a 16-hour drive. In the backseat were my little sister and my cousin, and I swear to God they talked about farts the entire way. Welcome to my life.**

**So what do you guys think about the new image manager thing? Cool, ne? Now I'll have to find some images to put as covers :)**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach. And now on with the story ~~**

"Oh, hang on Lilinette-kun! I dropped the soy sauce ~!"

Ulquiorra was rooted in place, his heart roaring in his ears. His face was locked on default, his eyes staring straight ahead as he wrestled with himself not to run in there and snatch her up and run away with her.

He felt something bump into his foot and looked down. The bottle of soy sauce was resting on the ground near his sandal. Mechanically he bent down and closed his fingers around the bottle, gripping it in his hands. Lifting his vision, he saw a delicate pair of feet stop just in front of him, and, startled, he straightened quickly. His head collided with the bottom of someone's chin, and he heard a yelp as the person bounced back.

Ulquiorra straightened his spine and his eyes fell on her. Her cheeks, stained red with embarrassment; her hair, tousled from her brief run; her eyes, wide and startled; her lips, stretched to form an 'O'. His gaze landed on those perfect lips, and a shiver of desire ran though him. Quickly he brought his gaze to those sparkling gray eyes.

"A-ah! Gomenasai gozaimasu!" she stuttered. Ulquiorra did not speak, simply gazed at her, drinking in her features. The hand with the bottle on soy sauce swung by his side, forgotten.

"A-ano...?" she questioned. "Excuse me, stranger-san, can I please have my sauce back...?"

Stranger-san.

It caught him off guard, but the phrase drilled a hole into his chest, shocking him at the pain. Wordless, he raised his hand and deposited the small bottle into her own two hands, brushing her palm with the tips of his fingers. He let his hand linger for a moment too long, and she uncertainly drew away from his cold touch.

"Arigato..." she said tentatively, unsurely, as he let his hand fall back to his side. A strand of hair fell in front of her face, and his hand twitched, itching to tuck it behind her ear.

_Stop this. Do you wish to cause her death? Now you know she does not remember you. You must leave now before you do something you regret_.

Without a single word, Ulquiorra turned on his heel and walked away, leaving the bewildered Orihime behind him.

Emiko and Daisuke followed him, equally confused. "Who was that, Ulquiorra-sama?" Emiko asked, glancing behind her.

"No one of importance." Ulquiorra's irritation for his two Fracción that he didn't even want had returned. He just wanted to go to his room and think about her and press the fingers she had touched to his black and white lips like a teenage human boy.

"Ya sure?" Daisuke wheedled.

"Yes." Ulquiorra couldn't stop the frustration from slipping from him.

"Yare, yare, I was just asking, Ulquiorra-sama."

"You sound like Ichimaru-sama," Emiko giggled, and poked Daisuke's back.

Again Ulquiorra took note of her use of 'sama'. Why did Ichimaru and himself deserve this when Aizen did not? It didn't make sense to him. Part of him was curious about what Aizen must have done to her to cause her to be so disrespectful to him? It must have been something bad, if she was willing to risk death or worse from him. But the other part didn't want to fraternize with them, didn't want them to think he cared about their pasts.

"Ano, Ulquiorra-sama, where are we going? I'm still hungry, you know," Daisuke whined. "Can't we just go back to the kitchens?"

"Do not expect me to feed you. If you cannot fend for yourselves that is a problem. I am not your father, nor are you a human baby that cannot fend for itself. If you are hungry, eat."

Abruptly, both Emiko and Daisuke broke into fits of giggles. Ulquiorra stopped and turned to look at both of them.

"What amuses you?" he demanded, which made them laugh harder. Positive that they had heard, and averse to repeating himself, Ulquiorra waited in a stony silence for one of them to answer.

"You talk...so funny...Ulquiorra-sama!" Daisuke gasped between giggles. At his words, they both collapsed in laughter again.

Ulquiorra didn't have the energy to be irritated by their antics. Instead, he pocketed his hands and turned without a word, letting his coattails swish behind him as he walked away from his Fracción.

The laughter stopped suddenly. There came a flurry of quick, pattering footsteps and he felt hands on his shoulders. "Aw, Ulquiorra-sama, don't be a party pooper. You're so booooring..."

"Anómino-neechan? Is that you?"

Ulquiorra looked up, and saw who Emiko was talking to. Approaching down the hall were Barragan's Fracción, Ggio Vega, as well as the blind Arrancar with the circlet who he remembered from - from that day...

Ggio nudged her, whispering to her, and her milky eyes widened. "Emiko-neechan? Is it you?"

"Yeah, it's me." Emiko tugged Daisuke's hand, and they ran up to Anómino and Ggio, letting the girls embrace. "Are you with Daisuke?" Anómino asked, and Emiko nodded cheerfully.

Ulquiorra hung back as his Fracción talked to the two newcomers. He studied the Arrancar girl who had assisted in ripping his dear Orihime away from him. She seemed frail, quiet, timid, and a little nervous and intimidated by his presence - the polar opposite of her sister, who was rude, brash, and irritating around him.

She didn't seem to be the type to wish ill upon anyone. Ulquiorra suspected that she was following the direct orders of Aizen.

On the other hand, Emiko had mentioned that she was waiting on Orihime...

He approached the group before he even realized what he was doing and stood between his Fracción and Barragan's. "Excuse me, Anómino," he said. "I was wondering if I might have a word with you. Privately."

"Um..." Anómino's sightless eyes shifted around nervously. It was obvious that she did not want to. However, she could not refuse, so she shakily nodded and followed Ulquiorra away from the group.

When he had gotten out of earshot from the other three, he turned, ignoring Daisuke's ogling stare. "You are the Arrancar in charge of Inoue Orihime, correct?" he asked her, and she nodded slowly.

"Yes, Ulquiorra-sama," she murmured almost inaudibly. _She is afraid of me,_ he realized with a jolt.

"I will not harm you," he reassured her, and she looked up, surprised. "How is she? Ori - Inoue, I mean?"

Anómino lowered her head guiltily.

"If I speak of her to you, Ulquiorra-sama, Aizen-sama will punish me," she whispered. "He will be so very angry. And you know what he can be like when he is very angry."

"If he finds out, you can tell him it was me. Tell him I forced you to. Just please, how is she?"

Anómino shivered, and began talking very quickly. "She believes that all the Arrancar here are her family. She addresses Aizen-sama as Chichi and all the Espada as her aniki."

Ulquiorra kept his face blank as he registered this information. So she called Aizen Chichi. His heart plummeted.

"She does not remember me at all then."

Anómino shook her head. "Gomen, no, Ulquiorra-sama. My power is absolute. She has no trace of memory for you."

"Is there any way she can regain her memory?"

"Usually the memory returns when I decide to lift the spell. But this time is different. Aizen-sama locked the process so it needs his authorization to be lifted. I am so sorry. I don't like this any more than you do, sir."

"Thank you," Ulquiorra said curtly, and nodded to her - not that she could see it. He turned abruptly and walked away, hands pocketed.

"You two are dismissed for the day," he said flatly to his Fracción. "I am going to retire now."

He strode away from their boggling gazes as quickly as he could without breaking character, which was much, much harder than usual.

Just like everything in his life.

**!**

Back in his room, Ulquiorra quickly and neatly removed his hakama jacket and white sandals and lay down on his bed in just his pants and socks. He raised his hand up perpendicular to the bed and splayed his fingers, examining them where his fingers had brushed hers.

Ironic, that just a couple of days ago he was taking her kisses like spare change. And now he was relishing the brush of her fingers like it was a million dollars.

Stranger-san.

He lowered his hand and pressed his fingers to his mouth, closing his eyes and imagining he could still smell the trace of her there.

**!**

_My sweet Orihime,_

_I saw you yesterday in the kitchen. You dropped a bottle of soy sauce and I picked it up for you. I didn't speak because I didn't want to ruin the moment. All I wanted to do was look at your sweet face for what might be the last time. But then you called me Stranger-san and I gave you the bottle and left._

_You touched my fingers._

_How I miss your touch, Orihime, always innocent and gentle and so loving. Pure like a lone rosebud in this wasteland desert._

_After I saw you, I saw your friend Anómino. The blind one. The one who erased me from your mind. She told me that you think of Aizen as a father figure, as someone who cares deeply for you. Orihime Inoue, this delusion is so far from the truth it's almost funny. _Aizen cares _nothing_ for you. Nothing._ I cannot stress this enough. He cares for no one but himself. He is trying to drive a stake between us. He is trying to turn you against me to punish me further. Please heed my warning, Onna. I am the one who loves you, and he does not want this._

_Although, if I see you again, I don't know what I'll do. The longing for you is almost too great. I miss you more than you know._

_-Ulquiorra._

Ulquiorra laid the pen down on the desk and folded the letter carefully in on itself, leaving it on his desktop. It was still early the next day, and he was about to go and give Halibel his new letter when a knock came at the door.

Ulquiorra stowed the letter in his jacket and rose, reaching for the handle of his door and pulling it open. A frown appeared on his face when he saw Grimmjow standing there, looking disheveled. Large bruises-like shadows mottled the teal markings under his eyes, his blue hair was even more disarrayed than usual, and he basically looked like complete and utter shit.

"I kissed her," he said dully.

Ulquiorra's eyes widened.

The two men stood silently looking at each other, one dull and sick-looking and one with a shocked look on his face and a betrayed light in his eyes.

"Can I come in?" Grimmjow said eventually.

Ulquiorra stepped back silently and Grimmjow walked slowly into the room before flopping face down on Ulquiorra's bed. Ulquiorra stood with his hands in his pockets near the bottom of the bed, his expression back under control.

"Explain yourself," he ordered the blue-haired man.

"Long story short: she wanted me to train her. I said I would if she could fight me off. Then it just kind of happened."

"I want the long story now, or you get Ceroed to ash," Ulquiorra said, his voice tight.

Surprisingly, Grimmjow didn't argue.

"Well, I went to her room because Aizen wants all the 'aniki' to get to know each other. It's revolting, the way he makes us all act around her. She honestly believes we're all one big, happy family. I just feel bad for Ggio and Anómino, cause they have to keep it up all the time. Anyway, while I was there, I offered to train her. She seemed interested, so I told her if she wanted she'd have to fight me off first. Then I..." On the bed, Grimmjow physically shuddered. "I forgot that she doesn't remember getting it on with you, so I kissed her. A lot of times. She was fightin' it, though. She eventually bit me and it hurt like hell. So I backed off. I explained how it was like a real battle, and she seemed to get it, but then..." Again Grimmjow shuddered on the bed. "She seemed...I don't know, upset, and then I remembered that she thought that was her first kiss, and she started crying, and I just..." He trailed off helplessly.

Ulquiorra was lost for words.

"So I kissed her again, but not as rough, and told her to pretend that was her first kiss instead of the other one. Not that it was, though, her first kiss was definitely yours," he added dully.

Ulquiorra was rooted to the ground. It wasn't fair! It. Wasn't. Fair!

"Do whatever you want to me," Grimmjow mumbled into Ulquiorra's pillow. "Do whatever you want. I deserve it. I fucking deserve it for taking fucking advantage of her."

Ulquiorra turned away.

"I've been losing sleep over this, man," Grimmjow confessed. His fingers twitched. "I tossed and turned all night. I look like shit."

"I'm not going to do anything to you," Ulquiorra said quietly. Behind him he heard Grimmjow's head lift from the pillow in surprise, but he didn't turn around. "As long...as long as she's happy, it's okay. She's not mine to look after anymore."

Grimmjow was thankfully quiet.

"But." Ulquiorra turned around and met Grimmjow's azure gaze. "If _she_ ever kisses _you_, or anyone else for that matter..."

He let the sentence hang, and Grimmjow seemed to understand.

"Let's get outta here," he said.

**!**

She looked so beautiful.

Ulquiorra stopped in the entryway, his eyes fixed on her. She was seated on a small pillow next to Aizen's throne, raised so high above everyone else. Chatting happily with him while he smiled amusedly and watched everyone below.

She was wearing a pure white kimono with black hems on the sleeves, a black obi, and a pure black circle over her heart. On her head rested a dainty circlet with a milky stone set in the center.

"She looks pretty good, but you want to keep moving," Grimmjow muttered from behind him, and Ulquiorra was brought back to earth with an unpleasant thump. "Don't want to attract Aizen's attention."

"Konnichi wa, Ulquiorra-samaaaa~"

Grimmjow began to laugh loudly as Ulquiorra was glomphed by his Fracción Daisuke. Ulquiorra tossed the annoying man off as Emiko approached, also laughing.

"Please refrain from touching me," Ulquiorra commanded.

"Hai!"

Ulquiorra looked around. Aizen had called a meeting, and so most of the Arrancar were just milling around in the room, with Aizen and Orihime up there lording it over everyone.

"Nii-san! Konnichi wa!" a melodious voice floated above their heads. Grimmjow looked up, and Ulquiorra followed his gaze to see his auburn-haired princess waving at the man standing next to him. Aizen said something to her, and she nodded excitedly. A random Arrancar lifted her down from the throne and deposited her at Grimmjow's feet.

Ulquiorra held perfectly still, aware that Aizen was watching him carefully for a reaction. Well, he was not going to give one. He would stand completely still and not think about her mesmerizing face with its pink lips and flushed cheeks. He wasn't going to think about how that white kimono hugged her body in all the right places or how her hair seemed to set her on fire. He wondered if it was still as soft as it used to be.

No, he wasn't going to think about any of that.

"Nii-san!" she yelled, just as she jumped and moved to wrap her arms around his neck. Grimmjow didn't even turn, but instead bent playfully, causing Orihime to miss. Her face morphed into shock and fear, but just as she was about to fall face first into the ground he straightened, and flipped her onto his shoulders quickly and effortlessly.

Ulquiorra's stomach twisted painfully, but he couldn't look away from the girl.

"Nii-san! Put me down! I'm going to fall!" she squealed as Grimmjow playfully jerked forwards, causing her hands to knot into his bright blue hair.

"Baaaka. Do you seriously think that I'd ever let you fall?" he asked with a smirk. Orihime giggled, then seemed to notice them and recognize them from the day in the kitchen.

"Oh! I remember you!" Orihime sais, smiling at them from her perch. "Sorry I didn't introduce myself properly last time, hajimamashite! I'm Inoue Orihime, or," Orihime paused and touched a finger to her chin thoughtfully, thinking aloud. "Is it Aizen Orihime, since that's what Chichi's last name is?"

Ulquiorra's breath caught in his throat. It was one thing to hear about it, but here, listening to Orihime's devotion to that man straight from her mouth was something completely different altogether.

"Oh! So you're Orihime! Wow! Pleased to meet you, I'm Emiko! That's my friend Daisuke, and this is Ulquiorra-sama!" Emiko said cheerfully, waving up at Orihime.

Ulquiorra looked at Grimmjow, and their eyes met. Grimmjow seemed to see the request Ulquiorra was asking him, and nodded once slightly. Take her away from me, please, before I do something I regret. Take her away before she ends up dead.

"Konnichi wa Daisuke-kun, Ulquiorra-kun!" Orihime said happily. "Ne ne, Grimmjow-niisan, are they your Fracción?" she asked curiously, pulling Grimmjow's hair lightly.

He laughed, then began to walk away, Orihime swaying above him. "Later, Emospada!" he called over his shoulder as he walked away from them, still chortling, with Orihime perched on his shoulders, the latter wacking Grimmjow's head, nagging him to focus his attention on her.

Ulquiorra watched them walk away. Orihime looked back one time, but after that she focused on Grimmjow as he carried her away.

Ulquiorra looked up at Aizen to see that the man had been watching the entire interaction with his same little smile, and inside his pockets, Ulquiorra's hands curled into fists.

**So what do you gais think? R&R!**

**Nifty: Boring...**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: So last week me and moony wrote what we both thought were pretty bacontastic chapters. We posted and waited...good thing we weren't holding our breath cause we'd be dead. I was like 'did everyone's Internet die?' ok well eventually I did get 2 reviews but I'm still a little sad. It was not a lot of feedback for the work I put into this chapter. /tear.**

**Ulquiorra: uhm...it's ok. **

**Elfman: BE A MAN ABOUT IT!**

**Me: O-okay...**

Ulquiorra let his eyes remain focused on the spot where his auburn-haired love had ridden off on the back of her blue-haired knight in shining armor. At last he wrenched his eyes away from where all the white-clad Arrancar had closed in around them, filling the space they had left as easy as air. Ulquiorra turned his gaze up to Aizen, seeing the man's face set in an easy smile and his cold brown eyes on Ulquiorra. The latter swallowed hard and turned away from his master, letting himself be engulfed by the white beings around him.

He wandered through the mass of people aimlessly, not paying attention to where he was going. All he cared about was staying away from Grimmjow and Orihime, because the sight of them was making his Hollow hole ache. His Fracciónes trailed behind him, greeting random Arrancar and then catching up to him, loudly voicing their opinions on his random walking and refusal to speak to anyone. But he didn't stop, lost in his thoughts, his eyes focused on the ground in front of him.

Aizen had called all of his army together. He said he wanted them to mingle and get to know each other, but Ulquiorra suspected that in reality he just wanted to see how large his forces were. Maybe he'd speak later or something, but right now he was just watching them. Watching Ulquiorra.

Someone tapped Ulquiorra's shoulder, rousing him from his thoughts. He looked up to see the face of Tia Halibel, partly covered by her white collar, as usual. She tiled her head to the side when his eyes met hers.

"Halibel," he greeted.

"Musing, Ulquiorra?" she asked him, but he didn't respond. He had nothing to say.

"I have something for you," she murmured. "It's from her."

She didn't need to say any names. Ulquiorra knew who she was talking about, and he felt anticipation begin to slither through his body, although he was careful to keep his face blank.

"Aizen has been watching me this whole time, and I do not think he intends to stop now."

"Did you even look? He is watching Nnoitra."

Ulquiorra glanced up at their master, raised so high above them all. His eyes were indeed aimed in a different direction.

"Alright." Ulquiorra turned back to the exotic woman in front of him. "What is it that you have for me?"

"I suggested to Anómino-san that she get Inoue-san to write letters. I think she can remember the idea of someone, but not actually anyone. She has been writing a lot, from what Anómino-san tells me, and today she gave me the first letter."

Halibel lifted her other hand, which until now she had been keeping by her side. In it was an envelope, slightly battered from the amount of times it had changed hands. On the front was his name, written in smooth blue ink.

"That's not her handwriting," Ulquiorra said after glancing at it. He flipped the letter over and saw that it was stamped with Halibel's shark seal. He raised his eyes to Halibel, questioning with his gaze.

"I put it in an envelope and marked it with my seal and your name so it would get to you and would not be opened if I lost it," she murmured, and gestured to the door. "Go, Ulquiorra. You've been here long enough. Go back and read her words."

So he did.

* * *

_Dear _,_

_I know that you probably can't tell, but it's very, very early in the morning here-not that I would really know. The sky inside the dome never changes, and outside it's always night…so does that mean that if I'm inside the dome it's morning, and if I'm outside it's night? Actually never mind, that's off topic. But yeah, basically, I'm not sure what time it is, all I know is that people are still asleep-so I have to whisper if I want to talk. Ggio-nii and Anónimo-chan still haven't come back, but I did find a little red bean bun on my night stand when I woke up. I bet that it was Anó-chan. It doesn't seem to be in Ggio-nii's character to do something like that, and I don't know Abirama-nii, Findorr-nii, Choe-nii, or Niggre-nii well enough to know if they'd do it…but Charlotte-nii might. But, then again, I doubt that he'd be quiet enough not to wake me, judging by how he greeted me yesterday (^^)"._

_Anyways, do you like my nickname for Anónimo-chan? I like it, only, it sounds exactly like "ano", like the sound that you make when you don't know what to say. I guess that that shouldn't be her nickname then…what do you think? I kinda feel bad for Mino-chan (actually, no, that doesn't sound right as her nickname either. If I had to pick, 'Anó' is a better one than 'Mino'.). The others seem to treat her unfairly. Brotherly love perhaps? I guess that I'll have to ask her myself, now won't I? What do you think _?_

_I know that it probably hasn't been that long since I was with the others, but I'm lonely. And…I've had time to think about something. I remember some things now too. The faces that I had remembered before? Now I remember names: Tatsuki-chan, Sado-kun, Ishida-kun, and Kurosaki-kun. And, and I think that Kurosaki-kun is really special to me. I can feel it. There's…eto…how to explain it. Hmmm…a pull? Yeah, something like that, a pull that I feel when I think about him…it's just it hurts. And it makes me sad when I think about it. There's another girl's face. She's really small-shorter than me!- and she's wearing black clothing, and is holding a sword. Is-is she a shinigami? Tou-san says that they're very bad, is that why I feel a little envious and jealous when I think of her? I'm still really confused._

_But, talking to you _, it makes me feel safe. I feel like, like I just drank a whole mug of hot chocolate full of melted marshmallows with wasabi and soy sause drizzled on top! That's how you make me feel :3 I love drinking hot chocolate like that, it's the best way to drink it, don't you agree? Anyways, I hope that you're doing okay where ever you are _. I really miss you! Write back to me as soon as you can, okay?_

_\(^3^)/_

_-Inoue Orihime_

Below that she had doodled in the free space, a chibi of herself holding the hand of a generic-looking Arrancar. The face of the Arrancar was a slightly darker shade than the paper, as if she had drawn his face multiple times and erased it because it hadn't been quite right. Expressionless, he read the letter again.

There were so many questions that he had. How, exactly, had Cuulhorne greeted her that day? Why would the girl Anómino have left a red bean bun on her nightstand? Did the girl sneak in when she was sleeping? Why was she mistreated by Barragan's Fracción when Inoue herself seemed to be treated so well? But if she was treated so well, why did she feel lonely? And what on earth was the nonsense about Kurosaki being special?

He was almost angry about that, almost jealous... But then the next paragraph came. How talking to him, even just an idea of him, made her feel safe. Like she had been drinking hot chocolate with marshmallows and...Wasabi and soy sauce. And the sketch at the bottom...She had drawn herself holding hands with an idea of an Arrancar. She knew what Kurosaki's face looked like, but she didn't sketch it on the paper. In fact she hadn't drawn it anywhere, at all. And even though she didn't know what he looked like, she had drawn him, an idea of him, and close to her. Holding hands, touching.

He folded up the letter and pushed it back in the envelope, propping it on the desk. Then he unzipped his jacket, unstrapped his sandals and pulled off his socks, unbuckled his belt and let his pants drop to the floor. Feeling like a complete and total pile of crap, he didn't even bother to hang up his dirty uniform for the cleaners. Instead, he just crawled into bed in his underwear, curled up on his side like a baby, horn pointing to the sky, fell asleep and dreamed of her.

* * *

_-I'm coming in._

_It's your standard way of opening the door, letting her know you are coming. It doesn't really matter; what could she be doing in there anyway? But you still do it. Chivalrous, that's what you are; that's your reputation that will definitely be ruined after today._

_Your hand connects with the doorknob, and with a slight twist and push, you can see her. Her red hair flows down her back like liquid flames, highlighted by the black and white dress garment she sports on Aizen-sama's command. She is sitting on the floor, in the patch of light made by the moon. Her head turns when she hears you coming in, and a quizzical look comes over her face when she sees you have no food._

_-Hello, Ulquiorra-kun, she says, as politely as she can with the confusion still evident in her voice._

_-Inoue, you say curtly. Your greeting is short and to the point as usual, but not for the reason it usually is. Green eyes trace her face, her figure, and you stand in silence and study each other._

_-A-ano…? she asks timidly. –Are you here for a reason, Ulquiorra?_

_-I never do things without reason, you remind her distractedly. _

_-Care to share your reason with me?_

_You let go of the door, and it swings shut behind you with a loud _clack._ –I wish to talk with you, you say._

_-Talk away._

_You take quick footsteps over to the couch and sink onto the surface of it, without taking your eyes from her. She scrambles up as well and sits next to you, closer than you thought she would. It makes you want to hold your breath, afraid a sudden movement will startle her away._

_-I had…a question for you, Onna._

_This makes her blush, although you are not sure why. One think you cannot deny, however, is the uncomfortable atmosphere. Did you do this? You aren't sure._

_-Okay._

_You take a moment to prepare yourself to ask the question. Honestly you've never had a discussion like this before. _

_-What did you say the four elements of love are, Onna?_

_She has talked about this before, mindlessly spoke of what love is, of what it can be. In a hypnotic voice, half-dreaming, she spoke of the four things when she thought you weren't listening. But you were, you were listening and you heard her and you've thought about it ever since._

_She looks at you, startled. –What do you mean?_

_-Do not make me repeat myself._

_-You heard that? she asks, incredulous._

_-Of course I did. Now will you please answer my question with a statement instead of more of your own?_

_She looks away from you now, into her hands, her hair falling over her shoulder as she gazes at her palms. -If you love someone, you want the best for them. You want them to succeed. You always want to be with them. You try to protect them and you would sacrifice anything for them. Her cheeks flush a bit. -At least, that's what I've felt from my experience._

_-I see. So, if all four of these urges were present, would that mean love was present? you ask, clarifying, seeking to understand. _

_She blinks and looks back at you. -Well, yes, I suppose. Why are you asking?_

_-I see. Well then, Onna, I think it would be appropriate to say that I am in this "love" with you._

_Red stains her cheeks now, and you reach out with your pale hand, lightly grasping her jawline with your hand and pulling her face towards yours. Her gray eyes are wide with shock, emotion swimming in their depths._

_-I hope I am doing the right thing, you murmur. –I do not know about all of these things yet. If I am doing something wrong, stop me._

_She just looks at you, gaping, her chin still in your hands. And then you lean forward and let your mouth meet hers in the kiss that starts it all._

* * *

_The next day you return to her, because you left after that small kiss to retreat and gather your wits, all of which have fled after confessing to her. You open the door after your usual warning, and see that she is sitting on the couch, waiting for you._

_-Come here, she smiles, beckoning you with a pat beside her. You follow like you are a small child and she is waving candy. _Pathetic,_ a dry, slithering voice – Murciélago – comments in the back of your mind, but you brush off the batlike demon and sit gingerly beside her._

_-I have food this time, you say as a nameless Arrancar wheels in the cart loaded with food._

_-Yay! she exclaims, and claps her hands with delight, pausing with embarrassment as a loud rumble fills the room. Heat floods her cheeks, and she smiles nervously, her eyes closing as she cringes._

_-Ano…gomen! Just a little hungry! she shrieks, and the Arrancar backs out of the room and closes the door behind him._

_-It is fine. It was I who neglected my duties yesterday, anyway. You reach out and pull the cart closer, so that all the food that is on it is right beneath her nose. Her eyes fixate on it, and you can almost hear her salivating._

_-Let's eat and talk, she decides. –Itadakimasu! _

_It's the fastest blessing you've ever heard. She picks up her fork and begins shoveling food in her mouth at a speed faster than Kurosaki's Bankai._

_-Slow down, Onna. You will give yourself a stomach ache._

_She pauses, forkful of food halfway to her mouth. Somehow even though she has been eating at the speed of sound she has succeeded in not dropping a single morsel of food on her garment._

_-Gomenasai, Ulquiorra-kun! I suppose you think I'm a pig, don't you?_

_-Not at all, you say. –On the contrary I think it is fascinating. _

_When she looks confused, you elaborate. –I myself do not consume human food very often. Usually only when a trauma occurs to my body or mind._

_-What d'you eat, then?_

_-I feed off the living Reatsu in the atmosphere. Otherwise nothing. _

_-You live off of air. She frowns, as if trying to imagine such a concept._

_-Yes._

_Suddenly her face breaks into a huge grin, and she draws in a loud breath. –Sugoi! That is so kawaii, Ulquiorra-kun! _

_You open your mouth to say something, but are distracted by her lips. Pink and plump and marred by a grain of rice. –Onna. You have something… You gesture to your own mouth, and her smile fades. A beat of regret skips through you._

_-Here? She swipes at her mouth, missing the morsel._

_-No, you missed. Right, um… You point to your own mouth again, and she mirrors you, pushing at the complete wrong side altogether._

_-There?_

_-No. Now you take her hand and guide it to her lips, using your fingers to control her own, brushing the rice from her mouth to her lap. The rice falls and you are frozen together, eyes locked. A blush creeps up her cheeks, but you cannot look away from her. _

_Slowly you lean forward, and like a puppet on a string she imitates you until your noses are a centimeter apart. As her eyes slide closed, yours do to, and your noses brush as your lips meet hers._

_You can taste her exotic food lingering on her lips, the way she mixed all those different dishes together to create something that belonged in Szayelaporro's lab, although she had consumed it too fast to notice. You can also taste a sweetness that lingers on her lips. Your nose, so close to her skin, picks up her own personal scent that lingers even after so long in the washed-out Las Noches, the smell of rain and hibiscus flowers, of wet pine trees and dawn, and waterfalls and moss and that sweet aura that she carries with her. _

_Instinct takes over; you let your tongue slip from between mismatched lips and nudge her own, pink lips with it. Tracing the outline of both of them, the bottom and the top, and running your tongue on the opening where they split to smile and laugh and sing. Now she opens them for you, hesitantly, and you dodge inside and the taste hits you – but it tastes amazing, it tastes like her._

_She is almost in your lap now, one leg sprawled over your thighs, and her fingers are twined together behind your neck. Your own hands caress her tumbling red hair – but it's not just red, it's orange and yellow and pink and gold, and it is alive and passionate, and as you run your fingers through it you can feel the energy and feel the way it is responding to your touch, feel the way she is responding to your touch. _

_Heat pools in your gut, and you break away from her lips, both of you gasping for air. Her chest is rising and falling rapidly, and it's hard to look away._

_-Am I doing this right? you ask._

_-I…I wouldn't know, she says breathlessly. –I've never done this either._

_-Then we will learn together, you say, and lean into her lips again._

Ulquiorra woke, gasping, from yet another dream.

It had been a week since he had last seen her at that meeting. In that time, he had been training relentlessly, determined to push all thoughts of her from his mind. But it was to no avail. Each strike, each thrust that he made with his sword just reminded him of how he had failed to keep her by his side.

What was even worse, somehow, was that his Fracción had gone to the World of the Living and had somehow gotten supplies from a craft store. Yesterday they had shown up in the middle of his practice, baring banners that screamed encouraging catchphrases in violent colors, draped in headbands and ribbons and all sorts of paraphernalia, screaming and chanting and egging him on at the top of their voices. Somehow nothing he could do made them stop and cease the noise, and they carried on until he finally sheathed his sword and dripped his way to the showers.

In all this time he had been too busy to write any more letters, nor had he received any from Halibel. Had she only written one? It did not matter. She was writing to a face she didn't even know, after all. But he had no excuse. He decided, laying covered in sweat and draped in sticky blankets, that he would write her again.

His chest heaved for a moment as he lay there in bed, propped on his elbows with his head dangling back. Finally he pulled himself together and pushed back the sheets, letting the cool air wash over his damp skin in a refreshing way. He climbed into his clothes and sat down at his desk, pulling out his green ink pen and a fresh sheet of stationery.

_My sweet Orihime,_

_I keep having dreams about the time before you were taken from me. It seems like so long since I have seen your face. But I must ask you this. I know your memories are fractured, but do you remember what you told me about the four elements of love, Orihime? The first; you want them to succeed. The second; you always want to be with them. The third; you try to protect them and, the fourth; you would sacrifice anything for them. This is what you yourself told me, Onna. But I think you left one out. The fifth element of love: when you are away from them, you want to be with them. You feel like there is a part of you missing, like someone reached into your chest and drew out an organ and left a big bloody tear in your chest, like they kicked your head and left you there on the ground to die. Like they took that organ, that vital organ, and locked it up somewhere, and whispered sweet nothings to it so that it didn't think it was missing anything, like they twisted its mind and made it believe that what it used to cherish was something evil, something that should be pushed away and turned from, something that you wouldn't touch with a thirty-nine-and-a-half foot pole. Like they took your very beating heart from you and would never ever give it back._

_That is all._

_-Ulquiorra._

__**Please review and warm my frozen little heart...no seriously I've been playing in the sprinkler with my kiddlins the last hour and I'm freezing cold :)**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: HI! Me again! (obv) So...I think you lot will enjoy this chapter ... Ulquiorra may seem a little OOC but you know what? I think it's worth it. You'll all hopefully enjoy it, so I'll let you get right to it...**

_My sweet Orihime,_

_Halibel delivered two more of your letters to me today. They made me even more confused, if that is even possible. One thing I need to make clear to you: I am the man who was outside the door. I am the man who handed you your soy sauce. I am the man who you believe is Grimmjow's Fracción, although I am actually the fourth Espada and thusly ranked higher than him. My name is Ulquiorra Schiffer. I am your lover. _

_Orihime, let me enlighten you on something. Tesla Lindocruz is NOT the one you are searching for. I saw you two today in the kitchens, and it hurt me more that a knife in my chest. How could you do this to me? What would make you think that a bland, dry man such as him could possibly be your lover? He is loyal to but one person, and that is his master Nnoitra Gilga. Listen to me, Orihime. If you get anything from this letter, please let it be that you stay away from that man. If you love me at all. Leave him be. _

Ulquiorra set down his pen then, although he wasn't finished with his writing yet. Just thinking about the two of them was making his hands shake a little bit. She had been singing for him, they had been singing together. Feeding each other. It was disgusting!

Like you two never did that, a nasty little voice whispered in the back of his head.

Ulquiorra stood. He was going stir-crazy, he decided. He needed to go out and do something. Maybe he would go out and beat up Tesla. Or maybe he would go to the World of the Living. He didn't know, and he didn't care. He just had to get out his frustration somehow.

Ulquiorra opened the door and walked stiffly down the hall. Why did he feel so out of character recently, he wondered. It was unsettling and strange. Damn that woman, provoking such actions from him.

He needed to get some air. As he walked down the halls, an idea began to form in his mind. He turned his feet in the direction of the lab and resigned himself to the fact that he'd have to spend some time in the company of the most crazyfuckinginsane inhabitant of Las Noches in order to get what he wanted.

**!**

"If you're here for some kind of potion to make her remember you, you should just leave. I'm not going to give it to you."

Ulquiorra was struck suddenly with all the reasons he disliked Szayelaporro Granz. He hadn't been around the mad scientist in a while, so he was beginning to think that maybe he was wrong about the man and all his unfortunate downsides. However, with just one utterance, the octava Espada had managed to remind him of every single one.

"You must take me for a fool," Ulquiorra told him, his voice slightly chilly. "I would not ask you to commit treason against Aizen-sama for myself. We are not exactly close. It would be a pointless endeavor to ask that particular thing of you."

"Well, what did you come here for then?" Szayelaporro asked. He crossed his arms and tossed his bubblegum-pink hair. Ulquiorra bored his viridian eyes into Szayelaporro's golden ones.

"A favor."

Szayelaporro smiled then, an insane smile that instantly made Ulquiorra uneasy. "I like the sound of that," he said with a little chuckle. "Come in, Cuarta. Let's see if we can strike us a deal."

Ulquiorra followed the mad scientist into his lab unwillingly. He did realize that he had come to Szayelaporro for help, not the other way around. Still, he had hoped to get the transaction over with without having to set a foot inside the man's territory - the lab.

"Welcome, welcome, welcome," Szayelaporro said, sweeping into a room that was lit with the soft glow of computers, which it was full of. A couple of them were attended by some of his many Fracción. "So, Schiffer-san, what can I get for you today?"

"You may address me as Ulquiorra."

"Fine, Ulquiorra. You came here to strike a deal, did you not?"

"I did indeed." Ulquiorra was now seriously regretting coming here. _It's for her,_ he reminded himself, and fought on. "You are capable of making these 'gigai' things, are you not? The prototypes invented by Urahara Kisuke?"

"Do not speak his name in this lab," Szayelaporro snapped. "That man may be a brilliant scientist but he totally failed at life. He couldn't even handle being a Shinigami, so he decided to waste his talent on candy. He is the lowest of the low, so despite his brilliance I simply cannot respect him as a scientist. He has failed at reaching perfection."

"Can you make these gigais or not?"

Szayelaporro looked a little offended. "Of course I can. Urahara Kisuke may have failed at reaching perfection, but I have not. I am perfect. I can create the perfect gigai." When he saw the spark of interest in Ulquiorra's eye, he frowned and added, "For a price, of course."

"So if I can have a gigai and some human currency, what would the price be?"

"As always: a favor for a favor, Cuarta. I will collect later. So, you desire a human gigai - which means you need human clothing. Maybe about ¥15,000. Does that sound suitable to you?"

"It sounds appropriate, and so does the bargain. Aizen-sama need not know about this transaction, I trust?"

"I shall not tell him unless he asks," Szayelaporro said smoothly. "Consider that if he finds out, your side of the deal is canceled out and you have received my goods for free."

The punishment would be payment enough, Ulquiorra thought grimly, which was what he was sure the Octava Espada was thinking as well.

"So may I have it now?" he asked, itching to get out of the creepy lab.

"Yes, you may," Szayelaporro said. "Right this way, if you please."

Ulquiorra followed him into a different room. Inside this one were a few tables. Each had a body strapped to it; buck naked and with generic features. Ulquiorra could see two males and two females.

"You will obviously need a male," Szayelaporro said with a little laugh, "unless there is something you haven't told me."

Ulquiorra watched him coldly.

Szayelaporro unstrapped the gigai and heaved it off of the table. Holding in under its arms, he dragged it a little away from the table and laid it down on the floor.

"Undress and lay on the body," Szayelaporro said. Anyone else would have asked him if he was out of his mind (to which he would have happily responded "yes, of course), but Ulquiorra didn't bat an eyelash. He unzipped his jacket and had shrugged it off before Szayelaporro realized that Ulquiorra wasn't going to ask him to turn and turned himself around.

Ulquiorra slipped out of his pants, socks and shoes and approached the body, feeling awkward beyond belief. He glanced at Szayelaporro's pink head, realizing that the man might turn around any minute and he had better move fast.

He tentatively put his right big toe against the gigai's right big toe. Instantly the pressure from him touching the gigai made his toe actually sink into the fake one. The toe turned ivory, like Ulquiorra's own skin; the nail turned black. Intrigued despite himself, Ulquiorra hesitantly sat on the gigai's stomach. His body sank right through the gigai's – where he had sat down, the skin lightened to paper white, and his abs could be seen. He could feel the cold stone floor beneath his bare bottom.

Before he could have any more second thoughts, Ulquiorra lay back against the gigai. He had a brief moment of panic when his head sank through before it melded, but then he was seeing through the gigai's eyes. He sat and flexed his fingers, stretching his arms and rotating his shoulders around. Then he frowned, realizing that Szayelaporro's spiritual pressure had disappeared.

_Where'd he – ?_

Ulquiorra looked up and saw Szayelaporro still standing there, although one of his Fracción must have brought clothing because Szayelaporro was holding a bundle of fabric. But Ulquiorra couldn't feel his spiritual pressure.

"Is there no reatsu sensing? I thought you said this was a perfect gigai."

"It is, I assure you," Szayelaporro said crossly. "There is no sensing of reatsu in the gigai because I wanted to make it that much more perfect. Can a human sense reatsu? No, they cannot."

_She's human, and she can sense reatsu,_ Ulquiorra thought but didn't say.

"Would you like to get dressed?" Szayelaporro asked, but didn't even give Ulquiorra a chance before he tossed Ulquiorra the clothing. As the latter stood, he glimpsed down and saw that his hollow hole was gone. He brought up his hand and rubbed his chest – whole, white, smooth- where the hole had been.

"Your mask is gone, too," Szayelaporro informed him.

"My tattoo is not," Ulquiorra noted.

"Neither is the estigma on your face," Szayelaporro said. "Now would you please put some underwear on, you're seriously making me uncomfortable. Normally I wouldn't mind, but since I have to see you again after this…"

"I understand," Ulquiorra said. Szayelaporro tossed him a pair of boxers, which he struggled into. Then he was handed a pair of black jeans.

"What on earth…?"

"Pants." Szayelaporro said happily. "I picked out an outfit I thought would look the best with your particular features. These are known as 'skinny jeans.' They are very popular in America!"

"How do you put them on…?"

"Unbutton them and then put your legs through the holes with the zipper in the front."

Ulquiorra did as he was told and then buttoned and zipped the jeans. Szayelaporro gave him a dark, tight-fitting long-sleeved T-shirt.

"It's winter in the World of the Living, so you'll need this." He was then given a soft green pea coat and a black scarf. "You'll find the money in the coat pocket. Here are some socks and sneakers. And then you're off. You won't be able to open a Garganta, so here is a remote which will call me and I will open it for you."

Ulquiorra pocketed the device Szayelaporro handed him and then put on his shoes. "Thank you, Octava," he said, which was rare for him.

Szayelaporro only smiled and then snapped his fingers. The familiar tear appeared in the sky, and Ulquiorra stepped through.

"Have fun…" were Szayelaporro's last words before the gateway closed behind him.

**!**

Ulquiorra appeared suddenly behind a tree on a sidewalk, feeling rather disoriented. He quickly discovered that Szayelaporro was right about the weather, so he buttoned his coat and looped on the scarf over his neck. Then he jammed his hands in his pockets and set off down the street.

The wind was blowing at Ulquiorra's back, making the strands of his hair slightly obstruct his vision as they blew before his face. Still, he did not hunch his shoulders, but stood tall against the chill as he ambled down the street without any particular rush. The occasional brown leaf swirled down the street, but otherwise there was no other movement around him.

_This should be easy,_ he thought to himself. _I just need to find one of those bookstores._

He came to the end of the street and saw that he was at an intersection. The street perpendicular to the one he was on was busier; cars rushed down the street, and pedestrians hurried by all hunched over. The sky was slightly overcast, creating a gray sort of feel to the afternoon, and many of the people on the sidewalk were clutching umbrellas to their chests as if in preparation for some sort of storm.

To his right, Ulquiorra could see that the road wound off into the distance; to his left he could see buildings and storefronts. Each store had a different colored awning out front; some had signs with handwritten advertisements for the wares inside, and some even had racks of clothing that were something called 'on sale' for whatever reason. No one seemed to be stopping to admire the clothing that was on sale, so Ulquiorra figured that if one was on sale it must be a bad thing; why else would those particular garments be isolated from the rest? It must be like quarantine.

He set off to the left in the direction of the stores when he noticed that one of them had a folding table with boxes full of books. When he reached the store he stopped in front of the books and picked one up.

_Wild, Wild West_, it said. He put that down and picked up another.

_What To Do In a Zombie Apocalypse,_ said the next, then_, Football for Dummies_ which preceded _Cliques and Chicks_ and _Aliens 101._ He frowned, picking up _Whodunit 5_ and then _Harry Potter._

"Looking for something?"

Ulquiorra dropped_ The Complete History of the Housefly_ and looked up. Standing there was a boy with black hair that curled at the ends and headphones. In one hand he clutched a cell phone. He looked to be about Inoue's age, although he barely came up to Ulquiorra's shoulder.

"I'm Kojima Mizuiro, I work here at the bookstore because my parental unit thinks I need to get out more," the boy said. "Can I help you?"

"I am looking for a romance novel," Ulquiorra told him. When the boy looked surprised, he added, "It's for my girlfriend. Orihime."

"I know someone named Orihime too," Kojima said, "Inoue Orihime. So, what kind of romance novel would you like? I meant, would she like, obviously. Ha-ha."

Ulquiorra was startled at hearing her full name escape from this boy's mouth. _He must be one of her friends from school_, Ulquiorra thought. "Do you have any that deal in…maybe, a couple in love, and then her forgetting him, and then somehow them getting back together despite this? She loves the angsty type."

The words that were falling from his mismatched lips startled even himself. He sounded like…_ a human._ He didn't like it.

"Yeah, we have a couple like that. Stay here and I'll get them."

Kojima disappeared inside the shop and Ulquiorra leaned back against the table. He stared straight ahead, watching the people that passed by, until the boy reemerged from the store.

"Here are three. The total is ¥14,980."

Just enough. Ulquiorra handed the boy the money and he smiled. "Arigato! See you around, stranger-san."

He went back inside the warm shop. Ulquiorra put the books in his pocket without even looking at the titles and continued down the street towards Inoue's apartment. He had one more thing to do before he went home.

He knew where she lived; she had told him her address one day in her ramblings, including how to get there from the grocery because that was a walk she complained she had to make far too often. He still remembered her sweet voice wondering about where all the food had gone and whether all of her stuffed animals came alive while she was asleep and had to eat. Then she had told him the story about how she had lost both her real key _and_ the one under the mat and had to squeeze through the window to see them both lying on the kitchen table, exactly where she had left them.

Her apartment came into view, and he stood back, looking at the building where she lived. It was painted a dark color, almost purple, and he could see four units from where he was standing: it was fairly small. A woman was outside watering plants. Ulquiorra went up to the gate, unlatched it and strode through.

Inoue's apartment was the top right one. Ulquiorra climbed the stairs, wishing Szayelaporro hadn't given him such tight pants. They did not stretch at all and they clung to his skin, much unlike his white hakama pants. _The sooner you get this done, the better, _he thought. He reached the top of the stairs and bent to retrieve Inoue's spare key, then inserted it into the lock and let the door swing open.

He stood on the threshold for a moment, almost afraid to enter her living space. The place where she had grown up, first with her brother and now alone. Then the smell wafted out to him, and with one sniff he was through the door and into the apartment, the door clicking shut behind him.

Even with the lights off, the place was bright. The walls were all painted happy colors – yellows, oranges, greens. There wasn't a whole lot of decoration, although she had a table and cabinets and a small refrigerator. Against one wall was a Soul Society telecommunicator –that's right, she had Soul Reapers staying with her. An intricate shrine was in one corner, which he assumed belonged to her brother Sora. Another door was in the wall, and he went to it and opened it wide.

Inside was her bedroom. He saw her bed, sheets still unmade, covers rumpled from the last time she had slept in it. Clothes were thrown helter-skelter about the room: a skirt, tank top, one shoe, a motley collection of dirty socks, a pink bra. He crossed to her bed and sat gently upon it, lowering his face to her pillow and inhaling her scent.

_The smell of rain and hibiscus flowers, of wet pine trees and dawn, and waterfalls and moss and that sweet aura that she carried with her._

He was about to stand when he noticed the small pink bear with the nametag sewn to the ear: _Enraku the Bear._ He picked it up and tucked it under his arm, and then left the bedroom, going back into the kitchen.

Ulquiorra opened a cabinet. Right in the forefront were the two things he was looking for: a brand new jar of red bean paste and a full tube of wasabi. He pulled them down from the shelves and was about to leave the house when he looked behind him and saw the shrine.

He set down the bear and the condiments and crossed to it, kneeling before the praying area and settling his eyes on her brother Sora. He picked up the frame and studied the man's soft smile, so much like her own.

He cleared his throat.

"Um…hello. I am Ulquiorra Schiffer. I don't expect you've ever heard about me," he said. "Well, maybe Orihime told you when we attacked for the first time. Yammy injured her quite badly."

He stopped and thought over his next move.

"We have your younger sister at Las Noches, which is the palace my master inhabits with his army of Arrancar. You may not know this, but Orihime possesses an amazing ability of rejection. She is one of the most powerful people I have ever met, and this includes my master as well as Kurosaki Ichigo. She probably downplays her abilities to you, but I assure you she is extremely talented. I suppose you know this from watching over her, which I am sure you are very diligent about. If I was her brother I know I would be.

"Something you should know about me is that I am in fact one of the Arrancar. An Espada, in fact, ranked 4 among ten. At this moment I am inside a gigai, which is a type of human body that we spiritual beings can temporarily inhabit to make ourselves visible to the average human. But I assure you I am a Hollow. In the flesh."

He took a deep breath.

"Another thing you should know about me is that I am very deeply in love with your sister Orihime. We have been torn apart by my master, Aizen Sôsuke, who did not wish me to be involved with her. Her memories of me were erased and she no longer knows who I am. I will not tell you all the ways your sister has opened my eyes as I do not think you would want to hear that from another man. However, I am unused to the emotions she brings with just the thought of her. The knowledge that I am to be stuck with these emotions for the rest of my days without her is too much to bear.

"Sora Inoue, I am asking you a favor. If you grant me this I vow to cherish Orihime until the breath leaves my body. If you can make some way for Orihime and I to be together once more, I will be forever in your debt. Please grant me your blessing. This is a lot of talking for me, so I am going to wrap it up now, but if there is any way to look past my monstrous nature and help me…then please, do so. Help us."

Ulquiorra sat with his eyes closed and his head bowed in front of the picture for a while longer. Eventually he stood, gathered up his things and reached inside his coat for the button.

The garganta opened before him, and he stepped through, back to Hueco Mundo, her smell tangled on his coat and in his hair and woven though his soul.

**!**

The garganta deposited him back into his room. He dumped the three books, stuffed bear, red bean paste and wasabi on his bed and quickly shed the uncomfortable World of the Living clothes. In the pocket of his jeans he found a small pill, which he swallowed. His body sprang from the gigai, which landed on the floor, generic and lifeless once again.

He dragged the body into his closet and let it slump to the floor. He'd return it to Szayelaporro later; he might need it again in the meantime. Then he quickly dressed and sat down at his desk to finish the letter.

_I went to the World of the Living on your behalf. While I was there I visited your apartment. With this letter please find a jar of red bean paste as well as a tube of wasabi, both of which I know you love. I doubt Barragan is feeding you exactly what you desire in terms of your quirky taste, so I took the effort to get these for you._

_Also, I conversed with your brother Sora by means of prayer. I told him all about us and asked for his help. Perhaps he will, perhaps he will not. Spirits are tricky._

_-UIquiorra._

Inside Ulquiorra's desk was a wooden box with a 4 inlaid into it. He removed the box and put in the bear, the letter, and the food, and then tucked it under his arm.

He'd find Tesla later. Right now, he had a package to deliver.

**So yeah...let me know. I kinda went out on a cliff here, so let me know what you think...:D**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: This would have been much earlier, but...FUCK CUSTOMS. America is great but the security here can kiss my ass.**

**No offense to Americans.**

**Plus: ...DISAPPOINTMENT. Who else read chapter 501 and was expecting to see our dear Neko-chan like me? (I have been fangirling all week, and that was like a total drop in adrenaline for me...) Anyway, this already late so without further ado...Doomed to Remember, Chapter 7~!**

_My sweet Orihime,_

_I have just gotten your last letter about how you got my letter. Did I really compare you to a lone rosebud in this desert wasteland? That is an accurate metaphor. I must have been feeling slightly poetic when I transcribed that._

_As for not being able to read my handwriting, I do not know what to tell you. I do not mean to sound conceited, but I have very nice writing, in my opinion. You used to think so as well, when you loved me. I do not remember what I was writing, but you came over without me noticing and watched me move the pen across the paper. After a while, you rested your hand on my shoulder and put your chin on my other shoulder, startling me. I looked over and you gave me a small kiss on the cheek._

"_I like your handwriting," you said to me. "It's very elegant."_

"_Thank you," I remember saying, because I was slightly flustered. No one had ever complimented my handwriting before. "I'm sure yours is nice too."_

"_It's not," you laughed. "I write very quickly, so my handwriting is very loopy and odd! When you look at it, it appears to have bunches of random lines and trails hanging about, but when you look closer everything's actually all there, just very sloppy."_

"_That is mysterious," I commented, laying my pen down. "I would think it would be very endearing."_

"_Endearing? What do you mean?"_

"_Everything about you fascinates me," I murmured. I reached up and laid one hand on yours, the one on my shoulder. With my other hand I cupped your cheek, and kissed your neck. "Now I can add your handwriting to that list."_

_After that we didn't do very much talking, but I assure you, it was not an awkward silence. _

_I think that not being able to read what I've written must be part of the enchantment. After all, you forgot about me…and it was not an accident. Anómino's memory-erasing-power must have tampered with that. I know you don't believe me when I tell you it was Anómino. I know you don't want to believe me. But how about you put it to the test? I believe you humans have a game called "truth or dare." Well, Orihime, I hope you don't like truth, because I dare you to ask Anómino what her power is. Go on, ask her what her zanpakuto's ability is. If she looks hesitant or scared to tell you, I'm right. If she makes up an excuse about why she can't tell you, I'm right. If she tells you something that doesn't seem like the truth, then I'm right. I can almost guarantee she won't want to tell you what her power is. After all, she did have to use it on you, and she doesn't want you to put two and two together. _

_Please don't call me cruel. I am desperate for you to figure out who I am. If you can find out who I am all on your own, then maybe we can be together again somehow. I am getting your letters; Halibel is delivering them to me. You can stop referring to me and your "secret admirer" as two different people, because we're not. We're the same person. And Orihime, imagine you're looking in my eyes right now, because that's the only way I can know you're not lying, but…do I sound like Tesla to you? Honestly…do I seem like the kind of person who would make a Yule Log? My culinary skills extend as far as omelettes and cereal. I can make lots of breakfast foods…but otherwise, I am a fool in the kitchen. So I stay away._

_I have a question for you. You know that Grimmjow is the 6__th__ Espada, right. So you must have figured out that the Espada are ranked in numbers, probably 1-10. In your next letter, can you list the names of all 10 Espada for me? I want to see if you know every one. Every. Single. Espada. Even the 4__th__ one._

_That is all._

_Amorously,_

_Ulquiorra Schiffer_

_Postscript: Did you enjoy your gifts?_

Ulquiorra folded up his latest letter with a strange sense of satisfaction fluttering in the pit of his stomach. He realized from Orihime's last letter than Anómino's power was making it impossible for her to read anything he wrote about himself that might trigger her memories. So he had made a game plan for himself. He'd pull it out of her, force her memories to the surface without actually revealing anything about himself. Besides his cooking skills, that is.

A sudden noise jolted him out of his thoughts. He pushed his letter into his pocket and frowned. It sounded like there was someone screaming, far away…

Suddenly his blood ran cold. He recognized that voice. _Orihime._

Every nerve in his body screamed to run to her, consequences be damned. But then he thought – _the consequence could be her death._

The next thing he thought was, _I have to find Grimmjow._

He was gone before he could think anything else.

* * *

"Aaayyyy, Ulquiorra-sama!"

Daisuke's obnoxious greeting make Ulquiorra's eyes roll without him even telling them too. His Fracción just had that kind of effect on him.

"Don't talk to him like that," Emiko chided, "can't you see he's busy."

Ulquiorra was, in fact, busy. Busy running. He didn't want to have a spike in spiritual pressure, and risk Aizen detecting him, so he opted to travel by foot versus Sonido. But now he was regretting that decision.

He could sense Grimmjow's Reatsu. The man was not staying still; he seemed to be running about all over the place like a chicken with its head cut off. Ulquiorra supposed it must have had something to do with the scream he had heard earlier.

_That scream_; he forced himself to go faster.

"Aayyy, where you going in such a hurry, Ulquiorra-sama?" Daisuke asked.

Ulquiorra waited for Emiko to tell her partner to mind his own business, but he was obviously not having any luck that day, because she stayed in an anticipatory silence.

"I'm going to investigate that scream I heard earlier," he said as calmly as he could.

There was a short silence.

"Who was it?" Emiko asked after a moment.

"I don't know," he lied, not wanting to explain it at that moment.

There was another short silence.

"You're lying," Emiko offered next.

"I am not," he lied again.

"Yes you are, if it was any old person you wouldn't bother," Daisuke informed him. "It must be something you don't want us to know about, otherwise you wouldn't have lied. It's also got to be really important, or else you wouldn't be running so fast. Also, I'm guessing that we're not the only ones who you don't want to know, because if you didn't care you'd be using Sonido."

There was another pause where all they could hear was the pounding of feet on the ground.

"Well, here I was, thinking you were an idiot," Emiko said, sounding slightly stunned.

"You weren't wrong," Ulquiorra said dryly.

They were getting close, just around the corner and –

Grimmjow sprinted past them, cradling Orihime in his arms. Anómino was riding on his back, clutching his shoulders. On her head was a white helmet from which sprouted tentacles that were suctioned to Orihime's scalp.

"Neechan! What's going on?" Emiko shouted.

"We're bringing Inoue-sama to the lab!" Anómino yelled back. As they disappeared around the corner, Ulquiorra could hear Grimmjow's voice float back to them: "Oy! Watch my eardrums, nada!"

"G-gomenasai!"

"The lab?" Daisuke said. The three of them had stopped, breathing heavily. "She didn't mean Szayelaporro-sama's lab, did she?"

"Probably," Ulquiorra said distractedly, his mind racing a mile a minute.

"Do you want us to Sonido there and see what's going on?" Emiko asked.

"Do what you want," Ulquiorra said.

"Hai!"

They flashed away, and Ulquiorra leaned hard against the wall. _What had happened? ! What made her scream like that? Why did Anómino have those tentacles on her head? And why on earth was Grimmjow with her? Why were they bringing her to Szayelaporro, of all people?_

Ulquiorra let his eyes slide closed. He had never felt more helpless. He couldn't even assist the woman he loved without endangering her life. Instead his colleague, _Grimmjow Jeagerjaques _of all people, was in charge of getting her medical attention from the resident lunatic.

Was he out of line, feeling like that was just a disaster waiting to happen?

There really was nothing he could do. He opened his eyes and looked around, wishing for something – _anything_, even Nnoitra would be welcome – to distract him from that jittery feeling in his stomach.

_How long does it take?_

"Ah…Ulqui-kun!"

Ulquiorra closed his eyes again briefly, gathering his patience. He had said than anything was welcome, but he had forgotten that Ichimaru Gin lived in Las Noches as well.

"Do you want something from me, Ichimaru-sama?" he murmured, so quietly he almost didn't hear it himself. He opened his eyes.

Gin's face was two inches away from his own. Despite that fact that his squinty eyes were shut tightly closed, Ulquiorra had the feeling that the man was studying his face.

He fought back the urge to jump in surprise.

"There's no need to be so formal, Ulqui-kun," Gin pouts, moving back a little and allowing his smile to fade. "Let's see…You should call me Gin-oji, just like your girlfriend. Wait, sorry, your _ex_-girlfriend.

Ulquiorra gritted his teeth. "I said, do you want something from me, Ichimaru-sama?"

"Aw, you won't play along, Ulqui-kun? Well, that's just like usual. Don't worry, I was just sayin' hi. I'll leave you to your brooding," Gin snickered, his smile returned to normal. He gave a friendly little wave. "Ta ta, Ulqui-kun. I hope your princess feels better."

Gin returned his hands to his sleeves and swayed on amiably, though he wasn't fooling anyone. He quickly rounded the corner and was out of sight. Ulquiorra leaned his head against the wall again, but rapid footsteps roused him once more. He looked around to see –

_Tesla Lindocruz_

-running down the hallway.

The blond man skidded to a stop in front of Ulquiorra and executed a quick bow. "Greetings, Ulquiorra-sama," he panted. "You wouldn't know where Orihime-sama is right now, would you?"

Inside his pockets, Ulquiorra's hands formed into fists.

"Because I think I heard her scream, but then I went to her room and she wasn't there, so now I'm trying to find her," Tesla added. "I'm worried about what happened back –"

Whatever he was about to say was lost to the ages, because Ulquiorra's fist connected with his face so hard his mouth seemed to slide over and a few of his teeth were knocked out. Tesla's one remaining eye rolled up into his head, and he slumped to the ground.

"I only give you what you deserve," he murmured.

He turned away from Tesla's unconscious form to see Emiko and Daisuke shimmer into view before him. Quickly he forgot about Nnoitra's Fracción in favor of what his own had to say.

Emiko and Daisuke fell on one knee, bowing, and then quickly jumped to their feet and saluted him. "Ulquiorra-sama, we have news."

"Well, tell it to me," Ulquiorra said. "What happened?"

"Orihime-sama's mind overloaded. Her memories of Soul Society were triggered, and she remembers being friends with them, even though Aizen said they were enemies. Or something," Emiko said. "All I know is that her returning memories caused her brain to freak out somehow, so Neechan had to put her back down under, and Grimmjow-sama had to take her to Szayelaporro-sama's lab."

_Her returning memories caused her brain to freak out somehow?_

Ulquiorra remembered the letter in his pocket, his plan to slowly tease the memories out of her. _I suppose that's out of the question now._ He'd give her this letter, but he wouldn't be writing any more like that in the future.

"Also, while we were there…Aizen was visiting her," Daisuke said nervously. "We told him we were visiting because we were her friends, but…It's probably better if you don't go right now."

Ulquiorra frowned. "How do you know I can't just waltz in while Aizen is in there?" he asked. "As far as you know, I can go see the woman whenever I feel like."

"Nuh-uh," Emiko said, shaking her head; "Grimmy-sama called her your girlfriend in there, and Aizen got 'displeased.' So we know there's something going on between the two of you."

Ulquiorra cursed under his breath. "Well, since your precious 'Grimmy-sama' seems to know everything, why don't you quit bothering me and go gossip with him," he asked, his voice monotonous. "I don't think Aizen will be with her for long. If I walk to the lab, the coast should be clear by the time I get to her."

He turned and began to walk away, pushing his hands back in his pockets. After a moment, he heard the two of them run to catch up.

"I have an errand for you," he begins, but then stops.

Down the hall, he can see a very familiar mane of orange hair. His feet stop in their tracks, his eyes lock on her hair.

But is it her? Her hair is the right color and length, but she's too short; her shoulders aren't broad enough. What's more is her uniform is not correct, and for some reason her hair is decorated by a bone-mask circlet.

The figure turns around and begins to hurry toward them. Ulquiorra does a double take when he realizes that the figure is Anómino. But for some reason, her hair is bright and firey, and her eyes are a warm gray instead of icy blue.

"Neechan!" Emiko calls out, "it hasn't worn off yet?"

Anómino catches up, and then stops right before them. Emiko goes to her and puts an arm around her small body, and Anómino sags against her sister in exhaustion.

"It should be beginning to," she said quietly. "But I had to use my power for a long time. It may last a little longer than usual. So I won't be visiting Inoue-sama today."

"What is going on here?" Ulquiorra asked, thoroughly confused but expertly controlling it.

"When Anómino uses her power on someone, she takes on a likeness of them," Daisuke explained. "Since she had to work with Orihime-sama, her hair and eyes have changed to look like Orihime-sama."

"Sometimes it can be helpful in a fight," Emiko added, "since the person you're attacking might hesitate when you resemble someone else, or even themselves. But in moments like these, it's kind of inconvenient."

Ulquiorra stood and absorbed this silently.

"So…your errand for us?" Emiko squealed suddenly.

"You sound far too excited. I assure you, it is just an errand."

"But it's the first one you've given us since we became your Fracción!" Daisuke rejoiced.

"Well, I was going to ask you to carry Tesla back to his quarters, but now I suppose I'll have you escort Anómino back to hers," Ulquiorra said, changing his mind on the spot. "After all, if Nnoitra finds him there…it will be an even better punishment."

Emiko and Daisuke seemed to notice Tesla lying on the floor for the first time.

"Wait…what is Nnoitra-sama's Fracción doing here?" Daisuke asked, sounding confused.

"He was in the wrong place at the wrong time," Ulquiorra said by way of explanation. "That man has made me angry recently, and I had to pay him back."

"OOH! I think that's like the karma thing we were talking about recently, right, Neechan, Daisuke?" Emiko mused. "Or like the Titanium Rule thing. Whatever it was called."

"The Golden Rule," Anómino corrected softly.

Emiko mussed her sister's hair. Ulquiorra saw that the roots were beginning to bleach back out. "That's my little sister for you. She's very smart, isn't she, Ulquiorra-sama?"

Anómino blushed and cringed away from Ulquiorra like she was expecting him to shout or hit her.

"He won't hurt you, he's just Ulquiorra-sama. Boring as can be," Emiko chided. "Now, let's go do our errand~! Come on, Neechan, this is so exciting~!"

Emiko dragged her sister away, while Daisuke pranced excitedly next to them. Ulquiorra closed his eyes and shook his head, then started walking towards Szayelaporro's lab.

He almost made it there without incident, but this time, the incident was more welcome than most. Ulquiorra stopped and nodded to Halibel.

"Hello," he said.

Halibel silently extended her hand, and Ulquiorra looked at it. In her palm was a small silver bracelet.

"This is the bracelet that you gave Orihime just before she came here to Hueco Mundo," she told him. "Aizen-sama insinuated that you were not to come here. But if you are wearing this bracelet, he will not know."

Ulquiorra looked at her. "I was under the impression that we had disabled the bracelet once Orihime was here," he asked her, confused.

"I enabled it again, with the help of my Fracción. It should last for about thirty minutes," she said. "It's already been five. Orihime's sedative should keep her under for the same amount of time. We cleared everyone out; only Grimmjow's left in the room. I'll keep watch for you."

Ulquiorra looked at her sideways. "You would do that for me?"

She looked surprised. "Of course I would. We discussed this already."

_It gives me hope to see someone like yourself blossom in such a way as you have since the arrival of Inoue Orihime._

Ulquiorra nodded and took the bracelet, slipping it on and shaking his sleeve over it. Then he gave a short bow to the woman, and slipped past her, into Orihime's room.

Grimmjow was sitting by Orihime's bed, but he looked up when Ulquiorra walked in and grinned. But Ulquiorra only had eyes for Orihime. He stood on the other side of her bed and placed a hand on her bed, near her shoulder.

"So what do you think of our little scheme?" Grimmjow grinned,

"Have you lost your mind? He will kill her." Ulquiorra shook his head and moved his hand to her shoulder, rubbing his thumb over her smooth skin as she slept.

"Shut your mouth emo-spada,you'rethe one who wanted to see her so badly," Grimmjow chortled.

"Not at the expense of her life!" Ulquiorra's voice rose a bit at this, and he hastily shut his mouth.

"Didn't you hear me bat bastard? Shut your freaking mouth! Halibel said that she'd give us a half hour. A. Half. Hour. Unless you want to wake her up, keep your voice down damnit," Grimmjow snarled, rising a little from his seat.

"…My apologies."

They fell into silence as Orihime stirred a little in her sleep. Ulquiorra shifted his hand to the back of her neck, stroking the spot behind her ear.

"Are you sure that it's safe to do this? Will they not sense my reatsu?" he murmured, his eyes focused on her sleeping face. She looks so tranquil…and peaceful. I could almost forget everything that happened right now.

Almost.

"How many times do I have to tell you, no? You're wearing that bracelet thingy that she wore when you kidnapped her from the Human world, remember? Jeez, and you tell me thatIdon't have a brain?"

Oh, right.

"Silence, Grimmjow, you are making too much noise."

"Oh. My. Kami. Why, I oughta…" Grimmjow let the sentence trail off and shook his head in disbelief.

Orihime's eyebrows furrowed, and her lip pushed out in a dreamy pout. I wonder what she's dreaming about? Probably a never-ending wasabi fountain or something…

"Hurry it up, we don't have much time left. From Halibel's stalling, and from the time left on that bracelet," Grimmjow told him.

Ulquiorra sighed and sat down on her bed, gingerly as not to wake her. His pale fingers combed through her fiery tresses, sliding up over her head until he could smooth out her furrowed brows with his thumb. He stroked her head softly, and she seemed to lean herself into his hand, like a kitten.

"Hello, Onna," he said, feeling slightly awkward. Grimmjow looked away and coughed. "How are you? I have heard that you gave everyone quite a scare. Are you alright?" He paused, and let a tiny smile grace his lips, a hiccup of a chuckle escape his throat. "Heh. Silly me. That's what you'd say, wouldn't you, Onna? Call me silly for worrying about you." Grimmjow caught his eye, and Ulquiorra instantly let his smile drop, not wanting Grimmjow to catch him. He changed tracks. "What happened, Onna? Why did you scream so?"

"Halibel thinks that her memories are coming back." Grimmjow said quietly. Ulquiorra looked up, his hand still running gently over her head. "Because she just lost her memory of you, and not of Berry-boy and the rest of her human friends."

"Meaning her memories of the incident are intact?" Ulquiorra confirmed, his eyebrows creasing beneath his mask.

"Yeah," Grimmjow said. His expression was hard, lined. "But apparently, the memory wipe effects things related to whatever got erased too. So you know how you threatened her friends? That's why she hasn't remembered everything accurately. The memory wipe had to 'rewire' the memories so that you wouldn't be in them, but still make sense to her. Or something like that."

"What?" Ulquiorra said, disbelieving.

"I'll fill you in on the details later, shouldn't you be doing something before, oh I don't know,we run out of time and get our asses caught?"

"...fine. I will wait for an answer. But you owe it to me, Grimmjow."

"Nii-san…?"

The voice that slipped from Orihime's lips was soft, tired, confused. Her eyebrows wrinkled again, and Grimmjow swore.

"Kuso! Hurry it up, will you? She's waking up,and we've only got five minutes."

Ulquiorra swallowed hard, not wanting to take his eyes from her beautiful face.

"It appears that I've run out of time, Orihime. There are so many things that I wish that I could tell you. So many things that I want to share. I'll settle on this for now, Onna."

Ulquiorra bent down and pressed his mismatched lips to the shell of her ear, kissing her softly as he stroked her cheek. "I will always fight for you." he whispered in her ear, quickly before she woke. "I will fight for you to be by my side. To watch the sunrise together, like how we did before. Wake up. Please, wake up Inoue Orihime. I don't know what I will do without you…"

His voice wavered and trailed off. Embarrassed, he sat up quickly and cleared his throat. He ran his hand over her face one last time, and then forced himself to stand and follow Grimmjow from the room, tearing his eyes unwillingly from her own fluttering lids as she started to wake.

Grimmjow lead the way silently toward Ulquiorra's room. They reached the door, and Grimmjow stood aside.

"You did not need to escort me," Ulquiorra said, his voice a little thick. He pushed the door open and went through. Grimmjow caught it before it could shut in his face and followed his pale friend inside. "I can walk here myself."

"I wanted to keep you company," Grimmjow admitted. He let the door shut and went over to the bed, grabbing Ulquiorra's pillow and lying on his side, hugging the pillow to his stomach as he looked up at Ulquiorra, who turned the desk chair around and sat in it.

"You did not need to," Ulquiorra restated.

"No one needs to be alone at a time like this," Grimmjow said. Ulquiorra stared at him.

"Are you feeling okay? Do you have a fever?"

"Like you would care if I did," Grimmjow scoffed.

"Well, you're lying on my bed, after all. _I_ don't want to be sick," Ulquiorra said.

"'Course you don't, fucker," Grimmjow sniggered.

They sat in silence for a moment, then Ulquiorra raised his eyes to Grimmjow again. Their gazes met.

"Thank you," he murmured.

Grimmjow was quiet for a moment longer, then he scowled. "You don't need to get sentimental on me. You know I'm not into this sappy shit."

The silence stretched on, but it was comfortable. It wasn't forced or awkward.

"You heard that Kurosaki's here, right?" Grimmjow asked after a moment.

"Of course," Ulquiorra said. "I expect that Aizen will be calling a meeting any time now." He cut his eyes at Grimmjow. "You're not thinking about doing anything rash, are you?"

"Why?" Grimmjow sneered. "Worried?"

"I don't know what would give you that idea."

Grimmjow hugged the pillow tighter and rolled onto his back, staring intently at the ceiling. "I don't think so. I mean, I need more information before I go. I'm pretty pissed at the berryhead, but I have other priorities." He glanced at Ulquiorra, who nodded once, then returned his gaze to the ceiling. "But you never know what happens. It all depends on what the little fucker does. You know?"

"Yes."

They both sat quietly, each lost in their own thought.

"You really love her, don't you," Grimmjow commented finally.

Ulquiorra cut his eyes at Grimmjow, but didn't say anything. He didn't think Grimmjow was asking because he didn't know the answer.

"I mean, your relationship isn't just making out all over the place," Grimmjow said. "There's emotion involved. You know, like she's the one you'd want to settle down with, if we all survive this crazy war."

Ulquiorra remained silent, but his mind was racing.

"You know, like if we were human, you'd move into her apartment, you'd pray with her, you'd make her breakfast in bed, maybe you'd even have a kid or two," Grimmjow said. "You sure got dealt a fucked up hand, Ulquiorra. It could have been beautiful between you two."

"Are you trying to make me want things I can never have," Ulquiorra snapped. "Don't you know that being with her for the rest of my life is exactly what I want?"

"But in a way, you're lucky," Grimmjow said, ignoring him. "You really found the right person. Someone who you'd pick up their dirty underwear off the floor. Someone who you'd sit on your knees on the floor for an hour to talk to a dead person for. Someone you'd wake up early to cook for. Someone who you'd screw not just for fun, but because you really wanted to start something. You followin' me?"

Ulquiorra bit his tongue and looked away, trying not to imagine it, because it made his heart hurt.

"I mean, I probably won't ever get a chance like that," Grimmjow added.

"Don't say that," Ulquiorra finally said. "You listen to me, Grimmjow Jeagerjaques," he started in his flat voice, "When we get done with this war against the Shinigami that's what's going to happen. Me and Inoue are going to live together and she's going to remember everything, and even if she doesn't it's okay because we'll make lots of new memories. And you are going to live with the woman you loved, and still do, you just don't know it, and we are going to have the greatest life ever and Aizen Sôsuke will be dead and he won't care."

Grimmjow looked thoughtful.

"Is that an offer, Ulquiorra Schiffer?" he asked.

"It's a promise," Ulquiorra said firmly.

Grimmjow rolled to the very edge of the bed and put out one hand. "Shake on it?"

Ulquiorra put out his hand, and the two men clasped hands and shook once.

"Deal?" Grimmjow asked.

"Deal."

**So...let me know what you think. Also, I don't know if I mentioned this, but I started a GrimmNel entitled "Before You Faded" so check it out. Thank you very much...Also hit up moonlightrurouni's side, Cursed to Forget, because I keep forgetting to remind you guys... lol**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: So…news, you say. I have news. I have a lot of news :D First news is, my hair is now pinker than Natsu Dragneel's. I feel very accomplished. It looks like a giant candy cane. Stripes and the like. It is awesome. Second news is, the day you are reading this is my first day of school. I am writing this in advance so it hasn't actually happened yet, but by the time I post this it will have happened. Hopefully I will still be alive (I'm switching schools and my new school is about 20 times bigger than my old one). Third news is, I'm reading Naruto for reasons that I am not disclosing and it's alright but I'm not very far into it yet so I'm hoping it gets better. Fourth news is, there is no fourth news, but I just had to get to 4 because that's Ulquiorra's number :D**

**(I SURVIVED!)**

"_I love you," he whispered into her ear._

"_I love you too," she whispered back, and they were content. They fell asleep in each other's arms that night, and when the morning finally came he rose to make her breakfast in bed. He gazed at her sleeping form, her hair across her pillow, and then went downstairs to fry some bacon…_

_That had been a month ago, and now she was gone and he didn't know where. It killed him, every day. Every second. He paced around the house in his pajamas, sat down on the kitchen floor and put his back against the fridge and his head in his hands. She was never coming back, even though he loved her so much. He was sure that wherever she was now, she still loved him too. Was sure that she was watching over him –_

Ulquiorra rolled his eyes and tossed the book aside. So the guy's lover was dead. He did not care. It didn't relate to his problem at all.

He picked up the next book, glancing briefly at the cover. _Doomed to Remember,_ it read. He shrugged. The title did not affect him. It didn't influence the story at all.

He opened it and began reading.

_To the very end, it was her boss that came between them, and that was something that Mai regretted every day of her life. From the moment he laid eyes on Hiro he was determined to tear the two apart, to split them from their core. Why, Mai did not know. Maybe her boss felt that if she had a boyfriend she wouldn't be able to concentrate on her job. It didn't matter. She was stuck in a contract, a strong contract, binding her to him for who knows how long. The penalty for breaking this contract was a price far higher than she was willing to pay, for it would result in the love of her life ceasing to live. _

_So now, she was stuck in the clutches of an evil boss that separated her from the one thing she desired. He would send her on business trip after business trip, so that she would have barely a few hours between each flight with which to spend her time, and this would be usually spent at his house, in his bed. They could not go out together, her boss had eyes everywhere. Although Hiro never put pressure on her to quit, to urge her to escape the man and flee the country together, she could tell it was what he wanted. It was what she wanted as well. But such was the extent of her love that she could never endanger Hiro that way. For to lose her Hiro was to lose herself._

_They had been dating for only a week when she brought him to that fateful work social function. Only a week, but she was already more in love with him than she had ever been with any other man. It showed on her face; she quite literally glowed. Every now and then she would reach up and give Hiro a little kiss on the cheek. It was one of those times that the boss saw them, and then –_

Ulquiorra's door burst open, and Grimmjow leaped into the room. Ulquiorra looked up from his book, a shadow of irritation crossing his face.

"Do you require something, trash. I am busy."

"Yeah, I damn well do need something," Grimmjow panted. "Princesa is not in her quarters, and I didn't authorize anyone to take her."

Ulquiorra's brows drew a smidgen together. "Orihime?"

Grimmjow gave an angry snort. "No, fucking Zommari. _Of course _Orihime."

Ulquiorra dropped the book on his desk and stood calmly. He closed his eyes and put his hands carefully in his pockets. "Not my problem. She is no longer my responsibility, Sexta."

He turned away from the stunned Grimmjow and picked up his blade, sliding it into his belt. "I would appreciate if you would remove yourself from my quarters. I have things to do."

"Things like what?" Grimmjow snarled, clamping one hand on Ulquiorra's thin shoulder. "Things like making sure your girlfriend isn't _dead_?"

Ulquiorra stopped short. He turned his head towards Grimmjow and, without opening his eyes, said coolly, "I have no _girlfriend._ The woman that you speak of is no longer in my care. If she is dead, then it is your fault, since she is now being looked after by you. And, if she is dead, you can be sure that you will be punished accordingly."

Grimmjow was silent for a moment as his brain processed the hidden threat behind Ulquiorra's words, and then a smile smeared across his face. "So you _do_ care," he taunted.

"Remove your hand from my person."

"Don't change the subject, Ulquiorra," Grimmjow said, the smile gone as soon as it had come.

"I do not think you understand." Ulquiorra sonido'ed away from Grimmjow, finally feeling anger. "There is nothing I can do. If I go near her, if I try to make contact with her, _she will die._ Can you understand the position I am in, _Grimmjow?_ No matter how much I may desire to help you, _there is nothing I can do!"_

"Well, for starters, you can remove the stick from your –"

Grimmjow was cut off as the door was again opened, and both men turned to see Halibel's Fracción Apache standing there. One hand was on her hip, and she had a pompous scowl on her face, but her eyes were fearful.

"Halibel-sama sent me to tell you two that Inoue-sama's reiatsu has disappeared," she announced.

Ulquiorra opened his eyes.

"Where is Halibel right now?" he asked Apache.

"Heh, that caught your interest," Grimmjow sniggered under his breath, but Ulquiorra ignored it.

"Follow me," Apache said.

She lead them to Halibel's quarters, where they let themselves in. Halibel was sitting in a chair at her desk, looking at a big screen. One finger tapped it anxiously, her face lighting up different colors as the view changed. Mila Rose and Sun-Sun were hovering behind her.

All three women looked up as Ulquiorra, Grimmjow, and Apache entered the room. Halibel visibly slumped in relief when she saw Ulquiorra.

"What's going on here?" Grimmjow demanded.

"We are trying to track down Orihime's spiritual pressure with this commuter – compuner – com – thing," Halibel said quietly. "But so far we've gotten absolutely zero results."

Grimmjow frowned. "Is it possible that it's broken?"

"We got it from Szayelaporro," Mila Rose said. "So unless you're saying that he screwed up somehow, then it's probably fully functional."

"Can you try to find Anómino's spiritual pressure?" Ulquiorra asked calmly.

Halibel didn't bat an eyelash. "Of course," she murmured, turning back to the device. After a few moments of tapping, her eyes narrowed as though she was frowning, and she shook her head.

"So Anómino must be with Orihime, wherever they are," Ulquiorra murmured.

"You don't think they're d-!"

_Attention all Espada. Aizen-sama is calling a meeting. Espada Primera through Ultima please assemble in the meeting hall._

Ulquiorra, Grimmjow, and Halibel all looked up at the sudden message echoing in their heads. Grimmjow cursed.

"Kuso! Could they have _picked_ a _worse_ time? !"

"What is it?" Sun-Sun asked, bringing her sleeve to her face.

"Director-General Tôsen just called an Espada meeting," Halibel said grimly. She slid out of her seat gracefully and stood, brushing her hair from her eyes. "We have to go, no matter how inconvenient it is. Girls, please continue the investigation while we are gone."

Ulquiorra followed Grimmjow and Halibel out the door while Mila Rose, Apache, and Sun-Sun squabbled about who got to sit in the seat. They walked quietly towards the meeting room, each deep in thought. _Except Grimmjow, probably,_ Ulquiorra mused as they entered a dark hallway.

"Don't mention this in the meeting, everyone," Halibel reminded them quietly.

"Naturally." Ulquiorra glanced at Grimmjow, who scowled.

"Tch. Like I'd do something like that."

"Something like what?" Nnoitra's lecherous voice drifted to Ulquiorra's ears. He rolled his head slowly around and glanced at the lanky Espada, who was lounging on the wall. He detached himself and strolled up to them, dim light dancing off his features.

"None of your business, Quinta."

"Touchy," he leered.

"My, my, Nnoitra. Picking on poor Ulquiorra again? How dishonorable." Szayelaporro joined them, tossing his bubblegum locks.

"Speak for yourself," Nnoitra spat, "and stay out of other people's business, _Octava._"

"I know what my rank is, thank you very much," Szayelaporro said smoothly.

A loud yawn alerted them to Starrk's presence as he approached the group, running a hand through his hair, tousling it further. "Lilinette woke me up," he grumbled sleepily. "And then the Director-General woke me up again. This better be good."

"Be careful, Primera. Those words could border on treason," came Zommari's dark voice, like smooth chocolate. He was difficult to see in the darkness.

"Every other thing I say borders on treason in your book," Starrk yawned.

"What book?" Yammy's voice floated down from above. Ulquiorra groaned inwardly.

"Not a real book, fool." Szayelaporro's voice was scathing. "Your lack of intellect astounds me."

"You're all fools," Barragan's voice informed them.

"Is everyone…"

"…here?" the two voices of Aaroniero asked.

"Reckon so," Nnoitra said.

"So what's this about?" Starrk asked, yawning again behind his hand.

"I believe we have intruders," Grimmjow volunteered.

"Intruders?" asked Yammy with interest as they entered the meeting room and began filing to their high-backed seats.

"Underground passage number twenty two has self-destructed," Zommari intoned.

"Oh?" Barragan asked with mild surprise. "They picked an awfully far-away spot to break in."

"You can say that again," Szayelaporro remarked with bubbly disappointment. "It would've been fun if they'd broken right into the throne room."

Nnoitra pushed back his chair with an awful _screech_ and flung himself into it, his weapon rattling. "Ha ha!" he laughed. _"Excellent!"_

Starrk pulled back his chair and slumped into it, laying his head on the table and yawning hugely. "Shut up," he ordered half-heartedly, "I'm trying to sleep over here. Stop screaming."

The doors at the opposite end of the meeting room cranked open, and light spilled into the room. Ulquiorra closed his eyes against the sudden onslaught on his pupils. He didn't need to see what was happening. He knew Aizen was about to enter, flanked by Gin and Tôsen, and he didn't want to see the self-satisfied smirk on his master's face just yet.

"Good morning, Espadas," Aizen greeted them. All the Espada turned toward their master. "We've been invaded," he added nonchalantly, "but first, some tea."

Aizen glided to his seat at the head of the table, next to Ulquiorra, and lowered himself into it. One of the Números came forward and poured eleven cups of tea, which were deposited before each Espada. It was totally silent in the room.

"Does everyone have a cup?" Aizen asked after everyone had been served, which was a question that was both redundant and rhetorical. "All right, then…please listen to me while you enjoy your tea."

Ulquiorra picked up his teacup and held it in both hands, letting the warmth seep through him. He raised it carefully to his lips and sipped at it, but then held it before his face and let it warm his skin.

"Kaname," Aizen intoned. Ulquiorra noticed Gin and Tôsen standing behind their master. "The picture, please."

"Yes, my lord."

Tôsen pulled down a lever in the wall. On the table in front of Ulquiorra, a big hole appeared. From it projected an image of three figures running across the sand. Ulquiorra could see Grimmjow's disinterested face, distorted through the image, across from him.

"There are three intruders," Aizen said calmly. "Uryû Ishida, Yasutora Sado, and Ichigo Kurosaki."

At the mention of Ichigo's name, Grimmjow's eyes widened dramatically. Ulquiorra frowned a little bit. _He already knew Kurosaki was here, why is he so surprised? The fool._

"That's the enemy?" Aaroniero asked, his voice completely surprised.

"Pssh…you said it was an enemy raid!" Barragan said. "Those are just kids."

"They look so…boring," Szayelaporro said delightedly.

Yammy scowled. Ulquiorra sipped his tea.

"Don't underestimate them," Aizen warned. "They were among the ryoka that invaded Soul Society and defied the thirteen court guard companies."

"There were four then. They're one short this time," Zommari observed. "Who's missing?"

Ulquiorra blurted her name before he could stop himself. "Orihime Inoue," he said, then felt Aizen glance at him with amused interest.

No one else seemed to notice. "So they've come to rescue their friend." Nnoitra was clearly thrilled. "I like it! But they look weak…"

"Are you deaf?" Halibel asked contemptuously. "You were _just_ warned not to underestimate them."

"I didn't mean like that," Nnoitra said, and his hate for her was apparent in his voice. "Don't get your panties in a bunch. Are you afraid of them or something?"

_Sexist trash._

Before anyone else could say anything, Grimmjow stood abruptly. Ulquiorra looked at him in surprise; his eyes were full of hate. He began to walk away without a word.

"Where are you going, Grimmjow?" Tôsen asked dangerously.

"I'm gonna kill 'em," Grimmjow vowed. "They're vermin. The sooner they're exterminated, the better."

"Lord Aizen hasn't given you your orders yet. Sit down."

"I'm going to kill them _for_ Lord Aizen," Grimmjow reminded him.

"Grimmjow."

Aizen's voice allowed no argument. Grimmjow turned sullenly.

"…Yes?"

"Your enthusiasm is appreciated, but I haven't finished talking yet. Please sit down."

Grimmjow hesitated.

"What's that?" Aizen asked pleasantly. He turned in his seat and looked Grimmjow dead in the eye. "I didn't hear you…_Grimmjow Jeagerjaques."_

Suddenly Aizen raised his spiritual pressure around Grimmjow, intensifying the pressure around the blue-haired man. His eyes widened, and with a strangled croak, he fell to his knees, sweat pouring down his face.

"Good," Aizen said, straightening himself in his chair, "Now we understand each other."

Grimmjow, panting on the floor, was silent.

"Now then," Aizen continued, "as you can see, three enemies have arrived. I wouldn't underestimate them, but there's no need for excessive alarm either. I want all of you to return to your palaces and go about your business as usual. Don't be overconfident, and don't be reckless. Just wait for the enemy. And don't be afraid." He extended his hand towards them. "No matter what happens…as long as you're with me, no one can defeat you."

He stood, smiling pleasantly. Ulquiorra set down his tea, which had been reduced to cold dregs.

"You are dismissed," Aizen said, and everyone stood. Halibel joined Ulquiorra and sighed.

"That accomplished nothing," she murmured to him.

Ulquiorra closed his eyes in acceptance and turned to Grimmjow, still lying on the floor.

"Fool," he said, "you knew Kurosaki was here."

"Seeing him…I guess I must have overreacted," Grimmjow panted on the floor. He scowled. "I want to kill that bastard, seriously –"

He stopped in surprise when Ulquiorra extended his hand towards him. Shocked, Grimmjow looked at Ulquiorra's face. He was turned away, his eyes closed.

"Get up," he said. "We are getting nothing done with you lying there like a weakling."

Uncertainly, Grimmjow took Ulquiorra's hand. The smaller, pale man hauled him to his feet and dropped his hand like a hot potato.

"You are sweaty," Ulquiorra remarked, turning on his heel. "Let's go."

**Ok...I want to make this comment, today in math class there was this kid, and when he got called for roll he was all like, "I prefer to go by The Esteemed Condor."**

**...**

**Yeah it was really funny hahahaha :D now go over to Moony's and don't forget to RnR! And check out my GrimmNel too (maybe) (please) (:D)**


	9. Chapter 9

**Hey- I've had a maddening Ulquihime plot bunny racing around my head for the past 24 hours or so, and so this chapter is going to be pulled out kicking and screaming.. I'm not even sure what it's going to be about yet. I guess I'll just kind of play it by ear..**

* * *

Back in Halibel's quarters, the three Espada, as well as Halibel's Fracción were about to call it a day. They had had an exhausting hour or so after the meeting frantically trying to locate the reatsu of both Orihime and Anómino and it was failing pretty miserably. Everyone wanted to just flop down on a bed and moan loudly. But no one's pride actually allowed them to, except Apache, who then commenced to doing it. This triggered a whole new round of arguing, and right now, Ulquiorra did not have the patience for it. He rose swiftly from his seat and exited the room without a sound, letting the door click shut behind him.

He backed up to the wall and let the back of his head thud against it, closing his eyes as he bared his throat to the world. He inhaled through his nose, letting the air flow through his body, rejuvenating him. Restoring him.

If only he could restore everything with just a deep breath. Inside, Halibel and her cronies were scrambling to find the reatsu of his Onna. And for what? So that he could be certain she was alive; still out of reach, yes, but alive? A temptation hovering over him like the devil on his shoulder, crooning into one delicate white ear? Like the very last cookie in the jar or that one shirt that belongs to your sister, that thing you know you shouldn't take. That's what she was, that was what her potential could be, the deadliest sin. How easy it would be to just go back to her, like a schoolboy falling back into his warm bed on a winter morning. But he had to rise, dress himself, gather his books and go to his lessons, feeling that longing for his warm sheets all day long somewhere inside him, not quite knowing what he wanted until he could come home, kick off his shoes and fall back to his mattress with an _Aah…_of realization, _this_ is what I wanted, _this _is that longing.

Was that really so much to ask? Would the weekend ever come, where he would be allowed to sleep in, rise from his sheets at his leisure? Was he to trundle to school every morning without break, until he could no longer bear to part with those warm, comforting blankets? Even worse, if he was pulled away from that sunset-haired goddess, every morning, and leaving her to wake up alone?

So many questions that he was unable to answer. It left Ulquiorra feeling slightly depressed. He ran a hand through his black hair, his pinky sliding over the smooth helmet that rested there.

Hearing the door open, Ulquiorra blinked and pushed himself gently off of the wall to face Halibel, who emerged slowly from the room. She met his gaze silently and handed him an envelope, which he accepted.

"I didn't want to give it to you in all that chaos," she murmured.

Ulquiorra nodded and drew his own letter from his uniform, handing it to her. She took it and disappeared back inside.

Ulquiorra broke the seal on the letter and unfolded it. The first thing he noticed were blots on the page where she had pressed the pen to the paper for far too long, letting the ink spread and wet the paper. He then noticed that her writing was sloppy, messier than usual, as if it had been written in a fit of rage, so unlike her usual self. He could even spot all-capital words and underlines and multiple exclamation points, as well as places where she had retraced the letters with a harsh hand, over and over and over until the paper was indented under his fingers.

As he read it, he felt despair fill him.

Now she hated him.

Clutching the paper tightly in his hands, he closed his eyes once more, drawing in another deep breath. When he opened his eyes once more, however, her furious accusations still pinned him down, cursing his existence from the bottom of her soul, from the deepest chasm of her heart.

A deep breath wasn't going to fix anything this time.

He resisted the urge to crumple the letter into his hand and took one more deep breath. In this kind of situation, there was but one more entity he could consult.

_Murciélago._

* * *

Consulting with Murciélago always required extreme concentration. His sword was proud and very judgemental. If Ulquiorra did not have the exact right mindset, his sword would often ignore him, leaving him frustrated and mad. Sometimes the blade would lock him out for days if he did something Murciélago did not approve of.

He sat on his bed and folded his legs "criss-cross applesauce" as the Onna would say, laying his sword carefully across his knees. He then placed his palms over his knees, so that the blade ran between.

He closed his eyes and inhaled, letting his chest expand. Breathing out, he felt the tickle of currents against his skin, feeling feathery, that sensation of being so completely submerged that you can't even tell you're wet.

He let his eyes slide slowly open, seeing the green-blue underwater world he found himself in. With one graceful movement, he stood, taking in his surroundings. The ground under him, sandy dirt, billowed in the water with each small movement, each step disrupting and making clouds around his knees before settling again. Around him stood ruins of a Greek-era city, crumbling buildings that had water algae climbing up the sides, mossy tendrils weaving in the currents. Each window had a fuzzy green outline, rocks on the ground and a very old fountain all were covered with a greenish tinge. Small water weeds grew from the sandy ground, waving in the current.

Ulquiorra took a step toward the city, and noticed with irritation that Murciélago had shifted him to his final form, as the blade was wont to do when he visited his inner world. He flicked his long, whiplike tail in annoyance and folded his large wings against his back. Behind him, his tail stirred up the sand, and it settled slowly back to the ground.

Ulquiorra made his way to an underwater pavilion, the watery ceiling being blocked from view. Instead of sand beneath his taloned feet, he was now walking on ages-old cement, cracked in places, eroded at the corners, tiny plants growing from the imperfections splintering across it. Columns with chunks missing from the sides unsteadily supported the arch of the porch, and the sides of the ceiling boasted old paintings directly on the surface that had traces of color left, by now mostly washed away, but the occasional bright spot remaining amongst the greenish world. As he walked down the concrete, he could see into the rooms of the building that was lined by this porch; most were empty save for one decoration – a table that was set for ten with glasses, silverware and plates that had long since been covered with algae, a wardrobe hanging open with threads spilling out, a workbench covered with rusted tools. At the last room he stopped, knowing that this was where his sword would be, and observed the figure in the room for a moment before announcing himself.

Inside the room a figure sat before a piano, the keys browned and one leg shorter than the rest, the supporting stand holding up the top covered in a solid layer of moss. The figure's back was to him, but he knew that it was Murciélago. Black hair flowing down solidly save for one side, where the strands were shaved close to the head near the ear, which had been pierced several times. A corset bound the figure's back tightly, lacing up the back and flowing out from the waist in a skirt with many layers as thin as onion skin. The dress was made of fifty shades of green, blending in with the environment. Despite the fact that there were no soft grounds here, there were no shoes on the figure's feet, delicate ankles trimmed by a small bracelet. Toes were turned in at the joint of the foot and calf, curled under as if in preparation for some dance. But though Murciélago was seated before a piano, she had a violin mounted under her left ear, which was hidden behind her black hair. A bow moved solidly up and down over the four strings, save for the D, which had popped long ago and now left curled wires floating about over the bridge and fingerboard.

The melody that Murciélago was playing was difficult for Ulquiorra to hear, because the acoustics in his inner world were awful. However, he could hear when she lifted her bow and spun to face him, her green eyes glaring.

Her hair trailed over one ear, almost hiding her left eye but not quite. She had a small nose and lips that were unpainted, eyes that were unbrushed. Her skin was smooth, not baring a single freckle or mole. Her dress was sleeveless and left her shoulders bare, although her left breast was peppered with tattoos; the most conspicuous being a large 4 placed on the same location as Ulquiorra's himself. A necklace looped around under her hair and was draped over her collarbones, with a bat wing pendant hanging from it. Her dress worked to contain her breasts, and her waist was small, from what you could see under the billowy skirt.

"You interrupted me," she accused him, her voice floating across the water.

He shrugged, his pale shoulders rising and falling with the movement. "It is an important matter. I need advice."

Murciélago sighed and laid down her violin, the back plunking against the keys. The sound that came from it was chaotic, jarring against the beautiful violin from earlier. She pushed back the piano bench and stepped carefully over it, her dress floating about her knees as her pointed toe landed on the concrete floor. Ulquiorra watched her, bracelets sliding on her arms, rings glittering on her thin fingers.

Behind her, two large bat wings shimmered into view, and she shook them out and then folded them behind her, watching with interest as the currents made pebbles bounce around on the ground and the fur on Ulquiorra's body blow back. She lifted one hand, ran black fingernails through her hair, pushing it to the side. "Is it about that girl?"

A slight crease appeared between Ulquiorra's eyebrows. "She has a name."

"So that's a yes?"

"Do you always deflect attention from yourself with a question?"

"I don't know, do I?" Murciélago's mouth spread into a smile. She laughed, bubbles spewing from her lips. "You're funny, Ulquiorra. You should visit me more often. I get really lonely here, you know."

Abruptly she stopped laughing and frowned, picking up a black leather jacket from the piano bench. She shrugged it on over her sleeveless dress, unfurling her wings through slits in the back. She ran her hands over her upper arms, shivering, and glared at Ulquiorra again.

"Why do you always have to make the water so cold when you come here?" she grumbled.

"You irritate me."

She frowned deeper. "That's not a nice thing to say to someone who you need advice from."

Ulquiorra padded over to the piano bench and sat gingerly on it, flicking his tail briefly across the keys. Murciélago faced him, tapping her fingers impatiently on her arms, her stance defiant.

"Why must you dress that way? You look like an American. I don't like it."

She flipped her hair. "I can dress how I like. It's not like there's anyone around here to see me, ever. You're not my _dad_, Ulquiorra."

"Thank Aizen."

"Look, can we get to the point? What, exactly, do you want me to say to you?"

Ulquiorra allowed his shoulders to slouch a little. "I need help," he admitted grudgingly, closing his golden eyes, shutting off his green sclera and diamondlike pupils.

She smirked. "Help with what now?"

"Help with the Onna." Ulquiorra grit his teeth.

"First step: don't call her by that derogatory nickname. How would _you _like it if someone called you The Man?"

Ulquiorra had to admit that if someone went around calling him that, he would probably get very angry with them.

"It's not that, that I need help with," he said. "You live inside me, so I'm sure you're aware of what happened."

The water was starting to warm up again. Murciélago shrugged off her jacket and draped it over the bench next to Ulquiorra.

"Yeah, pretty much," she said. "Up to where? You writing her that last letter that made her so mad? If I was you, I'd pretty much drop her pretty ass now. See, she was pretty rude to you, you know. I'm not down with that."

"It does not matter. What should I do? That's what I need to know."

Murciélago sighed. She pivoted around, the small movement causing the dress to flare up around her thighs, each piece of viridian onion skin fluttering individually. "You need to treat her like a woman," she said. She pulled all her hair over one shoulder and began to work it into a braid, her fingers fast in her black locks. "You need to apologize for what you said."

"But I didn't even do anything wrong."

"She's probably confused as to what to think. Maybe you should back off a little, maybe even write her an apology letter and then let her cool off a little. Let her write you back saying she forgives you. And then just…switch topics for a bit."

"Switch topics to _what?_"

She rolled her eyes. "I don't know. Anything. Ask her what her friends are like."

"But I don't care about her friends. They are idiotic trash."

Murciélago bounded over to him and put her hands on his shoulders. "Listen to yourself!" she yelled in his face. _"Listen to yourself!_ You are so stubborn! All you want is for her to remember what you had. Did you ever even _think_ about the fact that maybe, just _maybe_, you could get her to fall for you again? Huh? Did that ever occur to you, you baka Ulquiorra? Huh?"

Ulquiorra grimaced and pushed her away. "If you were anyone else, you would be a pile of ash right now."

_"Were you even listening to me? !"_

"If that happened, we would be back at square 1."

"Fine then! Fine! Come to me for advice, and then don't follow it! Fine!"

Ulquiorra sighed in exasperation. "Don't you have any other advice?"

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, her green corset expanding as she did so. "Here is my advice. Back the fuck off, Ulquiorra. You're forcing things on her that she obviously doesn't want to think about, so as a defense she's pushing you away. Ask her about things she wants to talk about. Her brother, her friends, whatever. Anómino. Then, slowly, ease back into the topic again. Do that, and you should be set to go."

Ulquiorra stood. "Are you sure?"

"Positive." Murciélago nodded. "Now you should get going. You need to get started on that apology letter."

In one bound she had reached him and flung her arms around him, resting her head against his chest for a moment. She closed her brilliant green eyes, and then opened them and looked up at him with a smile.

"See ya," she said, and smacked his butt.

Ulquiorra was gone before he could wring her slender neck.

* * *

When he opened his eyes, he was surprised to see that Murciélago's jacket was folded neatly on his bed with a note pinned to it. On top of it was a large bouquet of yellow-orange flowers.

_Forgot to give you this. It's for Chica, with my love. Pass this on to her with your 'I'm Sorry' note and a big armload of flowers! Girls love flowers!_

_-M._

He shook his head and set down the note. Somehow he could see Orihime snuggling into the leather jacket. He got up and went over to his writing desk.

_My sweet Orihime,_

_I am so very sorry for my last letter. I am not going to make any excuses for my incessant probing. What I was trying…actually, I said I wouldn't make any excuses. I hope you actually read this letter, I hope you aren't too angry with me. Please, find it in your heart to forgive me somehow. _

_This jacket is from Murciélago, with love._

_I will not ask you any more questions about myself. It is now clear to me that you have no intention of regaining what we once had. I shall try to put you out of my mind. Unless you say otherwise, this will be my last letter to you._

_Amorously,_

_Ulquiorra, Espada number 4._


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: Hello all. I'm sorry about the no update last week, but Moony had a sudden, strong desire to camp...or something...so we held off, she went and gallivanted about in a tent 'neath the stars, and here we are...**

**If anyone would like to know how MY life is going, I'll give it to you in two short sentences: 1) Dragon*Con, the largest cosplay convention in the world which was last weekend and is coincidentally located in my hometown, and 2) My birthday was on Sunday and I turned an odd number. The end. Luffs to everybody.**

_My sweet Orihime,_

_I am so very sorry for my last letter. I am not going to make any excuses for my incessant probing. What I was trying…actually, I said I wouldn't make any excuses. I hope you actually read this letter, I hope you aren't too angry with me. Please, find it in your heart to forgive me somehow._

_This jacket is from Murciélago, with love._

_I will not ask you any more questions about myself. It is now clear to me that you have no intention of regaining what we once had. I shall try to put you out of my mind. Unless you say otherwise, this will be my last letter to you._

_Amorously,_

_Ulquiorra, Espada number 4._

Ulquiorra glanced over his letter one last time before he nodded quietly to himself, folding the paper up and taking the flowers and jacket from the bed. Tucking all the items under his arm, he set off for Halibel's quarters.

_Regeneration._

Ulquiorra remembered very clearly one of the set of options that had been offered to him by Aizen – one of the many that his master had presented before him. _Increase in power? Or instant regeneration of any external body part?_

It had been an easy choice for most of the Espada and Ulquiorra included himself therein. However, his choice had differed from almost, if not all, of his comrades. Knowing himself to be already extremely powerful, he had chosen to keep his regeneration abilities, and he had still managed to be ranked 4th among them. He considered a wide range of abilities to be more useful than just one ability, such as his fellows had.

Apparently, intelligence could not be included in his wide range of abilities.

Why, in the name of Aizen had he been struggling this entire time, when he should have just regenerated himself, regenerated his emotions, his feelings, his desires – regenerated them to what they had been before he had met the woman and his shell had cracked and crumbled? Why hadn't he restored that heart of stone, the armor about his chest, the mask upon his face and the willpower beneath his skin? Why had he insisted on acting like a heartbroken teenager and thrived on the pities and favors of those sympathetic to his pathetic cause?

Ulquiorra didn't know, but the nonsense was ending here. He was through with being a weak being. If she did not know what they had before, he would make it so that he would forget as well. He needed to stop wasting time, concentration, and focus on this immature topic and return to what really mattered - being Aizen Sôsuke's faithful servant.

And that meant eliminating Ichigo Kurosaki.

Loose ends still needed to be tied up, however. It would be inconsiderate of him to assume that Halibel and Grimmjow would just automatically know to stop bestowing pity on him. He was going to deliver the jacket, flowers, and goodbye letter to the third Espada and wash his hands of this love ridiculousness.

After all, it brought only pain.

And there was no room in emptiness for pain.

Ulquiorra glided to a stop outside of Halibel's room and knocked four times upon it, as was his custom. It was swiftly opened by Halibel. She frowned a little at him and inclined her head as if asking what the matter was. Her eyes fell upon the flowers in his arms and her eyebrows shot up beneath her blond hair.

"Where did you manage to find those?" she asked him.

"It is of no matter," he intoned. "I have a final favor to ask of you. Would you please get these items to the prisoner Inoue Orihime, with my regards?"

He passed the items in his hands to Halibel, who took them with a quizzical look on her face. Yet no more questions passed her masked lips. She simply took the items and nodded once before turning away and closing the door softly behind her.

Ulquiorra then closed his eyes and felt outward with his mind, shouldering aside the spirits of other Hollows. He stumbled over the presence of his adversary quite accidentally – feeling his pressure streaking down the hallways of Las Noches rapidly, closely intertwined with the presence of a Hollow that felt familiar in a way that confused him. Pushing the thought of who it might be from his mind, Ulquiorra took off from Halibel's quarters, using Sonido to speed rapidly away from the door.

Once he got to the hallway above the corridor that the Shinigami was running down, he slowed and stopped suddenly as Aaroniero's spiritual presence was abruptly cut off. He cocked his head as an image ran through his brain – a girl with black hair impaled on Aaroniero's – or Kaien Shiba's – Nejibana trident. Closing his eyes in acceptance, he took a step forward so that he was looking down a long flight of stairs at the frozen figure of Kurosaki.

"You noticed," Ulquiorra intoned, and saw the boy's head whip around. His brown eyes were impossibly wide, his hair was plastered to his forehead with sweat, and his skin was covered with dirt and blood. _His earlier battle with Dordoni must have taken a great deal out of him. He is nowhere near full strength._

Kurosaki's breath inhaled with a loud gasp. A small whimper sounded, and Ulquiorra saw that a small, green-looking Arrancar female was tucked under his arm. He dismissed her immediately and returned his attention to Kurosaki.

"I thought you were just a boy with a lot of spirit energy," Ulquiorra continued, "but it seems your senses are pretty good too."

Kurosaki's eyes widened until Ulquiorra thought they might pop from his skull.

"You…"

"It's been a while, Soul Reaper," Ulquiorra commented, beginning to walk slowly down the stairs. He shoved his hands in his pockets and kept his gaze focused on the boy's eyes.

"You're…you're Ulquiorra!"

"You remember my name," Ulquiorra said, a little impressed, although he did not show it. "I don't recall introducing myself to you."

Neither said anything until Ulquiorra alighted on the bottom step. He looked up at Ichigo and stated, "Anyway, Rukia Kuchiki is dead."

Kurosaki's eyes widened even more, and his mouth opened. "W-what?!"

"Actually," Ulquiorra amended, "she and the Novena Espada killed each other. Her face was cut and a trident was thrust through her guts. She's quite dead."

"That's a lie!" Kurosaki insisted. "It was just a drop in her spiritual pressure! Anyway, you didn't fight her, so how would you know?"

"Ninshiki Dôki," Ulquiorra explained, although he didn't think it mattered. "It was one of the Novena Espada's abilities and one of his duties. He could instantly relay data about any enemy he was facing to save his comrades."

Abruptly, Kurosaki turned on his heel and began walking quickly away. Ulquiorra slowly rotated his body in order to continue facing him, and after he had gone a fair distance, called, "Where are you going?"

"I'm going to save Rukia."

_He seems to have a bit of a hero complex._ "I told you, she's dead."

"I don't believe you."

"Have it your way then," Ulquiorra conceded, "but shouldn't you kill me first?"

"I have no reason to kill you."

"What do you mean?"

"We may be enemies, but you haven't hurt any of my friends yet."

An image of shimmering orange hair flashed in his mind's eye; glittering silver eyes, a sparkling laugh.

Ulquiorra steeled his resolve.

How wrong Kurosaki was.

"You think not?" he asked quietly. "What if I told you that I was the one who brought Orihime Inoue to Hueco Mundo?"

He barely had time to bring up his hand in defense before Kurosaki was attacking him, fury in his eyes. _That got him._

"Then she _didn't_ come of her own free will!"

"How interesting," Ulquiorra commented dryly. "You came all the way here to save her even though you weren't certain of her innocence."

Kurosaki ignored him. "You realize what you've done?!" he shouted. "Because of you, everyone thinks Inoue's a traitor!"

"Yes, and that's exactly as I intended."

"You dirty…!" Kurosaki began, overwhelmed by hatred.

"Now do you have a reason to fight me?" Ulquiorra asked the Shinigami.

Kurosaki jumped back from Ulquiorra, sliding to stand at the side of the small female Hollow, who was lying on the floor with her hands over her head. He addressed her gently.

"Nel, stay back."

"Itsy…Itsygo…" she whimpered, looking up at him with tears in her eyes.

"Looks like we're going to do this the hard way," Ichigo announced to the girl, with a cocky grin on his face. Ulquiorra simply looked at him, and he continued. "Sorry, but I'm in a hurry," Kurosaki apologized, "-I won't be holding back."

He extended his sword hand with a defiant gesture, and black spiritual energy swirled around him. Ulquiorra watched silently, grudgingly admitting that he was impressed by the sheer force of the boy's power. He had definitely improved since the last time they had met…but that was not saying a lot.

"Bankai, eh?" he murmured, but then stopped abruptly as Kurosaki's face came into view. His eyes widened in surprise.

Settled upon Kurosaki's face was a Hollow mask.

Before he had time to think, Kurosaki was attacking him. Black energy streamed from his blade, and Ulquiorra blocked quickly with his forearm before the momentum caused both men to fly apart. The pillars in the hallway shattered as Ulquiorra regained his footing, focus evident on his features.

_What was that? That spiritual pressure, that mask…He's like one of us!_

His eyes widened again as a whirlpool of energy began to swirl around Kurosaki, making the wind lift in the room. From behind his mask, yellow, animalistic eyes glinted.

"It's over. _Getsuga Tenshô."_

A ribbon of black energy sliced its way through the air towards Ulquiorra. He lifted a hand out of his pocket to stop it, but the magnitude of sheer power was too great. Astonished, he rapidly drew his other hand from his pocket and added it to the barricade, but it was still not enough.

"No…" he murmured in surprise, before relaxing his muscles and allowing himself to be blown backwards through the wall, shattering layers of stone and landing on his rear in the sand outside in the sun.

He allowed himself a few seconds to recover, feeling irritated. Standing, he checked for damage – his uniform was slightly ripped, but otherwise he seemed to be fine. No broken bones from the crash, but his sleeves were mostly gone and his coattails were in shreds.

_How annoying._

He sighed and picked his way back into the castle, seeing that Kurosaki and his little friend were conversing comfortably as though they had already won the entire battle, which was even more vexing. He raised his spiritual pressure and saw Kurosaki whip around, shock on his face.

"Well, well," he intoned.

Kurosaki's gaze zeroed in on him, seeing his slightly abused clothing but otherwise intact body. Disbelief marched obviously across his cheekbones. "Wh…what?!" he breathed.

"You surprised me. I couldn't stop that one, even with both hands," Ulquiorra allotted, willing to give the boy that much. He flexed his fingers, which were a little sore. "Was that the best you've got?"

Kurosaki simply stared at him, his mouth opening and closing but no sound emerging from his lips.

Ulquiorra raised one hand and dusted off his shoulder. "I think it was," he concluded. He moved his hand forward and lowered his middle, ring and pinky fingers, extending his index toward the stunned orange-haired boy.

"_How unfortunate."_

The green energy began to collect at the tip of his finger without him even needing to speak the command. Too late, Kurosaki realized what was happening and sprang into action.

The Cero blasted straight through the wall, carrying Kurosaki and his Arrancar comrade out of the castle and into the desert with it. As Kurosaki reoriented himself on the ground below, Ulquiorra leaped from the hole and flew to the boy's side. Too late, Kurosaki saw him – just in time for Ulquiorra's foot to connect with his face and send him flying into a huge pile of rubble in an overhang.

Coughing, Kurosaki attempted to sit up. The top half of his shihakushô was mostly blown away, and his right leg was also exposed. All the skin that could be seen was covered in blood and dirt, and fresh blood was running from his mouth and numerous small cuts on his body's surface. And yet despite all of this, the small Arrancar was still tucked safely under his arm, uninjured – albeit unconscious.

Ulquiorra stepped into the opening of the overhang, and Kurosaki sent him a glare as full of hate and rage as he could muster.

"When you went to block the Cero, that mask appeared again," Ulquiorra stated. "The transformation was very fast. But it shattered right away, didn't it? You won't be able to generate it again, I think."

He stepped closer, seeing Kurosaki's filthy ribcage expanding with every gulp of air.

"Give up," he commanded.

Abruptly, Kurosaki's black blade slammed into his chest. If Ulquiorra had any skin besides his Hierro, it would have pierced his heart. As it was, the blade scratched his skin slightly.

"I don't…give up," the boy on the ground panted. "You're the leader of the Espadas, right? So if I beat you…" He lifted his head. He was bearing a large, defiant grin. "This war's as good as won!"

Ulquiorra was shocked into silence. _And I thought he couldn't get any dimmer. Apparently I was wrong._

"I see," he said, recovering. "How unfortunate."

He grasped Kurosaki's blade in his hand and used it to rip his uniform open, baring his rank of 4. He saw Kurosaki's eyes widen as he released the blade, which clattered to the floor in Kurosaki's loose grip.

"Four?!" Kurosaki gasped. "What?!"

"That's right," Ulquiorra said. "I'm the Quatro Espada. Ulquiorra Schiffer. I'm ranked fourth among the Espada."

He lunged forward abruptly and sunk his hand into Kurosaki's chest, impaling the boy on his fingers. Just as quickly he drew it out, watching Kurosaki gag on his blood and slump to the floor.

"Ichigo Kurosaki," he said, "You can't defeat me. And even if you somehow manage to, there are three Espadas above me. No matter how many times you get back up again, there can be no victory for you here."

He flung his arm to the side, spraying an arc of scarlet across the dusty floor. Then he let his gore-painted fingers hang back at his side.

"It looks like I overestimated you," he said quietly. "You're not as strong as I thought. This is the end for you."

On the floor, Kurosaki made no sound.

"Leave this world immediately if you can still move. If you can't, stay there and die. Your quest ends here, Soul Reaper."

Ulquiorra turned on his heel and left as Kurosaki's Bankai evaporated behind him.

_Mission accomplished, my lord._


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: SORRY THIS IS LATE~**

**I'm going to tell you a little story. My mother currently does not have a kitchen, because it's getting renovated, and so we decided to go to the food trucks for dinner. I was like – "NO I HAVE TO WORK" but of course I went ignored…so I sat at the food trucks and nibbled my hamburger because I have spacers (again) (ugh) and listened to that Pierce the Veil/Kellin Quinn song about a million times and rocked out because I cut/dyed my own hair and it looks like a cross between Hayley Williams/Skrillex/Jordan Witzigreuter and is perfect for headbanging with until my mom made me stop because people were staring.**

**The end. I hope you enjoyed it.**

Carefully zipping up the jacket on a new uniform, Ulquiorra considered his next move. Kurosaki was dead, he knew – by now the boy had surely breathed his last. Somehow, vanquishing the orange-haired teenager hadn't quite granted him the satisfaction he had expected. He still felt…

He still felt what, exactly?

He pushed those thoughts away and slid Murciélago through his belt, sliding on his sandals and heading for the door. He was headed for Aizen-sama next, to report the boy's death – although he doubted that his master was unaware of this occurrence, it was protocol to alert him.

Halibel had caught up to him on his way back to his room and given him her latest letter. He read it quickly, but gave it little thought. At least he had taken the thing. He had had half a mind not to even accept it. But he scanned it quickly, then crumpled it in his fist and left the ball of paper on his desk.

He was done with that nonsense.

Letting his footsteps trace the familiar path to his master's room was slightly comforting, and it was a mindless action. It needed no thought, so Ulquiorra cleared his mind and _Orihime's spiritual pressure was back._

That was all it took.

All.

It.

Took.

He didn't hesitate, didn't think. In the time it took him to start Sonido-ing to her room, he was doing it. With no whys or plans of what he would do when he got there. He just had to see her. Just had to know she was okay.

_Hypocritical trash._

He didn't care.

He had to know.

Had to –

He stopped outside her room and stared in shock at the destruction it had become. A hole had been blasted through the wall, rubble was scattered on the floor. Inside, all the furniture was still the same, albeit dusty. One thing was missing – Orihime. Instead, Aizen's two playthings, Loly and Menoly, were standing inside the room, staring at him with a mixture of undisguised fear and hatred.

He stared back, keeping his face stony. "What is the meaning of this?" he intoned, staring the girls down. Both of them flinched.

He took several steps into the room, turning to face the cavern blown in the wall. "Who did this?" he asked.

Loly's voice came to him. "G-grimmjow…"

His eyes widened. Quickly he controlled his expression once more, turning his head to look at the black-haired girl. She was trembling, and she flinched at his gaze, but she held her gaze strong.

"…I see."

He turned again and strode from the room, letting himself sense for Grimmjow's spiritual pressure. Grasping onto the brash sensation of the blue-haired Espada, he leapt into Sonido once more, rapidly pulling himself closer to the man who had destroyed Orihime's habitat.

As he grew closer to the presence of the 6th Espada, he became aware of Orihime's spiritual pressure as well, along with the green-haired Arrancar female and –

Kurosaki Ichigo.

The boy was alive?!

He picked up the pace and was soon outside, under the false sky Aizen-sama had erected. The sunlight flashed over the sand as he sped over the desert, kicking up little clouds of dust with each step. He could see the cave wherein Kurosaki's corpse had lain, not even one hour previously. Anger swelled within him and he took one last spring with Sonido, shimmering into place behind Grimmjow.

It took him about half a second to register the scene before his eyes. Grimmjow was standing in front of him, his back to Ulquiorra. Before Grimmjow, Orihime was kneeling, with her orange dome erected over Kurosaki. The green-haired child was whimpering on the floor.

Under Orihime's dome, Kurosaki was lying, eyes open, clearly alive.

Grimmjow whipped around to face him. Orihime spun about as well, faint recognition sparking in her eyes. His eyes flickered on her, seeing that she was healthy and fine, and a weight was lifted off of his shoulders that he wasn't even aware he was carrying. Then he returned his gaze to Grimmjow.

"What are you doing, Grimmjow?" he asked calmly, trying to hide the rage that shook behind his voice.

Grimmjow was silent, glaring at him. His eyes looked uncertain, like he was debating something internally.

"What's wrong?" Ulquiorra asked him, taunted him, goaded him. "I'm talking to you."

Silence. The only thing that Ulquiorra could hear was the rapid breathing of Grimmjow, the girl, Orihime, and Ichigo – which was like a blow to the stomach.

"What are you trying to pull – healing the wounds of an enemy I already defeated?" he demanded. He pointed one black-nailed finger at Kurosaki's head. "I killed that man for Aizen-sama. You are aware that killing him goes against Aizen-sama's wishes?"

"So he's back to Aizen-sama, now?" Grimmjow finally spoke.

"I do not understand what you mean," Ulquiorra said stiffly, even though he did.

"Just because you had one little spat with the woman, now you're back to being an emotionless robot. I got to say, I prefer the other Ulquiorra."  
Orihime made a small noise, and Ulquiorra fought to keep his eyes on Grimmjow.

"It was not just a spat. She made clear her intentions. I did not wish to inflict further pain upon her. You saw what happened the last time she remembered – we had to visit her in Szayelaporro's lab; we snuck into the room while she was asleep." Another noise from the woman. "She obviously had no intentions of remembering me. I decided to let the situation dissolve."

"Fuck you," Grimmjow shouted suddenly.

"…What did you say?"

"You heard me," Grimmjow said. "I said _fuck you! _What happened to the life you promised me? You shook on it, asshole! And you're just going to "let the situation dissolve"? _Not if I've got anything to say about it, bastard!"_

Grimmjow attacked him so suddenly that Ulquiorra barely had time to react, but he managed to bring up his hand in time to stop Grimmjow from ripping through his chest. He felt the bones in his hand splintering, and when the pressure from Grimmjow's attack abated, he could instantly feel every carpal reassembling beneath his skin.

Their eyes locked, and he could see the bloodlust mixed with desperation, wild abandon, in Grimmjow's azure orbs.

"You don't seem like the type to break promises," Grimmjow hissed.

"Perhaps you should re-evaluate your judgment of my personality, then," Ulquiorra countered.

Anger clouded over Grimmjow's face. "Selfish bastard! You never think of anyone besides yourself, do you -?"

He stopped, because Ulquiorra was in the air, charging a Cero above his head. Growling, Grimmjow brought up his hand and charged a Cero of his own, countering Ulquiorra's. Both were flung away as the top of the column exploded and Ulquiorra searched the air for Grimmjow, because he had to find the blue-haired man before _he_ found _him_ –

He felt an arm wrap around his shoulder, felt a hand press to his chest. His head shot to the side, and he saw Grimmjow, clinging to his shoulder with a focused expression. Ulquiorra's gaze moved to Grimmjow's hand, leaving a tiny box that floated into Ulquiorra's Hollow hole.

"I think _you_ need to re-evaluate your judgment of your own personality," Grimmjow hissed into Ulquiorra's pale ear. "I'll give you a chance to do so now."

He leaped away from Ulquiorra as a box expanded from his Hollow hole, building rapidly around the dark haired man. Ulquiorra hissed.

"Shit."

The box snapped into oblivion, and Grimmjow was gone.

* * *

Ulquiorra tried to curse again when he realized what Grimmjow had done. The Caja de Negación was designed for the punishment of lesser Arrancar, sending them away into another dimension. No one was quite sure about what happened in the Negotiation Box, seeing as no one had ever come back. Then again, it was not designed for use on Espada. Ulquiorra figured he could be out in about three or four hours.

But that would be too late.

He tried to curse, but stopped. He tried to open his mouth, but there was no muscle response. A feeling of dread sank in the pit of his stomach, and he raised his hands to his face, letting his nails slip against bone.

Ulquiorra opened his eyes.

Around him, the bodies of a thousand black hollows lay decimated, broken, bleeding. Their glowing, chomping mouths were still. The walls of a pit rose above him, climbing higher, higher. He looked down – the ground was wet, soaked with blood. He looked at his hands – the skin was red, dripping with gore. He looked at his body – his skin was white, without clothing.

He was a Vasto Lorde again.

Incapable of speech, of hearing, of feeling, of tasting, of smelling. Reduced to one sense, reliant on one sense. He turned his brilliantly emerald eyes upward, seeing an exit from the pit high above. He stretched his black wings and leapt into the air, soaring up, up, out of the pit.

He alighted on the sand gracefully, shaking out his wings and folding them behind him. Lifting his head, he let his eyes fall upon a tree before him – and his eyes widened behind his mask. It was that tree – the tree Aizen-sama had found him in. His original void.

Each branch spiked jaggedly into the air, seeming to glow. The tree – well, it was more like a bush, really – spanned farther than even his eyes could see, The branches shone in the moonlight like metallic blades, serrated razors emitting more of a glow than looked naturally reflective of the weak light of the moon.

He could hear it calling to him.

Whispers curled their fingers to him, beckoned him. In his deaf ears, he could hear it. With his numb skin, he could feel it. In his anosmiatic nose, he could smell it. With his ageusiatic tongue, he could taste it…the call of the tree. _Come. Sink yourself into my embrace. Fall into the void I represent…fall asleep in my branches and never wake._

Like a dead man walking, Ulquiorra took a hesitant step forward.

_That's it. Come._ The pull of the tree increased, like a hand was wrapped around Ulquiorra's middle, towing him along. He took another careful step, his body boneless.

_Gomenasai, Ulquiorra-kun! I suppose you think I'm a pig, don't you?_

Ulquiorra's body froze as the woman's voice reverberated through his mind.

_Sugoi! That is so kawaii, Ulquiorra-kun!_

Now unsure, he looked at the tree, seeing the sharp branches in a different light. Should he choose the sharp embrace of the void, or the soft embrace of the woman?

_If you love someone, you want the best for them. You want them to succeed. You always want to be with them. You try to protect them and you would sacrifice anything for them. At least, that's what I've felt from my experience._

_I see. So, if all four of these urges were present, would that mean love was present?_

_Well, yes, I suppose. Why are you asking?_

_I see. Well then, Onna, I think it would be appropriate to say that I am in this "love" with you._

Love. What an abstract word. How vague in its definition. What a mysterious concept it was. Unlike the void, which represented control, exactness in its entirety.

_Come._ whispered the tree. _Come to me, Ulquiorra._

Ulquiorra went.

He walked to the tree with his head held high, giving into the pull. Giving into the temptation. He lifted his arms and accepted the tree's embrace – falling onto those serrated razors, slicing his skin, splitting his mask. Blood ran from the abrasions on his skin, but he could not feel the pain. He could not feel anything, for he was one with the void.

He lay down in the emptiness, impaled on so many glowing blades.

Brilliant emerald eyes, staring up at the starless sky, staring up at the unchanging moon, closed for the last time.

He sunk deep into the void.

He would never rise again.


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: I apologize for this shortest chapter in history. I am about to go see All-American Rejects, Boys Like Girls, Parachute, and The Ready Set at a concert that is gonna be mind-blowingly awesome. Asdfghjkl; I AM SO EXCITED! Anyways, I had so much schoolwork over the weekend that I didn't get a chance to write, so here I am now, trying to pound out a chapter. Despite the short length, there isn't really a whole lot I could have done with this part, but it did need to go in there, so …Here it is.**

**By the way, Moony thinks that the theme song for this fic is "Tell Her" by Jesse McCartney. So if you want to be cool, you can look that up.**

**Kthnnxbye~**

* * *

"No, no, no, no, no, no, NO!"

_Sound?_

"Nuh uh, Ulquiorra-sama - no getting suicidal on us. Get your skinny white butt off the floor!"

_I know that voice. _

_But how can I hear it? I thought I was a Vasto Lorde - deaf. _

"I said - get up!"

Reluctantly, Ulquiorra opened his eyes to see the forms of his Fracción standing over him. In his peripheral vision he could see the frame of his bed. He looked around - from the scene, it appeared that he had fallen out of bed. Looking around at himself, he saw that he was once again an Arrancar, dressed in his Espada uniform.

He returned his gaze to his irritated subordinates, confused beyond belief.

"Emiko?" he asked. "Daisuke?"

"Get up," Emiko repeated again.

Ulquiorra sat slowly and then attempted to stand. He didn't notice that the sheets were tangled around his legs and went toppling to the side, onto his bed.

"Pull yourself together," Emiko snapped.

"Forgive me." Ulquiorra was too bewildered to be angry. Had the whole thing with the Onna _- Orihime_, Murciélago had instructed him - and the fight with Grimmjow been a dream? Was the Caja de Negación a dream too?

The void? Had he made that up, disappearing forever?

"What is going on?" he asked, unwinding the sheet from the fabric of his uniform pants.

They didn't answer, just glared at him. Ulquiorra was starting to get irritated and angry. His first reaction was to always looks for logic in a situation, and there was no logic here.

"Look. I command you to as my Fracción to answer me. What is going on?" he ordered.

"Who's whose Fracción?" Daisuke asked.

"I don't understand your meaning."

"'I don't understand your meaning,'" Daisuke mimicked.

Frustrated, Ulquiorra stood and glowered at his Fracción. "Someone, explain to me!"

Emiko moved so fast he almost didn't see her. She drew her daggers from the hems of her daggers and attacked Ulquiorra with a speed unfitting of her rank. Ulquiorra put up his arm to block her, staggering a little at the speed of her attack. He felt the blade slice through his skin and yanked his arm away, ducking under her next attack and jumping into a handspring over the bed. His fist closed over the scabbard of his blade, and he felt a slight wave of relief wash over him.

But that was nothing compared to the confusion he felt. He wanted to shake them, he wanted to rattle the answer from their skulls, he wanted to make his hands a "T" and call time out. But there was no way he would do that. He didn't get a chance to, anyway – Emiko vaulted over the bed and came at him, attacking him with both of her blades simultaneously. He drew Murciélago at lightning speed and brought the blade up to block his subordinate's weapons, casting a glance at Daisuke to see the man lounging against the wall with a smirk on his face.

"Daisuke?" he called.

Pushing himself from the wall, Daisuke strolled over to the struggling pair. "Don't know who _that_ is," he smirked. "We're just here to stop you from giving up."

"Giving up?"

"Dazzle in lightness, Brillante."

Ulquiorra was suddenly struck be an intense light coming from Emiko's blades. He could not resist – his hands fell from Murciélago's hilt, shooting up to shield his weeping eyes. Water streamed from his tear ducts at the painful light before him, and he jammed his knuckles against his lids in effort to try and make the light dimmer somehow.

"Whoa. Turn that down," came Daisuke's voice, sounding pained. "We don't want to blind him."

"Then what _do_ you want to do?" Ulquiorra demanded, his eyes still closed tightly. "What do you want from me? Where am I? How did I get here? Why are you here? Where is the void? And most importantly, where is the Onna?"

"Ah – most importantly, huh?"

"No. I must amend myself. She is not the most important," Ulquiorra quickly responded. "She is actually the least important. The most important thing is you telling me what is going on here."

"Calm down. You're acting weird. It's freaking me out," Emiko said.

"_You're_ freaking _me_ out!" Ulquiorra lost it. He backed several steps away, attempting to open his eyes. However the light was still much too bright to look at.

"Scary." Emiko commented. "Okay, your turn."

"Fine." Daisuke sounded eager. "We're not killing him, right?"

"Right. We're just sending him to the next stage."

Blind, dazed, Ulquiorra held one hand in front of him while one hand blocked his vision. He was so stunned he barely had any more room to be surprised at just how badly he was being beaten by his subordinates.

"Cloak in darkness, Sombrío."

A loud rustling could be heard, and the brightness diminished significantly. Ulquiorra cracked open his streaming eyes, and saw Daisuke standing triumphantly with huge black wings protruding from his back.

"What…?"

"Come here, Ulquiorra-sama," Daisuke commanded. Ulquiorra was rooted to the floor as Daisuke took steps towards him, shaking his wings. "Come on, it won't hurt, I promise."

"What…?" Ulquiorra was now beyond confused. He looked from one Arrancar to the other, a quizzical expression coming over his face. "What…?"

"Is that all you have to say?" Daisuke mocked him, and then nodded at something behind Ulquiorra's back. Too late, he realized that Emiko was there. The wings gave a huge rustle, and Ulquiorra found himself surrounded by darkness on all sides. He turned frantically around – right into Emiko's embrace.

She wrapped her arms around his neck and aimed the daggers straight at his eyes.

With an inhuman scream, Ulquiorra was lost in the incredible light.

_Orihime…help me…_

* * *

**O_o **

**For some reason I always forget to say this, but guys – don't forget that this is part of a collaboration. Don't forget to read moonlightrurouni's side of the story, and don't forget to review!**


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: BROS.**

**If you've read my story, _My Espada Boys,_ you are gonna LOVE this chapter.**

**If you haven't, maybe this will encourage some of you to do so. I don't know...maybe you'll like this chapter enough to do that. If you do, don't forget to drop a review.**

**(I ordered the new All Time Low CD and it came. Guess what I'll be listening to on repeat for the next billion trillion million years)**

**Oh, and ... If you guys want to see how I draw, check out my dA: thecatwiththehat. deviantart. com (remove spaces) I am going to be putting up a pretty cool picture there soon. My sister was in the hospital last week and my mom wasn't calling and I was worried and needed something to distract myself with so...I drew a self portrait and it came out...scarily accurate O_o So if anyone has an insatiable curiosity as to what I look like, drop by there sometime in the future.**

* * *

Ulquiorra kept his eyes shut tightly for a long time. Even though the bright light was mostly gone, his retinas were still burning and the muscles in his eyelids weren't responding to his commands. So he laid in humiliation.

_How had they beaten him so easily?_

He could write it off as him being confused. That was the easy solution. The problem was, that wasn't like him. He wasn't the type to let emotion get involved. He wouldn't usually allow himself to be distracted so easily.

So why did he?

Ulquiorra was shaken out of his thoughts by the feeling of someone poking his forehead curiously. He opened his eyes very slowly, and then almost let out a yell at what he saw.

Two emerald eyes that mirrored his exactly were two inches from his face.

Ulquiorra bolted upright, sitting at ninety degrees and taking in the setting in a split second. He appeared to be lying in some sort of sand, surrounded by a wooden frame to hold it in. The sandy box was about five feet square, and he was lying diagonally inside it, barely fitting. Around the box were some kind of chopped up wood chips, leading down at a slope to colorful pieces of play equipment. The entire park was surrounded by a tall black fence with multiple gates set in it.

He whipped his head around. His eyes bulged and his mouth opened the slightest bit at what he saw.

A child version of himself was sitting in the sandbox, head cocked curiously. There was no helmet on his head, and his eyes were slightly larger and more feminine looking. He was wearing a baggy olive green T-shirt, stained, ripped blue jeans, and holey sneakers with one pale toe sticking out. He had a large scar on his forehead and the left side of his neck, a kind of weirdly wrinkled spot. Faded green lines trailed down from his large, glittering eyes.

"Who are you?" Ulquiorra demanded.

"That is rude," said the boy. "I could ask the same thing of you, mister. You're dressed kind of funny, you know?"

Ulquiorra glanced down at himself. For some reason he was in his first release form. He felt his head. Sure enough, the two-tiered helmet was perched atop his cranium.

"Yeah, what kind of a man wears a dress, anyway?" sneered a voice that Ulquiorra recognized with a sinking feeling. He turned, thinking he couldn't be any more surprised, but was proven sadly wrong.

A younger version of Grimmjow stood sassily behind him, one hand propped on his miniature hip. His hair was the same color, arranged messily on top of his head, just the same as the Grimmjow that Ulquiorra knew and hated so well. While his eyes were slightly larger, younger-looking, and his face was not as angular, the similarities were such that they took Ulquiorra's breath away. Instead of a mask across his cheek, however, his face was marred by the same pale, wrinkled spot as the miniature version of himself, almost as if it was extremely waterlogged or had been covered for a long time and then suddenly uncovered.

Ulquiorra felt slightly faint.

"Excuse me," came the slightly raspy voice of his prepubescent self, "but are you my daddy?"

"You have a daddy," Grimmjow II reminded him.

"No, I mean my real daddy."

"Mr. Ichigo _is_ your real daddy," Grimmjow II persisted.

"Grimm, stop it. You know what I mean. My _real_ daddy." His smaller self didn't seem to know the word to describe it, so he gave up and turned to Ulquiorra. "Are you?"

"I am not." Ulquiorra pushed himself from the ground. "Where am I?"

"Did you fall from space?" Grimm asked eagerly.

"What's your name, anyway, mister?" asked his younger self.

"Ulquiorra Schiffer."

Both children gasped and turned to each other, exchanging an obvious look before turning back to Ulquiorra. "His too!" Grimmjow II exclaimed, flinging his arm toward his friend. "Hey Hallie! Come see this!"

_Who's this? A friend? _Ulquiorra had no idea, so he was shocked to see Halibel – as a young girl – walking towards them with a curious lilt to her step, yet casual, as if she had all the time in the world. Her blond hair looked as though it had been cut with safety scissors, her teal eyes seemed to crafty for her young face, and she was wearing an overlarge burgundy sweater rolled up over the lower half of her face, matched with black leggings and furry boots.

Halibel II didn't say anything, simply raised an eyebrow at her friends.

"Look. He says his name's Ulquiorra Schiffer, just like this Ulquiorra. And he looks just like him. Except the dress."

Ulquiorra could feel his nerves being shot. "Could someone please explain to me where I am?"

"Planet Earth," Ulquiorra II said seriously.

"Earth?" So this must be the World of the Living. Ulquiorra looked down at the children, who were all looking back at him wonderingly. He was beyond confused at this point, and was just feeling weary acceptance. "Are all the Espada alive here?"

At the word _Espada,_ all three children stiffened. "Are you one of them?" Grimmjow II asked quietly.

"One of who?"

"One of the people from Soul Society," Ulquiorra II elaborated.

"They're meanie butts." Grimmjow II looked quite enthusiastic about this statement. Halibel II rolled her eyes.

"I am not from Soul Society. I am from Hueco Mundo."

"Ohh…that was the Hollow place, right?" Grimmjow II asked.

Ulquiorra's nerves were fraying again. "Are there any adults here I can talk to that know about Soul Society?" he asked the children. He hated relying on such undeveloped beings for assistance but there was no other choice that he could see. He was forced to accept help from these juveniles or not get help at all. Nor did he want to harm them, for he did not know what might happen to his present self if he killed his young self.

"Yes, there's mommy," Ulquiorra II said, then turned and yelled over his shoulder, "MOMMY! COME HERE!"

Ulquiorra shifted from foot to foot barely perceptibly, waiting for his young self's mother to appear. When she finally did, puffing, it took his breath away, stunning him from words.

Time had been more than kind to Orihime Inoue. It was clear that she was in her mid-twenties, perhaps ten years later than she was the last time he had seen her. She wore her hair pulled back in a ponytail, and wore thin framed, square shaped glasses on her nose. Her figure was impeccable as always, and she was clothed in a simple outfit befitting, perhaps, a school teacher. Her face was flushed from running up the hill at her son's call, and she was carrying a boy who was perhaps four years old. A little girl was following at her heels, the same age as the boy.

Orihime lifted her eyes and connected with Ulquiorra's, and she froze. Several seconds passed in which Orihime and Ulquiorra simply stared at each other in silence. A slight breeze picked up, blowing small tendrils of hair across her face and sending her flowery skirt fluttering about her knees.

Slowly she set down the boy in her arms and took a step towards him, still gazing wonderingly at his face.

"Ulquiorra?" she asked, and her voice sent a little thrill through him.

"Onna," he acknowledged, and suddenly she was in his arms, squeezing the life out of him. Her head rested just next to his Hollow hole, and he could feel her body shaking. Slowly he raised his arms to wrap around her body, holding her tightly to his frame.

Even though she was not the Orihime he loved, his body still longed to fall into hers. How he had missed this sensation of holding her close to him. What with his Onna not knowing who he was – even sending him letters full of anger and distrust – he had been feeling empty. So empty. He was reminded how it felt to be filled, filled to the brim, overflowing.

"Ulquiorra," she cried into his uniform, and her voice was as broken as he felt.

Holding her to him, he was reminded of everything they had once done –

_It was her cheeks, he decided; definitely her cheeks. They were so soft, so smooth; they were always flushed so beautifully whenever she looked at him. Under his cold fingers, they were so warm; but as he slid his ivory hands up toward her eyes, and back down towards her hair, he changed his mind. No, it was not her cheeks; it was her hair. Fanning out behind her head, it was thick, luxurious, intoxicating. He ran his fingers between the strands, passing easily through the silky mass. Sliding his hands down, resting them on the small of her back, he changed his mind again; it was her eyes, definitely her eyes. Closed now, he could vividly see her sparkling gray orbs behind his own green eyes - open and gazing at him, or darting away when she opened her mouth in some loving admission, or even hidden behind delicate, purplish lids, fluttering when her lips touched his. And that brought his mind back to what he was now sure was her best feature: her lips. Pink, plump, smooth as a baby's bottom, they were usually stretched into a smile as wide as the ocean and as happy as an innocent puppy. His favorite place for them to be, however, was locked solidly against his own, as they were now._

_Hot tongues battled within her wet mouth; he won over and began to explore the cavern he found himself inside. His hands roamed restlessly over her back, up and down from her shoulder blades over her hips. Her fingers scratched at his chest through his shirt, making his gut tingle in a way that made him angle his head even closer to her. He clutched her body even closer to his, sandwiching himself between her magnificent chest and the white couch she slept on, a shiver running over him. Their legs twined together, and every so often one of hers would give a little kick. She moaned, her voice low, into his mouth, and suddenly there was too much fabric and he wanted it gone and he'd rip it from her skin if he had to, didn't matter if they were on the uncomfortable old couch in her room, nothing would get between him and his Orihime –_

But no, he couldn't. He didn't know what her life was like –if she was married, if she had never even been kissed (although he couldn't even imagine that being possible) – if this was even the same Orihime that had loved him once. He didn't know any of the circumstances, so he had to hold himself back.

All he could do now was hold her.

* * *

_He could not explain the feeling that made his chest constrict when he laid his eyes upon her form. It was a tightening in his torso, a pounding in his head; it was a sensation that made his ears ring and his abdomen tingle, a sensation that made his knees weak and his fingers tremble. It made him want to run to her graceful form, fold her willowy frame within his embrace, clutch her tightly against his muscular chest and never let go. It made him want to grasp her soft, feminine jaw, made him want to tilt up her glowing face with slight pressure applied with his thumbs, made him want to press his black and white lips to her pink ones. Made him want to see her laugh and dance, made him want to wipe away her tears. It scared him, and the only thing that dissolved his worry was when he was able to do these things, to press her into his arms and kiss away her sorrow. To tell her that everything would be okay._

* * *

"What's going on?"

Ulquiorra and Orihime were sitting on a park bench, facing each other. She posed the question, looking at him above her glasses, in a way that was so adorable that it made him want to smash his lips to hers.

He looked away.

"Your guess is as good as mine."

"I thought you were dead."

He whipped his head to face her again. His expression must have been alarmed, because she stared back at him in confusion.

"Dead?"

"Ichigo-kun killed you on top of the fifth tower eleven years ago."

Horror flooded through him.

"In Hueco Mundo?"

"Yes." Her face was even more confused now. "When I was kidnapped so long ago. Don't you remember?"

"That hasn't happened yet." Her eyes widened, and he continued. "We are in the middle of that battle. Currently I believe Kurosaki is battling Grimmjow, or perhaps there has been a winner by now. I have been sealed in the Caja de Negación and am yet to emerge, if at all."

Her expression was suddenly filled with fear.

"Oh, no," she breathed. "Oh, no, oh, no, oh, no."

"I am sorry," he apologized. "I did not intend to alarm you. Did you at least remember me before I died?"

Now the confusion was back on her face. "What?"

"Did you remember me," he persisted.

"I never forgot you." She sounded uncertain. "What are you talking about?"

Now he was confused as well. "We were lovers, and Aizen-sama found out, and…" He stopped when she looked at him like he was crazy. "Anómino?" he asked.

"Who is that?"

There was a pause. Ulquiorra tried to think logically. His brain was spinning at a mile a minute.

"Perhaps these are parallel worlds," he mused. "Perhaps this is the world inside the Caja de Negación."

"Tell me what happened," she commanded. The look in her eyes was so worried that he did as she bid him. He started at the part when he left to kidnap her, to when they fell in love, to Aizen finding out. He told about her memory being erased, about the letters they sent – the good, the bad, and the ugly. He told her about Anómino, Emiko and Daisuke. He told her everything up until he knew.

"So far, since I have been inside the Caja de Negación, I have been progressing through stages of evolution," he said. "It started when I was in my Vasto Lorde form. I was in Hueco Mundo, back at the void. I succumbed to its pull, so angry that you hated me was I. Next I was in my bedroom, in my Arrancar form. Emiko and Daisuke attacked me and were unaware of who they were as my subordinates. They overpowered me quickly, and as I sank into oblivion, I remember calling out for your help. And now I am here, in my first release state." He glanced behind himself at the five children playing in the sandy box. "When I woke, I was confronted with myself – and then Grimmjow – and then even Halibel. And then, I see you."

She sighed and tucked her hair behind her ear, looking down at her lap. "In Hueco Mundo, Ichigo killed you and then defeated Aizen," she said. "I married him six years later. The red-haired children you see are our children. Twins, Sora and Masaki."

"You married my killer." Ulquiorra was surprised to hear a little jealousy in his own voice.

Hurt flashed across her face before she continued. "Last year we discovered that the Espada had been reborn as children. Soul Society found out and the Espadalings were nearly condemned to death. With help from the Vizards and Shiro-san we were able to help save them. Ulquiorra was living on the streets, so we took him in as our own."

"All of the Espada were defeated and killed?" Ulquiorra asked.

"I assume so."

Ulquiorra frowned.

"And you are certain you do not have any recollection of us ever being in love?"

She looked intently at her lap. "No, I'm positive."

"I see." He couldn't help but feel a little bit disappointed.

"But I may be able to help you." She looked at him earnestly. "I remember so many things I wanted to say to you. Now I can say them."

"You cannot change the past, Onna," Ulquiorra told her.

"But you said it yourself. These are parallel worlds. What I say here won't affect anything."

"Do not worry," he assured her. "I have every intention of staying alive. Kurosaki could never beat me, not in a million years. He just does not have the power. His Bankai is miserable and his Hollowfication is pathetic."

"You never know what can happen," Orihime warned him, and there was worry in her voice. "Don't assume he's weak. You don't know what could happen."

"You don't either," Ulquiorra said. "Your world was different than mine. In mine, we are in love. In yours, we were not close."

"We _were_ in love," she corrected. "But, not anymore, from what you have told me."

Ulquiorra could feel himself becoming angry. "You have no idea what I have gone through," he began, but she interrupted him.

"Stop it," she said, waving her arms. "Stop, stop stop. Look. This can't be happening. I just need to tell you some things."

"You really shouldn't."

"I don't care. I'm going to."

She was so stubborn. Ulquiorra remembered how much he loved that about her. He closed his eyes and sighed. "Fine."

"Yay!" She clapped her hands. "Okay. The first thing you should know is –"

There was a loud sucking sound, and then nothing.

_No…_

* * *

**__P.S.**

**For those of you who didn't know...**

**Dan is not on fire.**

**Review and check out Orihime's side at Cursed to Forget!**


	14. Chapter 14

**Heyy. I'M SORRY THIS IS LATE. I had extra-curricular activities. (Float building. Fun! not.) Anyway, I'm really sorry, I totally forgot.**

**Guys, I don't like to nag but I gotta say it. I'm a little upset that I only got one review last time. I know there are more people reading this because for every chapter I get about 5 subscriptions. So Please drop a review, or else I feel like I'm writing blind. And I'm sorry I had to say that because I hate nagging but it really kind of hurt my feelings. lol i fail at emotions**

**Also, more news...GUESS WHO'S DOING NANOWRIMO THIS YEAR. Well you're in luck because this is the one story I'm not going on hiatus for, so...if you don't know what NaNoWriMo is, it's basically where you write a 50K word novel during the month of November. O_o and this is my first time doing it, so...Wish me luck!**

**Lastly, I feel an additional disclaimer is necessary...In the letters I took a TON of song lyrics. So, the lyrics belong to their respective artists. If you recognize any, let me know :D**

**(Oh and if anyone wants to see any of my are (and what I look like :D) I have a deviantART account where I post stuff regularly, so... Check it out! thecatwiththehat. deviantart. com (remove le spaces)**

With a sudden shock, Ulquiorra was slammed into being forcefully. One hand flew to his chest as he sucked in air desperately, feeling like a fish flopping pitifully on the sand. He closed his eyes and let the emotion wash over him.

The Orihime from the future had absolutely terrified him. And that was not something that anyone else had ever managed to do.

In just a few short sentences, she had revealed that all of his newfound dreams would be shattered. Grimmjow was dead. Or, if he wasn't, he was definitely dying now, even as Ulquiorra was locked inside the Caja de Negación. Ulquiorra himself was doomed to die – killed by the man who would then go on to defeat Aizen and marry the woman he –

He –

- the woman he loved.

Because that was it, he realized with a sudden rush of calm relief; was that he loved Orihime Inoue, and would continue to love her until the day he died.

Which could be approaching far quicker than he felt comfortable with.

He had gone from having nothing to lose, to having _everything_ to lose, and he was going to lose it.

He was going to lose it all, god _damn_ it.

Ulquiorra rested his head in his hands, preparing to think of a solution. However, as soon as this action had been preformed he reversed it, seeking to become aware of his surroundings, and when he saw, he was puzzled.

He was in a room, if one could call it that. But the floors – the walls – the ceiling; were not made of a solid material, nor did they appear to be liquid or gas. Ulquiorra could not explain it. The media was purple and black, _moving_ as though it was constructed of some sort of spirit energy, as though it was alive. The colors swirled slowly, looking like a sort of animated tie-dye. He could not clearly see where the floor met the walls, or the walls met the ceiling.

He was seated at a desk. Simple and wooden, it had nothing but his engraved, green-ink pen, and a pad of paper atop it. He reached out to grab his pen, and saw that it was covered in black fur. He looked down – he was in his Segunda Etapa form, tail, wings, and all.

Ulquiorra reached down and gripped the chair, scooting himself in. His legs barely fit beneath the desk, and he hunched over the notepad, picking up the pen and holding it delicately between razor-sharp black talons.

He began to write.

. **. x X x . **.

_My sweet Orihime,_

_Something bizarre has happened._

_I have seen the future._

_Now let me explain what has been happening. I'm sure you will be wondering what has been happening to me whist I am trapped inside the Caja de Negación due to Grimmjow's earlier behavior. I would like to say that it has been a …a journey, for me. Let me explain further. When I entered this domain, I admit I was angry with you. I was angry with myself, with Grimmjow, even with Aizen. I did not want to go on. I convinced myself that I did not need you or anyone. I did not even need myself. I gave into the void, Onna. I gave into the temptation. And that is something that I sincerely regret._

_When I woke I was in my own room and was attacked by none other than my own Fracción. They did not seem to know who I was or even who they were. This humiliates me, but they bested me with speed that was not appropriate for the 4__th__ most powerful in Aizen's army. _

_This is when I saw the future._

_I was somehow sent to another world in which all of the Espada had apparently been reborn as normal humans. I saw Grimmjow, Halibel, and myself as five or six year old children. I then was greeted by you, as a twenty six year old woman. You were breathtakingly beautiful. You said that Kurosaki had killed me and that you and he had married and had two children. _

_The betrayal that I felt was tumultuous. I not only found out that I was to die in a matter of hours, but also that the woman I loved would marry my killer. Would raise a family with my killer._

_I can't let that happen._

_-Ulquiorra._

. **. x X x . **.

Ulquiorra put down his pen, wondering what he was supposed to do next. He glanced at the ground, noticing where the desk met the floor the media turned white, looking like lightning. From somewhere far away, Ulquiorra could hear music playing.

He ripped his letter from the pad of paper, pushing it to the side. It fluttered and then laid still. He didn't notice; he had already moved on to the next paper, writing with a slightly sped up feeling to his words.

. **. x X x . **.

_Onna, _

_I fall at the thought of us falling apart, but I swore to never use my head before I use my heart. And you'll keep me breathing, grant me peace through the night my dear. I hope your dreams are as sweet as real life. Because this is my favorite thing by far, and you defy everything I've ever known. But why do you believe in fate? Do you believe in destiny? Would you believe me if I told you, you complete me?_

_I don't say this lightly, so don't take this lightly._

_Don't tell me the things that you think I want to hear. Just tell me the truth, and the whole truth,__your thoughts, and your hopes, and your dreams, and your fears. 'Cause I don't have time to waste if all that you're looking for is a chase. Don't let me be just another mistake, but still it's a chance that I'm willing to take for you - it's all for you._

_This is my favorite thing by far, and you defy everything I've ever known, but why? Why me, when you could have had anybody? _

_Hi, nice to meet to meet you. Was it nice to meet me too?_

_-Ulquiorra._

. **. x X x . **.

Now he pulled that paper from the stack, barely pausing to move his pen aside before laying it down once more, ready to write. His thrust at the paper was so violent that it sent the letter all the way off the edge of the desk.

. **. x X x . **.

_Dear Onna,_

_I miss you._

. **. x X x . **.

_Orihime,_

_I looked, but you're not by my side. Whatever happened to "I would rather die?"_

_The things that make you fall apart – they're breaking and entering._

_Ulquiorra_

. **. x X x . **.

_Goodbye, my almost lover._

. **. x X x . **.

_Inoue,_

_I'm sick and tired of pretending you'll ever come back. I just wish you were here. I wish you well, I wish we could share this hell. But, you leave, and the stains are left on me._

_And I'm broken._

_Ulquiorra._

. **. x X x . **.

_Orihime – I'm just a robot, I have no fears. I lack emotion and I shed no tears. I'm just a coma, a deadly sleep. My heart is breaking, but I just …can't weep._

. **. x X x . **.

His letters were becoming shorter; his handwriting was becoming sloppier. He steadied himself, tearing the latest letter from the pad, pushing it aside. He straightened, taking a deep breath, and then bent over the paper once more.

. **. x X x . **.

_Inoue,_

_How can you see into my eyes, like open doors?_

_No one else could ever do that. To them, I was always closed off, unreadable. Fill in the blanks, pencil on paper, disposable._

_And now that you're there, I need you to wake me up. Wake me up inside – I can't wake up. Save me: call my name and save me from the dark. _

_And that's all I need to hear; my name on your lips, falling from your sweet mouth. Bid my blood to run before I come undone. Save me from the nothing I've become._

_In Las Noches, I've come to realize this. I'm frozen inside without your touch, without your love. Onna, only you are the life among the dead._

_Onna, bring me to life._

. **. x X x . **.

_Orihime,_

_I'm just a moment, so don't let me pass you by. We can be a story in the morning, but we'll be a legend tonight. They can speak our names in a dead language, because you and I, we're alive.. but just for a moment._

_Ulquiorra._

. **. x X x . **.

_Orihime: You know how I'm trying to find my place? I've started to realize that it might not be here, where I feel safe. We all learn to make mistakes, but we also learn to run from them. With no direction, with no conviction. Inoue, you must realize – I'm just one of those ghosts, traveling endlessly. I don't need a road – in fact, they follow me. I've been told that this is just life, and pain is just a simple compromise so we can get what we want out of it. Would you care to classify my broken heart, my twisted mind, so I can find someone to rely on and run to them? Run to them, full speed ahead? I had hoped that would be you, but even if it's not, you're not useless. I guess we're all just misguided ghosts traveling endlessly. The ones we trusted the most pushed us far away. Orihime, there's no one road. The vision from the future made me believe that. I think we should not be the same. But who am I to say? I'm just a ghost, and still they echo me. –Ulquiorra._

. **. x X x . **.

_Onna, _

_When will the princess figure it out? She's not worth saving._

_But when will the world get over all her misbehaving?_

_I'll paint you wings and I'll set you free. Orihime, I'll set you free to fly away._

_Ulquiorra._

. **. x X x . **.

_Inoue,_

_I know you've suffered, but I don't want you to hide. I want to reconcile the violence in your heart. I want to recognize your beauty is not just a mask. I want exorcise the demons from your past. I want to satisfy the undisclosed desires in your heart. _

_-Ulquiorra._

. **. x X x . **.

_Orihime, my sweet Orihime._

_I think about you every single day. And every time I see your face, I wake and it almost brings me to tears. I feel like we haven't spoken in years. You know, Orihime, you'll always be perfect and you'll always be beautiful. And I know my heart will never forget you. I guess you never belonged with me, but it will never be quite clear to me why fate called our names. _

_It just doesn't seem right. Was it really our time? Am I dreaming? I'll never let go of you. I wish you were here but I guess that the place by my side is not the place for an angel like you. I guess I just have to move forward, but my love lies with you, my soul flies with you, Orihime._

. **. x X x . **.

_Onna, you'll never be alone. When darkness comes, I'll light the night with stars. You'll know I'm never far._

. **. x X x . **.

_Orihime,_

_I can hear you talking to me. Saying things like, "Sad boy. You stare up at the sky, when no one's looking at you. You wear your every last disguise, and when that fails, Ulquiorra…you fly and then you fall through again for false attention. Again, you're breaking inside."_

. **. x X x . **.

_Orihime,_

_There's so many things that I could say, but I'm sure it would come out all wrong. You've got something that I can't explain. Still, I try and try and let you know. The first week we spent, I don't think I will ever forget. We were just looking for any kind of reason to escape all the mess that we thought was what made us. Isn't it funny now? We can see we're who we're meant to be._

_There are too many times I have to say I could have been better and stronger for you and me, but you always make me feel okay. Those late nights we spent, stayed up talking. I'd ask, "Do you think we'll ever make it?" You say, "I'm sure, if it's right." Isn't it funny to think just how stupid I used to be? I hope you always believe._

_This is my dream. Let them talk and talk and talk, let them say what they want. We will laugh at the thought; they don't know what we have. Every year that goes by, a year older we'll be, still together. You'll still be beautiful then. Bless your beautiful heart. We'll talk and talk and talk - how crazy is it that someone could waste their whole life helplessly, just patiently waiting for a love like you and me?_

_Orihime, you still have all of my heart_.

. **. x X x . **.

Ulquiorra laid down his pen, looking at the papers scattered around him. His black hand cramped as his eyes flicked to the papers that had drifted to the floor, fluttering onto the odd surface as he hastily ripped them from the pad to get to his next letter.

_Now what?_

He had said all he wanted to say; he did not know what the Caja de Negación had planned for him next. _Am I to go to yet another world? Am I doomed to travel this way for the rest of my existence – dimension-hopping until the day I die?_

_Will I never see the Onna again?_

Just as he thought that, Ulquiorra heard something. His head snapped up, and he listened carefully. A voice he recognized floated through the chamber. _Tôsen._

"Tentei Kura."

_That is the Kido Soul Reapers use like a large broadcasting system, _Ulquiorra remembered, but then a voice even more familiar to him could be heard, a voice that sent chills down his furry spine.

"Can you hear me, intruders?"

_Aizen._

Ulquiorra pushed back his chair and stood quickly, his tail flicking behind him. As he put weight on the floor, the material sent white energy crackling across the surface from where he stood, although it was entirely two-dimensional.

"First, allow me to compliment you for defeating so many Espadas," Aizen's voice announced. Ulquiorra realized that Aizen must be broadcasting his voice throughout Hueco Mundo. _How many Espada were dead?_ "And now…we will begin our invasion of the World of the Living."

He paused, and the next sentence seemed to be aimed particularly at Ulquiorra.

"I'll leave Orihime Inoue in the fifth tower. If you want to save her, come and get her. She is no longer of any use to me."

Ulquiorra's hands curled into fists, his sharp talons almost breaking the skin on his wrists.

"Her abilities are astonishing. Her rejection of phenomena transcends the powers allowed to human beings. The high officials recognized the significance of her ability early on. That is why I took her. Her abduction provoked a crisis in the Soul Society, prompting them to withdraw to defend the Soul Society and abandon the World of the Living. I used her as bait to lure the so-called Deputy Soul Reaper and his friends to Hueco Mundo. Now they and the four captains who entered Hueco Mundo to help them have been successfully confined, thanks to her."

Ulquiorra realized what was coming next before Aizen even had a chance to say it.

"The great thing about the 13 Court Guard Companies is that all thirteen captains possess the powers of a major fighting force. But now three have seceded and four more are trapped in Hueco Mundo."

Ulquiorra could hear the smirk in Aizen's voice, and mouthed the next sentence with him.

"_It's safe to say that Soul Society's strength has been reduced by half."_

Aizen continued alone. "It was simple, really. Now we will destroy Karakura Town, create the Ouken, and bring down the Soul Society. Once that has been accomplished, we can destroy the rest of you at our leisure."

There was a moment of silence. Even here in the Caja de Negación, Ulquiorra could feel the Shinigami reeling from the blow.

_There is no hope for them. Orihime from the future was wrong. There is no way – _no way – _that Soul Society will win this battle._

A new voice rumbled through the room, and Ulquiorra recognized it as the voice of the Head Captain Yamamoto. Aizen must have opened a Garganta and entered the World of the Living. "It looks like we made it in time."

"In time? Why do you say that?" Aizen asked. "I know that isn't the real Karakura Town. But that won't stop us. Starrk…Barragan…Halibel...come."

_So at least they're still alive._

"If Karakura has been transported to the Rukongai, we will eliminate you…and create the Ouken in the Soul Society. It's that simple."

Now, Ulquiorra sensed his intent. He raised one hand in the air above him, walking until his fingernail touched the wall of the room.

"Until then, I leave Las Noches in your hands…"

Ulquiorra pressed against the wall. The material cracked under his razor sharp talon, pieces crumbling away. He continued to reach, and as his body passed through the wall into Hueco Mundo's air, the fur melted away, leaving him in his Arrancar form.

"…Ulquiorra."

He swept the rest of the barrier away, stepping through and quickly asserting his situation. He was in Aizen's throne room, which was empty, save for a lone figure at the end. He rested his eyes on her and did not pull them away as he spoke.

"_Yes, sir."_

Orihime turned her frightened eyes toward him at the sound of his voice, and they stared for a moment.

_Hello, my love.  
_

**PLEASE DROP ME A REVIEW! Thanks...-tcwth**


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N: FML.**

**This whole situation is just a failure among failures. For real. I am so sorry and I know Moony is too. We both feel pretty bad about making yall wait for so long and I'm just so sorry. **

**That said we tried to give a bit of a longer chapter today and I appreciate your patience. :D**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

* * *

The silence in the room atop the fifth tower seemed to actually make noise. It thundered in Ulquiorra's ears, loud as a tide of water. He stood impassively, facing the Onna, gauging her wide, silver eyes.

"Onna."

His lips twitched suddenly, like a cartoon animation. There was a flash of pink tongue behind them as he mouthed the two syllables.

"Orihime Inoue."

She jerked as if she had been stung by a bee. He took a step forward and she shrank back a bit.

"Do you…know who I am?"

He couldn't resist asking the question. It had been weighing him down since she had been ripped from him.

"Do you recognize my face?"

He took another step towards her, bigger than the one before it. She flinched.

"Do you know my name?"

He was still some distance away but he stopped walking. He could sense that she was a bit uncomfortable.

_"Do you remember me?"_

His eyes locked on hers and held, unwavering. She drew in a shuddering breath.

"Your name…" she breathed, the words a soft whistle between her lips. "Your name is…Ulquiorra."

Hope bloomed within his chest, warming him from the inside for a moment. The heat died away but he was still undeniably pleased.

He nodded once, keeping his expression neutral. Inside his pockets, however, his fingers clenched. He never took his eyes off of hers.

"You…you were the one who wrote me those letters," she continued in a quiet voice.

A short nod. Ulquiorra didn't elaborate any further on that. They stood in silence for a moment. Orihime seemed to be soaking in his face.

"You…you are the fourth Espada," she said. "Not Grimmjow-nii's Fracción…"

Ulquiorra shook his head slowly.

"…Thank you for the red bean paste," she said.

"Onna."

She jumped, startled at his voice.

"You don't remember me."

Her eyes dropped. "…No," she admitted. She twisted her hands. "No, I don't."

"Onna, are you afraid?"

Her eyes jumped back to his, and she stared at him.

"Lord Aizen doesn't need you anymore," he said. He took a step closer. "There is nothing protecting you now. You could die here…alone, with no one by your side. I want to know if that frightens you."

She held his eyes as he stepped closer. There was only about two feet between them.

"I'm not afraid," she finally pronounced. "I don't believe you would kill me."

"…You don't know that for sure," Ulquiorra said. "I could do it. I could tear open this chest of yours, I could tear open your skull."

"You will not," she said, but her voice sounded uncertain. "I don't think you could do that."

"What makes you believe that?" he asked her quietly. "All the memories of me that you have? All the knowledge of me that you have gained?"

"I read your letters," she reminded him.

"Orihime," he said. "You…you know nothing about me."

He turned, paced away from her, and then pivoted suddenly towards her again. "You have _no idea_," he said. His voice was slightly louder, but still neutral. "You have no idea what I've had to deal with since you've left me." Abruptly he yanked a hand from his pocket, formed a claw, held it out to her. "Do you see this?" he asked her. Her frightened gaze moved to his pale, empty hand. "This, in my hand. The heart you gave me."

He took a step closer.

"You may not have noticed it was gone. The empty cavity in your chest may have stilled without your note. But I have held it here these long weeks. Waiting until the day when I could return it to its rightful place."

Another step, and another. They were chest to chest, and he lifted her hand, turned her palm up. "This, another thing you may not have known," he said. "You have held my heart. And while you may not have noticed yours' absence, I noticed mine. I miss that feeling of life and love. While you have held my heart, Onna, holding it so innocently, so obliviously, it has been trampled. It has been kicked, stomped on. Mistreated. Not by you. By Nnoitra. By Loly and Menoly. By Szayelaporro, by Grimmjow, by Anómino and Ggio. Most of all, though, my heart has been mistreated by Aizen. Look at it, look at your hand. Don't you see how it shudders and thumps so unevenly? Look into my eyes now. Do you think my heart needs to be fixed, Orihime?"

She held her breath and held his eyes. Bit her lip and nodded.

He lifted a hand to her cheek, smoothed her jaw with his thumb. Took a deep breath, not letting his eyes leave hers. Her skin was soft under his hand like a forbidden fruit. "Will you help me?" he asked. "Will you help me heal my heart?"

She nodded again and her eyes began to slide closed. He leaned in and barely brushed her lips with his.

**BOOM**

Ulquiorra jerked around, feeling a massive Reatsu fill the room. From a black cloud emerged the intimidating figure of Ichigo Kurosaki. Cursing, Ulquiorra prepared himself for the inevitable confrontation between them.

Kurosaki landed on the floor and straightened up. His gaze flicked from Ulquiorra to Orihime and back.

"Kurosaki-kun…" she murmured.

Ulquiorra felt fury flash through him, white and hot, before he quenched it.

"Step away from Orihime," Ichigo commanded, his voice steely.

"I intended to." Ulquiorra looked him square in the eye, "My duty is to guard Las Noches until Lord Aizen returns. I wasn't ordered to kill the girl. I'll let her live until otherwise ordered. But not you. Protecting Las Noches means killing you. I'll cut you down right now."

His hand went to Murciélago and he pulled out the sword from her sheath. Kurosaki's eyes widened as he brought the blade to a ready position.

"I'm surprised," Kurosaki acknowledged with a grin. "I didn't think you'd draw your sword so easily. I thought I'd have to make you draw it. Does this mean you recognize me as an equal?"

"It means I recognize you as someone who must be destroyed," Ulquiorra corrected.  
"Works for me," Kurosaki said, grin still in place.

Ulquiorra jumped into action, making the first move. It was simply a motion to provoke his opponent to join their deadly dance. Kurosaki counterattacked quickly, but Ulquiorra had a definite upper hand. He was relentless, jabbing his blade at Kurosaki, who was dodging like a maniac. Ulquiorra was evaluating his motions carefully. The boy was definitely stronger now, a little bit stronger, at least, but still not strong enough. Ulquiorra decided to stay on the defense to get a better feel for Kurosaki's fighting style.

Kurosaki pressed him up against a boulder, a look of intense concentration on his face. Ulquiorra, however, was already bored with defense. He forced Kurosaki's blade to the side wit his own and gave a roundhouse kick over his head. When Ichigo ducked to the side, Ulquiorra jumped up and over, then started to come back at him.

"Getsuga Tensho!"

The black Reatsu covered the handle of the boy's blade and he swung it at Ulquiorra, who effortlessly cleaved it in half. The power split apart, hitting the tops of the pillars along the walls, making the dust and rubble explode off. Kurosaki's eyes widened as Ulquiorra Sonido'ed behind him, then thrust quickly and gracefully. Kurosaki blocked him just in time. After two more violent thrusts, unsettling the boy, he extended his index finger and began gathering Reishi in the tip. Kurosaki's eyes widened again.

"Cero."

The laser blasted through the wall of the tower, and Ulquiorra couldn't see anything for a moment. When the dust cleared, however, he saw Kurosaki – bent over a bit, breathing heavily, his clothing torn, but still standing.

"I see," he said, "So you can withstand my Cero even without your mask. You've gotten stronger. Is it because you defeated Grimmjow? Or…is it because of her?"

Ulquiorra swung his arm to point at Orihime in the corner, knowing where she was even without having to look. Kurosaki glared at him, his smug grin long gone from his face. He wiped his mouth with his hand, not saying anything yet.

"Or maybe because of your friends fighting down below?" Ulquiorra speculated further. Kurosaki glared some more, and Ulquiorra's eyes flickered to the girl in the corner, her beauty almost distracting him from the boy before him. He grounded himself and returned his attention to the fight. "…In any case, that girl is already one of us. Even if you manage to rescue her, that won't change.

Kurosaki straightened, his glare now with a hint of confusion. "…What?" he hissed through gritted teeth.

"Rescuing her is meaningless," Ulquiorra taunted.

Determination focused on the boy's face. "That's not up to you to decide!" he growled.

Goading the boy further, Ulquiorra amended, "You're right. Aizen-sama will be the judge of that."

Kurosaki attacked him quickly, but Ulquiorra soon gained the upper hand again, thrusting relentlessly at the boy. But now he was careless. Kurosaki's sharp, painful breathing distracted him from his brown eyes, moving, watching. He didn't see Kurosaki's hand coming until the boy grabbed his wrist and stilled his movements. Surprised, Ulquiorra looked at his face to see a smug grin. Then the black blade was brought whooshing upon him.

Ulquiorra felt a small nick of pain and leaped back. He glanced at his chest and saw a small cut, while the front of his uniform had been ripped to shreds. _Impressive that he even was able to cut me that much,_ he thought.

He raised his eyes to Kurosaki's. The boy looked mildly surprised.

"I barely nicked you," he said. "It's that Hierro thing, isn't it? Your skin sure is hard. But…looks like I can predict your movements better than before."

Ulquiorra's gaze focused on his face. "What?" he said guardedly.

"I couldn't predict what you were gonna do the last time we fought," Kurosaki explained. "Your attacks, defense, reactions, speed, direction…I couldn't predict any of that. I felt like I was fighting a stone statue. Am I able to predict those things because I'm closer to a Hollow now? Or …have you become more human?"

A murderous fury swept through Ulquiorra. _How dare he say that. How dare he say I am like a human._ He saw Kurosaki's grin, knew he was being provoked, and decided to fall for it anyways.

He stabbed his blade into the ground with so much force that the cement cracked. Once the dust cleared, and he could see Kurosaki's surprised face once more, he intoned:

"I? More human?"

He could sense Inoue behind him, her breathing quick and frightened.

"I see. So you're actually feeling good about being able to fight at this level?" he challenged, and then leapt into the air.

Panic overtook Kurosaki's features, and Ulquiorra swiped at him, putting a little more effort into it. It was obviously much more difficult for Kurosaki to keep up, however, and Ulquiorra was sure he would be able to finish this fight much more quickly than even he had anticipated. He raised his blade for the finishing blow and began to execute it.

His arms were jolted back with such force that he actually felt his forearms crack a little, although they regenerated instantly. He barely even noticed the pain, such was his emotion at the cause.

An orange triangle had appeared before Kurosaki, and was now slowly crumbling away. Some distance apart from them, Inoue was standing with her hands outstretched defiantly, her attention focused on the fighting figures.

Ulquiorra met her eyes, hoping his sense of betrayal was evident within them. She also met his gaze, her eyes unwavering.

"What are you doing?"

She straightened in surprise. "…What?"

"I'm asking why you helped him," Ulquiorra pressed, keeping his eyes on hers.

"…I…why?" Orihime stammered, unable to look away from him. His irritation grew, coupled with the betrayed feeling.

"Because he's your friend?" he persisted; "then why didn't you protect him from the first blow? Why did you hesitate?"

She gaped at him, thoughts running behind her eyes a million miles a minute. "I…I don't…"

"You don't know?" he asked. "Then let me tell you. You –"

"Shut up!"

Ulquiorra's eyes widened at Kurosaki's exclamation, and he looked at the boy behind him, tearing his eyes off of Inoue. Kurosaki looked exasperated as he chided the Espada like a small child.

"I don't need to hear you go on about hesitation or whatever," Kurosaki reprimanded Ulquiorra. "None of that matters. Thank you for protecting me, Inoue. But it's dangerous, so stay back."

"Kurosaki-kun…" she murmured behind Ulquiorra, who tensed again at her utterance of his name. _Does she know? Does she know what she does to me every time she says it like that?_

"Ulquiorra."

Ulquiorra's glance flicked to Kurosaki's.

"You're pretty chatty today. I'm surprised. I thought you were more of the silent type."

He began to ready another Getsuga, and Ulquiorra sighed, watching the power grow on the blade. "Getsuga, eh?" he murmured, "don't you realize yet that doesn't work on me?"

Kurosaki came at him anyway, and Ulquiorra was surprised for a moment. Instead of releasing the energy, Kurosaki appeared to be storing it on the blade, preparing for impact with the attack powered up on his blade. He shook his head and recovered quickly.

The blow shook the room, and Ulquiorra needed to keep both hands on his blade with the strength of it. But it still was barely strenuous. _Instead of releasing Getsuga, he kept it in his sword…so the blows have the power of Getsuga behind them…_ "Not so fast," he said aloud. With one sweep of his sword he brushed the great amount of power away like an unfortunately irritating insect.

"You seem to have think you've come up with something here," Ulquiorra droned. "But have you forgotten? Even with your mask on, your Getsuga couldn't defeat me. Without your mask, it doesn't matter how you use it, it still won't work."

Ichigo flew back. Ulquiorra was preparing for another attack when he heard a loud rip. His head jerked over to see Inoue.

She was with Loly and Menoly, the two Arrancar females who had terrorized her earlier. Her eyes were wide with fear. The dark haired menace – he couldn't remember which one she was – had ripped off the puff of her sleeve.

"Inoue!" Kurosaki shrieked.

Ulquiorra was silent. He was working hard to keep his face calm. He knew Loly and Menoly would kill the Onna if they got a chance. They had been jealous since she was first brought to the castle – jealous of her familial relationship with their Lord, Aizen-sama. Kurosaki readied himself to fly at the two of them, calling over his shoulder at Ulquiorra, "Who are they?" like they had suddenly become friends.

"Stay back!" the dark-haired one screamed; "or I'll pluck out her eyeball!"

"Getsuga…!" Kurosaki began.

_NO! Is he an idiot?! There is no way he will be able to hit just the two Arrancars and not Inoue! Fool!_

Ulquiorra flash-stepped in front of Kurosaki, stopping his movements from continuing. His eyes widened, along with the dark-haired girl's.

"Ulquiorra…?" she asked.

"Don't get the wrong idea," he nearly spit, "I'm not helping you."

Kurosaki attacked him from behind, and Ulquiorra blocked him disinterestedly.

"Outta my way!" Kurosaki roared.

Ulquiorra's eyes rolled to meet his. "Make me," he challenged lazily. "If you want to fight anyone else, you'll have to kill me first."

"SHUT UP! GET OUT OF MY WAY!" Kurosaki was livid, spit flying from his mouth.

Ulquiorra opened his mouth, preparing to argue further. Suddenly, though, the ground shook. Ulquiorra turned his head disinterestedly as the floor broke upwards from below and Yammy's massive figure could be seen, squatting his landing with a grin.

"Ulquiorra!" the big man exclaimed. "I've come to help!"

"When did I ever ask for your help, Yammy?" Ulquiorra asked him. Inside, he was cursing. All these flies kept coming and ruining their battle. He just wanted to kill Kurosaki and be done with it so he could get back to his woman, but no. _Trash, all of them._ He glanced at Orihime out of the corner of his eye. _Well, not her._

"Don't say that," Yammy said, undiscouraged. "Looks like that Shinigami brat's gotten a lot stronger. Let me take care of him."

Ulquiorra stared at the giant Espada wordlessly, but he was seething. _Is he implying that I cannot handle this trash on my own?_ he ranted; _he would be dead by now if not for all these interventions! He would have been dead hours ago, his corpse would be cold on the ground in the desert!_

"…I see," he said finally, not acknowledging Yammy's offer. "It appears you've recovered. But, your job isn't here. You can go back to sleep or you can take care of the captains down below." He turned his back on the giant.

"What? Don't be so stingy, Ulquiorra!"

"The way you get like this is your biggest weakness," Ulquiorra murmured.

"Yeah…" Yammy half-agreed, and then he looked over and saw the two girls, the two Arrancar, the ones who had beaten Orihime. Loly and Menoly. Yammy stared at them for a moment.

Then his hand went for Menoly's face and the smaller girl went flying back into the wall. Dust bloomed from where she hit, and Loly screamed her name loudly.

"Ulquiorra! What are these bitches doing here?" Yammy yelled excitedly at the smaller man.

"Ask them," Ulquiorra said disinterestedly, turning back to his own fight.

It didn't take long though. No sooner had he trained his attention on Kurosaki again than the boy went rushing for the tenth Espada, yelling, "Inoue!" like he was planning to save the Onna right then and there. Lazily, Ulquiorra Sonido'd in front of him and blocked his black blade.

"What a pest," he droned, "I said you'll have to beat me first."

Behind them, Loly and Yammy's battle took it up a notch, although Ulquiorra's attention didn't waver. The two locked eyes and Ulquiorra heard explosions and then Yammy's voice saying, "Hey, Ulquiorra, can I kill her now?"

Ulquiorra was about to give his permission when Kurosaki let out a strangled cry and Ulquiorra whirled around to see Yammy hovering over the Onna with Loly nowhere in sight. Before he could stop the large man he felt a strange reatsu envelop them and looked up to see the silhouette of the Quincy in the hole blasted through the wall.

A single arrow penetrated Yammy's shoulder as Kurosaki yelled "Ishida!" at the top of his lungs.

Yammy twisted around and bellowed, "Where did you come from?!"

Ishida straightened after a flawless landing, quickly straightening his glasses and brushing some dust off of his flawless white uniform. "That much force and it still didn't pierce you?" he said with a small smile; "you're pretty tough. But…I'd watch where I step, if I was you."

Yammy did not even have time to react. The ground blew out from under his feet, spraying up lights and sounds. Desperately, Yammy managed to grab onto the corner of the floor where he had been standing.

"That mad scientist gave me a special land mine just for Arrancars," Ishida explained simply.

"Damn it…" Yammy wheezed, "…you little brat!"

"I could hear you down below," the Quincy said, and he sounded almost disgusted. "You're the "Yammy" Szayelaporro told me about, aren't you?"

"So what if I am?" Yammy gasped angrily.

"Too bad for you," the former stated. "If I hadn't shown up, you would have gotten to fight a little longer."

The floor crumbled under Yammy's giant fingers at that moment. With a loud cry, the giant Arrancar fell a hundred stories, down to the desert floor. Ulquiorra could hear floors breaking under his muscled back. The Quincy smirked and straightened his glasses again, his bow shimmering into nothing but a small bracelet around his thin wrist.

"Mala suerte," he said. "I pity you. I broke all the pillars on every floor on the way up, so you'll probably fall all the way down to the bottom." The large Arrancar could no longer hear him, so he turned and began to walk back to Kurosaki and Ulquiorra.

"…Ishida?" Kurosaki inquired.

"What?" Ishida asked. "Questions during battle? Seems a bit reckless to me. What do you want to ask? Kurotsuchi Mayuri healed me. He healed Abarai first, which is what took me so long. He's the one who gave me the mine too. If an Arrancar comes within its spirit energy sensors, it will explode. I hid it in the ceiling of the level below us. Any other questions?"

_The boy is intelligent,_ Ulquiorra thought to himself. _But at the end of the day…he is just trash._

Kurosaki grinned abruptly. "I never had any in the first place," he said, "you're the one who wouldn't shut up …what a pain."

He turned back to face Ulquiorra.

_Finally._

"Take care of Inoue," he said. "If her Rikka can't shield her from my energy, protect her with your own body."

_She can take care of herself. She is a strong woman._

"I would even if you hadn't asked," Ishida said grimly.

Kurosaki turned to face Ulquiorra, whose expression had not changed all the while.

"…Sorry to keep you waiting, Ulquiorra," he apologized. "Here I go. The Hollowfication you wanted to see." He raised one hand to his face, knuckles crunched, into position at his forehead. Then he cut violently down and out, and the white mask appeared upon his features. Ulquiorra's eyes widened marginally; it was much more powerful than it had been previously. Then, before he could even realize, he was on the defense, fighting to keep Kurosaki's blade away from his skin.

_**OUCH!**_

Ulquiorra heard his blade's cry of pain in his mind and he saw that somehow, Kurosaki's Zangetsu had managed to split his own. The crack was small but definite.

_Kurosaki is stronger than me,_ he realized.

_I need to go above the dome._

_I need to release Murciélago. _

Ulquiorra flipped backwards over Kurosaki, shooting out through the gap in the wall and skidding in the air. Next, he bounded upwards, soaring up the tower towards the false canopy. He could feel Kurosaki's reatsu follow him after a second, confused, but still massively powerful. As he flew, he decided – _one more test._

On the tip of his finger, Ulquiorra charged a massive Cero and fired it immediately. The green blast lit everything up, and there was a sonic boom. But when the scene cleared, he could see Kurosaki standing with his blade up, blocking his body.

_And there is not even a crack in his mask?_

…Damn.

Ulquiorra took off for the canopy even faster. He could hear Kurosaki's loud protests behind him, but he did not slow.

_Quincy,_ he prayed, _do not come up here. Do not bring the Onna after us. Do as I say…keep her safe._

He burst through the canopy into the eternal night.

_Keep her safe._


	16. Chapter 16

**Cripes, look at the day. It's been like ...too long since we updated. Sorry. Although I probably would have been more motivated if I'd gotten two reviews to rub together... (/*A*)/ -flips table- Well, the struggle continues.**

**Luckily, this is the last chapter before the epilogue :'D So you won't have to deal with us much longer ;A;**

**I have been having fun anticipating the Spring Fever Tour. Anyone else going? (Doubt it.) But who can go wrong with You Me At Six, Mayday Parade, Pierce the Veil and All Time Low? That's tomorrow night, BAM! So pumped.**

**Anyway, I will let you read now ~ Ta ta ~**

**Please don't forget to review~ and check out moonlightrurouni's as well!**

* * *

Ulquiorra alighted on top of a tall pillar as Kurosaki broke through the canopy. Even from this distance, Ulquiorra could see the boy's glowing yellow eyes widen.

"Is this…Las Noches's canopy?"

"Yes," Ulquiorra confirmed, squaring his stance to face Kurosaki. "Under the canopy, two things are forbidden. The first is the Gran Rey Cero, which only the Espadas can employ. And the other is the release of Espadas beyond Cuatro. Both are so powerful, they could destroy Las Noches itself."

Kurosaki only watched, his eyes guarded behind the white and red mask. Ulquiorra raised his blade and pointed it at the boy."

"Enclose, Murciélago."

His massive black reiatsu splattered out from the dome, raining pure power onto the boy below. Ulquiorra could feel his bone helmet melting, reshaping itself over his head. His back splitting, two great black wings unfurling from the cavity his broken skin revealed. His uniform molded together, and the fabric danced around his thin ankles.

Kurosaki's eyes were wide as death.

"Don't panic," Ulquiorra ordered. "Don't break your stance. Be aware of your surroundings. Don't let your guard down, even for an instant."

His fingers formed a loose claw at his side, and he let the power gather into a glowing green javelin. In less time than Kurosaki could have blinked, Ulquiorra had flown at him, holding the weapon to his neck. Kurosaki jerked back, and Ulquiorra was pushed away by the boy's sudden release of power. He retreated to a safe distance and watched his power swirl to a calm.

"You instinctively used Getsuga," he noted. "A wise move. If you hadn't, your head would be at my feet now."

Kurosaki watched him, breathing heavily. His mask had cracked away from his right eye, and blood was collecting above his eyebrow.

"Your Hollowfication abilities have increased," Ulquiorra continued. "You're able to keep the mask on longer too. But I didn't think it would shatter so easily."

He reared his hand back. Another javelin was already forming there.

"_How unfortunate."_

The lance struck Kurosaki in the shoulder, tossing him backwards like a football. The boy struggled to shove his blade in the dirt and slow his backwards acceleration, but it was to little avail. Ulquiorra formed yet another lance, but this time he held onto it and used it like a sword to attack Kurosaki.

"Kurosaki…Fire Getsuga," he commanded in a murmur.

The boy's eyes widened.

"That's when you are at your most lethal. If Getsuga is your ultimate technique, fire it at me right here, right now. I'll show you which of us is stronger."

_And this isn't even all I have._ He allowed himself to gloat for less than a second.

Kurosaki's eyes narrowed, and he fended Ulquiorra back. Retreating to the ground, he glared up at the fourth Espada, circling in the sky.

"Fire Getsuga? Give me a break," he snorted. "You didn't have to ask, I was gonna do that anyways!"

The boy's bravado startled Ulquiorra. However, when he fired his attack, Ulquiorra was able to bat it away quite easily. He looked down at the stunned boy, feeling a bit bored and disappointed.

"Just as I suspected," he stated. "You're just a puny human after all."

"You're…not hurt? !" Kurosaki exclaimed, his coarse Hollowfied voice sharp with surprise.

Ulquiorra ignored the question, as he thought the answer was quite obvious. "Your Black Getsuga is indeed very much like our Cero blasts."

Kurosaki's eyes narrowed angrily. "Don't compare it to something like that," he growled.

"I see, you haven't seen it yet," Ulquiorra said. "Then I'll show you, as a parting gift. This is what we Espadas can discharge in a released state." He raised one fingernail, pointing squarely at Kurosaki. "A…black…Cero."

He narrowed his eyes.

_Cero Oscuras!_

The energy hurtled towards Kurosaki like a great black vacuum, shattering the remains of his mask instantly. As the boy fell headfirst to the ground, Ulquiorra appeared in front of him like a fallen angel, and kicked him into the pillar. Kurosaki broke through the wall in a cloud of rocks and smoke and lay coughing there in the dust as Ulquiorra floated outside.

"Do you understand now?" Ulquiorra said as the boy struggled to his knees. "No matter how similar your appearance or techniques may be to an Arrancar's, they're as different as heaven and hell. It's understandable that humans and Shinigami would mimic Arrancars in order to increase their power. But, you will never be our equals."

He stepped inside the pillar, where Kurosaki was shakily making his way to his feet. He raised weary eyes to Ulquiorra's, grasping his blade.

"Getsuga –" he began.

"_I'm telling you – it's useless!" _Ulquiorra screamed. He attacked furiously now, swiping Kurosaki's flesh, driving him back with violent slashes until the boy lay nearly dead on the ground. Grasping him by the throat, Ulquiorra hauled him up, holding him so that his legs dangled uselessly inches above the ground.

"Why won't you drop your sword?" Ulquiorra fumed. "Even faced with such an insurmountable imbalance of power, you still believe you can defeat me?"

Kurosaki paused.

"…Imbalance of power?" he said slowly, finding the words. A small grin began to leak across his face. "…What about it? You thought I'd give up just because you're stronger than me?"

Ulquiorra allowed surprise to flit briefly across his face.

"I knew from the start you were strong. Knowing how strong you are makes no difference. I'm going to beat you, Ulquiorra."

Ulquiorra was silent for a moment. Then he opened his fist, and Kurosaki collapsed on the ground.

"Nonsense," he said hollowly. "Ichigo Kurosaki, those are the words of one who doesn't know true despair. But I'll teach you. This is what…_true despair…_looks like."

_Aah.._ Murciélago sighed as he shifted into his second release. Black fur sprouted from his waist, all up and down his arms and legs. Tears ran from his eyes and from his enlarged hollow hole upon his bare chest. The helmet shrank into two long horns on his head, and a tail whipped at his back.

"_Resurrección Segunda Etapa," _he explained darkly to the stunned boy before him. "Of all the Espadas, only I have achieved a second stage release. I haven't let Lord Aizen see me in this state yet."

Kurosaki's eyes hardened, and he grasped the handle of his blade, beginning to stand.

"Yet even facing me like this, you still have the will to fight," Ulquiorra mused. His eyes darted down to the black blade gripped in Kurosaki's hands, and saw that it was shaking.

_He's not so confused that he can't feel fear. And those aren't the eyes of a man who's given up. Does this mean he actually believes he can win? _

"Very well," he said out loud. "Then…I will show you my strength. Even if I have to turn your body to dust."

He flew at the boy, so fast Kurosaki never saw it coming. One hand grasped the side of his head, and he threw the boy into the pillar. Before he even realized what was going on, Ulquiorra had grabbed his blade with his bare hands and pushed him quickly away, into the ground.

"You're a fool, Ichigo Kurosaki," he murmured.

Kurosaki leaped into the sky, staring down at him in silence. Ulquiorra followed him, arms outstretched.

"You're challenging an enemy you can't possibly defeat," Ulquiorra said. "Your belief in your ability to win is beyond my comprehension."

With a small push, he sent Kurosaki flying backwards through two more pillars. Slowly he followed him, coming to a stop in front of the boy's body.

"If this is what you people call 'heart'…it would seem to be more of a liability than a strength," Ulquiorra mused. "For having heart, you will pay the ultimate price."

"I'm not fighting because I think I can win," Kurosaki said. He was on his feet again, albeit shakily. "I'm fighting because…_I have to win."_

"Nonsense."

Ulquiorra moved so fast Kurosaki had no time to react. His great tail wrapped around the boy's neck, and he leapt up to the top of the nearest pillar. Two new reatsus enveloped him: one sweet and soft, and one hard and bright. The woman and the Quincy. But he had eyes for only her.

"You're here, woman," he murmured, casting one small glance down at her. Her gray eyes were wide, glistening and shocked.

"K-Kurosaki…kun?" she whimpered. The sound carried all the way to his sensitive ears, the boy's name scraping like broken glass.

"You're just in time," Ulquiorra said. He raised his finger to Ichigo's chest. "Watch closely. The man you pinned all your hopes on is about to die."

Energy began spiraling around his fingertip. The woman's eyes widened impossibly as she realized what was going to happen.

"NO!" she screamed.

But it was too late.

And then, suddenly, it wasn't. Ulquiorra felt something rip through his tail, and Kurosaki fell from his grip. His Cero fired, but Kurosaki was not there to receive the attack. And in fact, when the smoke cleared, Kurosaki was not there at all. Ulquiorra's eyes swept around the dome, and he saw Kurosaki lying still at the bottom of the pillar. He prepared to jump down, but held back when he saw a figure appear in front of the woman.

"Anónimo-chan?" Inoue said in shock, recognizing the figure. And now that she said it, Ulquiorra recognized the girl too. But there was something wrong with the shy, kindhearted Arrancar girl from before. She stood tall, shoulders back, in an intimidating stance. And her white uniform was stained red. And her eyes were empty.

"What happened to you?" Inoue asks.

"I was following Barragan-sama's orders. Just as I do now." Her voice is dead. Robotically, she reached up and attempted to wipe blood from her cheek, but she only succeeded in smearing it further. Her hand descended, and her empty eyes moved to stare at her bloody fingers. "So curious," she murmured, "how the dead can bleed…It's funny. It's been so long since I've seen blood. I forgot how red it was. Its scent –"

Inoue grabbed her wrist, pulling it down, and forcing the Arrancar to look at her. "Anó-chan. What's going on? That's not like you." she snapped. Her voice shook.

"'Anó-chan'? Inoue-san, what's going on?" the Quincy asked from behind her. His face was guarded, and his voice growled, "Who is she? What do you mean '-chan'?"

"Something is going on here," Ulquiorra murmured to himself. "Something is very wrong."

"Vanish, Recuerdos Perdidos."

Ulquiorra stared, a bit surprised as he saw Anónimo's released state for the first time. Her attire did not change at all, but instead of behind held, her zanpakuto had now become a bracelet, the blade extending from the underside of her wrist. Her circlet mask fragment had expanded, a single light blue jewel resting in the center of it. But the most noticeable - and disturbing - part of her release were the two tentacles that hung from the sides of her head, almost like two thick pigtails. They moved slowly and hypnotically, unnaturally pale and with almost translucent suction cups at their ends. Ulquiorra opened his mouth to say something when they suddenly lash outward, knocking the Onna flat on her back.

"Inoue-san!" the Quincy shouted from behind her, sprinting to catch her before she fell. Ulquiorra turned his attention away from the two and watched from above as Anónimo's tentacle-growths slithered toward the unconscious boy lying forgotten at the base of the pillar. The boy woke up with a scream, hands shooting up to claw at the tentacles suctioned to his head.

The Quincy drew and fired an arrow at Anónimo at lighting speed. She easily deflected it away. "What are you doing?" he demanded angrily, drawing and loading another arrow.

Anónimo ignored him.

The Onna's voice sounds strangled. "Ano…chan?" she choked out, unable to rip her eyes from the writhing boy on the ground.

"Forget your mission. Forget her. Forget your reason, your logic. Forget it all, and unleash the instinctive beast within you," Anónimo murmured, her ice blue reiatsu flaring around her. She took a step for the boy and reached for his face with one glowing hand, her tentacles still firmly attached to his head. Kurosaki's eyes were wide in confusion and animalistic fear as he weakly glared up at her. His irises were fluctuating between chocolate brown and a cold gold color.

"What…the hell…are you doing to me?" he coughed out before letting loose a howl of agony as her fingertips touch his forehead.

The Onna leapt out of the Quincy's arms and to her feet. "Anónimo-chan, onegai, stop!" Breaking into a run, she reached out to the vacant Arrancar, but before she can reach her, another burst of reiatsu sends her tumbling to the ground., followed by an unearthly wail. Ulquiorra's eyes were glued, unmoving, to the scene.

And then Kurosaki was on his feet again.

But it wasn't Kurosaki.

The beast that had risen was no longer a human. Nor was it a Shinigami, though it did have some tatters of the uniform Kurosaki had been clad in around its waist. No, the form resembled a Vasto Lorde more than anything else, with a white body with black designs drawn on, red furry cuffs, and a mask that encased its entire face. Its eyes were empty.

"…What?" whispered the woman.

Ulquiorra could only stare. "This…can't be," he murmured. "You can't be alive. What is that form? Who are you?"

The beast did not answer. Instead, he held out one taloned hand, and Kurosaki's sword flew into it. Anónimo's eyes narrowed, and she hissed, "Kill him. Serve me."

Ulquiorra ignored her. "Can't you hear me?" he asked, "I am asking you who you are."

The beast roared then, an inhuman scream that rattled Ulquiorra's eardrums. Ulquiorra lifted a hand.

"It seems…you can't understand what I'm saying," he said lowly. A Cero began to form at his fingertips, and he was opening his mouth to utter the command when the beast lowered its head. Between its horns, a red ball of energy began to form. And at the same time, they fired their lasers, meeting in the middle in an unholy storm of power.

Inoue and the Quincy were shrieking in the background, but Ulquiorra could only watch in disbelief.

_Impossible. That was undoubtedly a Cero blast! One strong enough to quash an Oscura! But that can't be. He looks like a Hollow, but he is a human. And no human can discharge a Cero._

Before he could continue that thought, he sensed someone – some_thing_ – behind him and whipped around to see _it_ standing there. He thrust out his arm to attack, but the beast grabbed it and tore his arm right from his body. Quickly Ulquiorra flew back, ignoring the pain since he knew it would soon be gone, and landed on the ground, breathing hard.

_What…what IS this?_

He flung out his stump to the side and a new arm emerged. He flexed his new fingers several times, then turned to explain to the beast. Wondering if he could even hear him, if he could even understand, Ulquiorra said, "My most amazing ability isn't offensive. It's regeneration. We Arrancars sacrifice most of our regenerative abilities in order to enhance our other powers. Only I can regenerate my entire body except for my brain and internal organs at super fast speed. I don't know why you took that form. But no matter how your attacks have been boosted, if you have to tear off one of my arms to stop me and assess the situation, there's no way you can defeat me."

He took his arms and formed his fingers in a triangle before his chest, drawing them away slowly. A light shone out from his fingertips, revealing a long, white-green weapon with dancing flames at the end.

"Lanza del Relámpago," he murmured. The beast was still, standing impassively in the air, and Ulquiorra glanced up at it. "Don't come near me," he warned. "Stay where you are. I don't want to have to fire this at close range."

He drew back his arm and then threw the lance at the beast with a graceful arc. The bolt spun through the air, right for the beast's head, but he moved slightly out of the way.

The bolt spun past and landed in a spot fifteen football fields away. The explosion it made when it hit was tremendously violent, nonetheless.

Ulquiorra looked at the explosion, a sliver of regret on his face. "Damn, I missed," he observed. "It's difficult to handle."

On the sidelines, Anónimo watched expressionlessly.

Another weapon formed in his hand, and he heard the Quincy make a comment that he did not care about. Suddenly, with no warning, he sensed the beast right behind him.

"What?" _He slipped right through my Pesquisa? That wasn't Shunpo. That was Sonido._

The beast chucked Ulquiorra's arm at him, and he batted it aside in disgust.

"Did you think that would make me hesitate? Don't make me laugh," he chided. He thrust the new lance straight towards the beasts throat, but he held out his palm and –

_- stopped it._

_What? With his bare hand?!_

Slowly the beast's hand closed around the weapon, and his fingers squeezed tightly until the spear of light shattered into a million pieces. Before Ulquiorra could react, Kurosaki's sword was brought abruptly up and sliced his body in half.

In slow motion, Ulquiorra's body toppled to the ground. He stared up at the beast in surprise and disbelief.

"Damn it," he murmured. "I can't believe…I lost to a human turned Hollow. How…comical."

His breath was coming shorter now. Suddenly the beast's white, taloned foot slammed on top of Ulquiorra, and he bent over so that his horns were pointing at the Espada. Red energy began to form and swirl around him, and Ulquiorra closed his eyes for a moment.

"I see," he said. "No mercy, eh? How very Hollow-like." He opened his eyes again. "Go ahead. My life has no meaning now that I've lost to you."

The circle grew.

"_Do it."_

His world exploded.

* * *

_Dimly he realizes he is awake. But he is seeing as though he is underwater. People, figures around him move slowly, their bodies seeming to ripple across the night air. Stones poke his back, but he can barely feel them. The night stretches on, and then moon shines down in streaks, like the sun beneath the surface of the ocean._

_One person stands clear to his eyes; a woman in a green dress that floats around her like onion skin. She bears dark hair that is braided over one shoulder and she has wide, furious green eyes. Large bat wings extend behind her back, blocking the screams of the real world._

"_I am disappointed," she says to him._

_He blinks up at her, his eyes opening and closing slowly. But he speaks not a word. His lips feel glued together._

"_You have lost sight of yourself," she says to him, and points. He can see an orange-haired blur, hear her sorrowful wails. "You have lost sight of what this battle is about. You have allowed it to become for Aizen. You have allowed it to feed off of your hatred and your need to kill. You have forgotten what you truly should be fighting for; and that is the woman crying over there."_

_He feels his heart snap in his chest, as her words hammer into his chest. _

"_You cannot die," she says. "Not yet."_

I cannot move,_ he wants to say. _There is nothing I can do. My life has no meaning. I was killed by an individual that has no place in this world.

"_Your life has meaning."_

_His blurry vision tries to focus on __**her**__, but he can not. His eyes move back to the green-clad girl, her face patient but her eyes angry._

Why…?

"_You are a damn coward."_

_He tries to sit up. He cannot, he has no legs, no waist to bend at, no arms to support him._

I…

_He feels the nerves in his leg. Trying to push through, trying to grow. Like a sneeze that tickles his nose but doesn't finish, leaving him with a burning sensation he has to fight to get rid of._

I need to…

"_He is a monster now," she says, nodding at Kurosaki. "Are you going to be killed by a beast? A mindless animal?"_

_The individuals freeze, and they come into focus. He stills as he realizes what is about to happen. The beast is bent over the Quincy, Kurosaki's blade buried in the archer's chest. A Cero is frozen between his horns._

"_He is an ignorant murderer." Her voice is quiet, and she slinks around the beast, trailing her arms afterwards. "And he," she continues, squeezing the shoulder of the Quincy; "he is an honest boy, hardworking and intelligent. Yet, he is an independent individual. He is going to die at the hands of his friend, his friend who is now a monster."_

_But he doesn't care about them. His eyes settled on the orange haired woman._

"_And she. She is the words that you can't find," his Hollow spirit says. She dances to the human girl, the only true human here. "She is the one you have loved and lost. She is the one that places everything in her friends, the one who holds her companions above even herself. And now she is going to lose three of her best friends. Kurosaki Ichigo, Ishida Uryû, and you. Somewhere in her heart, she considers you a friend, and she has the potential to consider you more. But losing that potential is going to break her heart, snap it in two."_

Heart…?

"_Yes."_

_Renewed energy suddenly shocks through him, and the world fasts forward again, and everyone is moving, including him, including _Ulquiorra, who was moving through the air so fast he almost had no idea how he had gotten there. A lance was clutched in his hand, and with a mighty swing, he thrust it through the back of the pale, powerful Arrancar female, Anónimo.

He landed unsteadily on one foot, glancing around for Murciélago, but she had gone; back to her realm. He sent a quick note of gratitude for her and turned his attention back to the beast.

The built up Cero exploded before him, and Ulquiorra shielded his eyes. When the light dimmed, he was surprised at what he saw.

The mask cracked from around Kurosaki's face. His eyes were heavy-lidded, unconscious. But alive. The boy fell forward and was still.

He waited for the woman's cry of "Kurosaki-kun!" But none came. He looked over to see her kneeling over the body of the girl, bathed in a subtle blue light. The Quincy laid panting on a rock nearby, Kurosaki's black zanpakuto thrust through his middle.

Ulquiorra stood alone, his mind empty, not really thinking about what the woman was doing. He watched her silently, feeling one skeleton leg and one full leg project an image of faux health, health he knew was just for show, health he knew would not last.

Kurosaki's body suddenly seemed to come alive. His long hair evaporated, along with all the fur and Hollow markings. Even his giant hole Ulquiorra had blown in his chest closed with a loud _fwoop._

A normal boy lay there, in black rags, unconscious.

"The hole…closed?" the Quincy asked in disbelief.

"Super high speed regeneration?" Ulquiorra asked out loud, though it was rhetorical.

Kurosaki sat up very abruptly. His eyes opened, straining.

"Am I…?"

He touched his chest, his eyebrows furrowed, struggling to remember.

"Didn't I have a hole in my chest?"

That was when he noticed Ishida, impaled on his blade. He shot to his feet.

"Ishida…!"

"So you're finally yourself again," the Quincy observed with a sad smile of his own.

"That wound. Did I do it?"

"You're tough."

Ulquiorra's voice was strained, rough. Kurosaki turned to him, his eyes narrowing.

"Ulquiorra…" he started in a warning tone, before his expression turned to surprise at seeing his mangled state.

Wordlessly, Ulquiorra sonido'd over to the Quincy and yanked the black zanpakuto from his body, ignoring his cry of pain. He tossed it to Kurosaki, who let it land in the dirt, staring.

"Take it," Ulquiorra commanded hollowly. "Let's finish this."

The fight would end in his death, he knew. But he would prefer it to be at least a tiny bit honorable, instead of…this.

Kurosaki ignored his order. "Was I the one who stabbed Ishida?" he asked.

Ulquiorra formed another lance in his fist. "That is not my concern," he said. _Hurry up, boy, before I die._

"Your left arm and leg. Did I cut them off too?"

Ulquiorra only watched him. Kurosaki knew the answer, why should he repeat it?

The boy's eyes narrowed, and his jaw clenched. "If I did, then cut off my left arm and leg," he requested solemnly.

"Kurosaki!" the Quincy protested. Ulquiorra's eyes widened a fraction.

"The guy you were fighting before was me in a Hollowfied and unconscious state," Kurosaki explained. "It wasn't the real me. If we're gonna settle this, it won't be fair unless I'm in the same condition you are!"

"Kurosaki!" the Quincy barked. "Do you understand what you're saying, Kurosaki?"

Ulquiorra stared into the boy's brown eyes, boring into them. Kurosaki met his gaze evenly, daring him.

"Fine," Ulquiorra allowed. "If that's what you want, that's what you'll get."

He began to ready his lance, but felt a strange sensation. Twisting back, he viewed his wings disintegrating into ash. Regret seeped through him.

"Hmph," he said. "I guess this is it."

Kurosaki watched, eyes wide. Ulquiorra turned his attention back to the boy.

"Kill me."

Kurosaki was silent.

"Hurry up!" Ulquiorra barked. "I don't even have the strength to walk anymore. If you don't cut me down now, you'll never get the chance to settle this."

"No."

"What?" Ulquiorra asked.

"I said no!" Kurosaki said. "I_…I_ _don't wanna win like this!"_

His last words were yelled, cutting the still night air. Ulquiorra was silent. Then, he shook his head.

"To the very end, you never do what I want you to," he mused. Then, he dismissed the useless boy. Not cleaning up his mess. He held nothing but utter contempt for the Shinigami boy, if he was even that.

He stared holes in the woman now, the Onna. She had sat up from Anónimo's body, and the glow was gone. Her eyes held wonder and amazement and regret. Her eyes held love.

A lump was in his throat.

* * *

_They both sat quietly, each lost in their own thought._

_"You really love her, don't you," Grimmjow commented finally._

_Ulquiorra cut his eyes at Grimmjow, but didn't say anything. He didn't think Grimmjow was asking because he didn't know the answer._

_"I mean, your relationship isn't just making out all over the place," Grimmjow said. "There's emotion involved. You know, like she's the one you'd want to settle down with, if we all survive this crazy war."_

_Ulquiorra remained silent, but his mind was racing._

_"You know, like if we were human, you'd move into her apartment, you'd pray with her, you'd make her breakfast in bed, maybe you'd even have a kid or two," Grimmjow said. "You sure got dealt a fucked up hand, Ulquiorra. It could have been beautiful between you two."_

_"Are you trying to make me want things I can never have," Ulquiorra snapped. "Don't you know that being with her for the rest of my life is exactly what I want?"_

_"But in a way, you're lucky," Grimmjow said, ignoring him. "You really found the right person. Someone who you'd pick up their dirty underwear off the floor. Someone who you'd sit on your knees on the floor for an hour to talk to a dead person for. Someone you'd wake up early to cook for. Someone who you'd screw not just for fun, but because you really wanted to start something. You followin' me?"_

_Ulquiorra bit his tongue and looked away, trying not to imagine it, because it made his heart hurt._

_"I mean, I probably won't ever get a chance like that," Grimmjow added._

_"Don't say that," Ulquiorra finally said. "You listen to me, Grimmjow Jeagerjaques," he started in his flat voice, "When we get done with this war against the Shinigami that's what's going to happen. Me and Inoue are going to live together and she's going to remember everything, and even if she doesn't it's okay because we'll make lots of new memories. And you are going to live with the woman you loved, and still do, you just don't know it, and we are going to have the greatest life ever and Aizen Sôsuke will be dead and he won't care."_

_Grimmjow looked thoughtful._

_"Is that an offer, Ulquiorra Schiffer?" he asked._

_"It's a promise," Ulquiorra said firmly._

_Grimmjow rolled to the very edge of the bed and put out one hand. "Shake on it?"_

_Ulquiorra put out his hand, and the two men clasped hands and shook once._

_"Deal?" Grimmjow asked._

_"Deal."_

* * *

That would never happen now.

"Just when I was starting to think…" Ulquiorra began, but stopped. He couldn't finish. The pain in Orihime Inoue's eyes was so much that it almost hurt to look.

"Are you afraid of me, woman?"

She came to life then. Tears poured from her cheeks. Sobbing, she screamed his name and began to run towards him, yanking the black blade from the dirt where it had been tossed before Kurosaki, carrying it blade out before her.

And when she reached him, she buried the blade in his chest, to the shock of the three men watching her.

"You have to remember! Please! Please promise me you won't forget." Orihime pleaded him, hiccupping, her arms wrapped tightly around Ulquiorra's neck, her tears running from her eyes, to her cheeks and down his chest. "I'm sorry! I'm so, so, so sorry! I swear, I won't forget you again! Not now, not ever!" she cried, pulling away from him, just enough so that she can look into his eyes, which widened.

Hope blossomed in his chest.

"You remember me?"

Orihime nodded frantically, sniffling. Her breathing was uneven, heavy. "I do. I do. Wait for me, okay? Wait for me in the Soul Society, promise me, okay?" she whispered, licking her lips and pressing her forehead against his. Her hands cupped the back of his skull, warmth seeping into his thoughts.

"The Soul Society is a big place," he murmured quickly. He could feel his mind leaving this life, feel his consciousness slipping away. He struggled to form words while he could.

Orihime tightens her grip on him, pulling their bodies as close as she possibly can. "I'll find you. No matter how long it takes, I'll find you," she vowed fiercely through her tears, "I won't give up on you, just like how you didn't give up on me." She took a deep breath. "So promise me. That you'll wait."

"I promise."

Orihime smiles weakly, and presses her lips against his own in one last sweet kiss before his ash blew away on the wind.

_I promise. And I will never forget my promise to you…_

And then all that was left of Ulquiorra Schiffer, Sosuke Aizen's most powerful Fourth Espada, master of Emiko and Daisuke, partner to Murciélago, friend to Grimmjow Jeagerjaques and Tia Halibel, enemy to Ichigo Kurosaki, and lover of Orihime Inoue…was ash on the wind.

_What is heart?_

_Can I see it if I rip open this chest of yours?_

_If I crush your skull?_

_Will I find it there?_

_You humans speak of it so casually._

_As if…_

…

_I see._

_So this is it._

_This thing in the palm of my hand…_

_is_

_h  
e  
a  
r  
t._


	17. Epilogue

Cool breeze. Hair ruffling. Rough dirt under skull. A twitch of a finger, flutter of an eyelid.

His eyes opened.

All he could see at first was a sky. It was pure blue, white clouds floating serenely across light azure. Something within him stirred at the color, and the memory of a maniacal laugh vibrated through his chest. His eyes blinked, thick eyebrows drew together.

Slowly he raised himself up on his elbows, taking in his surroundings. He was in an empty marketplace, lying in the dirt in the middle of the clearing. Around him were clean, bare stalls, looking like they had been put up quite recently. Despite this, however, the market was completely empty. He looked down at himself. He had pale, pale skin, and he was rather skinny, though muscular. His nails - both on his hands and feet - were dark as the hair he could see in his peripheral vision, which he assumed was on the long side. An odd scar, about 4-5 inches in diameter and perfectly circular, rested in the middle of his chest. Strangely, he had a spiky 4 tattoo over his heart, which stirred something else within him, something else that he couldn't quite place. Lastly, he observed that he was completely naked, and looked around for something to cover himself with.

In the corner lay a burlap sack. He stood unsteadily, using his hands to support himself until the last second. Standing with his feet apart, he swayed, his vision blacking briefly as his level changed. Then he hobbled over to the sack, grabbing the tent and crouching to grab it. He ripped a seam at the top and two at the sides with his bare fingers, observing his muscles flex slightly, before sliding the sack over his head and tying the tunic with a piece of rope. The hem reached his knees, and he felt covered enough for the moment, allowing himself to think.

Who was he?

How had he gotten here?

He racked his brains. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't remember anything from before the soft breeze ruffling his face and hair. It wasn't like there was an empty space there, something that had been full before but was now cleared. It just felt like his memory capacity only had space for the last four minutes.

"Hey!"

He turned, somewhat unsteadily, and saw a little boy running toward him, maybe about six or seven years old. Behind him was his mother – or a woman he assumed was his mother – who looked to be in her mid-twenties or so. She followed her son at a safe distance, looking worried as she gazed at him, standing there in his burlap sack.

The little boy ran right up to him, putting dark brown arms on his hips. "What are you doing here? We won first pick, get outta here!"

"Josef, he's okay," the mother said. "Still," she said, looking at him, "Josef has a point. May I ask you what you're doing here?"

"If I knew, I assure you, I would tell you." His voice was froggy with disuse. His cleared his throat and spread his hands before him, indicating that he had nothing to hide. "I woke up just there a moment ago, and I seem to have amnesia which I hope is temporary."

The woman's worried look increased, but now he sensed sympathy. She ran a hand over her head. Her dark hair was cut close to her skull. Sighing, she closed her eyes and lifted her face to the sky.

"Josef, I think we are going to have to wait on picking the tent," she said. "We should get this man to the doctor."

* * *

The doctor was useless. He was tapped, peered at, poked, prodded. But no one could figure out how he had woken up in the field. They didn't think he'd been attacked, since except for the circular scar on his chest, he was completely devoid of injury. The doctor recommended that he stay with Josef and his mother, Fiona, for a while in hopes that he would soon recover.

The two of them agreed and took him back to their small hut where they lived. On the way back, Josef dubbed him first as "Hector-kun" and then "Emo-kun" when they arrived and he had yet to show an emotion. He didn't like either of them, to be honest. Emo-kun was obviously just a nickname, but Hector didn't sit right with him either.

It didn't matter. Hopefully he would be regaining his memories soon, and then he would know his true name again.

For now, he would settle with these two. But it soon became clear that there wouldn't be much settling. A mere four days later was to be the biggest festival of their area. And they had to prepare for it.

Hector was confused, but Fiona promised to explain everything to him later, while they worked. From the hut they walked back to the tented clearing, quickly selecting a large tent and unloading a small wagon they'd brought with them, setting up grills and cooking ware on the table that was placed inside the tent. Hector tried to help, but his fine motor skills were not completely back yet, and he ended up being more of a hindrance than aid.

"Ay! Josef-kun!"

The dark skinned boy looked up, his face breaking into a grin. "Kirito-kun!" he called. Hector turned to see a dark haired boy running toward Josef, feet slapping unafraid against the ground. He stopped before his friend, and the two boys went into an elaborate handshake that Hector couldn't follow. A man followed close behind Kirito-kun, and he went over to talk to Fiona. Slowly more and more people began to trickle into the clearing and claiming tents. Hector sat on an overturned crate next to his tent, watching the people…and wondering.

Over the next few days he got a better idea of where he was. The Soul Society was like a big ring, with districts coming out from one central hub, the Seireitei. They were in the twenty-fifth ring out, in the middle-class area. Fiona explained that he was lucky to end up here instead of out in the fortieth, fiftieth, or even sixtieth district. The father you got out, the worse it got. The people, that is. Their mannerisms, their lifestyle, their…humanity.

She didn't dwell on that, and Hector didn't ask further. He wasn't sure he wanted to know.

Otherwise, it was a very busy time. Many of the older men spent their time at the large pond about a mile west of the clearing, fly fishing for koi. Hector joined them. Soon he had perfected the art of tying the tiny, colorful fly to the line and jerking it quickly over the surface of the water, luring the little fish to the surface for what they thought would be a tasty treat. Then they would bag the koi in plastic bags and prepare them for prizes for the festival.

At night, Hector would join the children and teenagers of the town in the community hall, taking masks and decorating them for the visitors of the festival. They painted bold strips of color on black and white animal faces, adding feathers and sparkly mica chips. Kirito-kun's family's tent was right at the entrance to the festival, and they would be handing them out to the entering visitors.

On the morning of the festival, Hector woke early, before anyone else had risen. He dressed quickly and silently, and slipped through the front door of the hut. Walking quietly down to the lake, he sat down in the dewy grass, leaning back on his hands, and stared out across the still water.

It was only his fourth day here, but he had no memory of his life before, and to him the four days felt like an entire lifetime. He looked down at the grass, picking one single green blade and folding it longwise. When he put it in his mouth and blew, a high-pitched noise issued from it. He sighed a dropped the grass, his eyes returning to the lake before him.

He wondered if somewhere, out there, someone was missing him. Then his great green eyes slid shut.

He wasn't kidding anyone. No one was looking for him. He might as well give up on finding his old life.

* * *

"Ne, Emo-kun there sure are a lot of people here!"

Josef was sitting next to Hector on a crate in their tent. His mother had asked him to work for just an hour before he would be allowed to go and play. He only had about twenty minutes left of his shift, and the boy was bouncing excitedly in his seat as he watched all the people walking past.

Hector watched as well, agreeing distantly with the dark boy beside him. Men and women wearing both traditional dress and rough tunics were spilling into the festival. He could see a lot of people that looked like they came from wealth, which surprised him as he wasn't expecting it. He himself was dressed in a cotton tunic, dark blue with lighter blue trim and leaves of the same shade blustering about his waist. The neckline was a low V that revealed his circular scar and the point of the strange 4 tattoo.

Light was fading fast and as he watched, the bright, colorful lights and lanterns that were strung from lines across the tents began to light up. Slowly the blue sky melted away and was replaced by brilliant orange and pink hues as the sun lit up the clouds from behind.

At last Josef sprung from his seat, and after a gesture from Fiona, Hector followed. Josef went straight for the ring toss, Hector close behind. The back wall was covered with fluffy animals someone had gotten from a higher district, and there was a single wooden pole sticking straight out from the mess.

A teenager he recognized from the village as Rin was standing at the booth, and he grinned at them. "Hey, Josef-kun, Hector-kun. Would you like to have a go?"

"Yeah!" Josef exclaimed. He took the plastic ring from Rin's hand and then looked at him. "Do I just…"

"Yeah," Rin said. "Try to get the ring around the post."

Josef looked at the ring, looked at the post, and stuck out his tongue. He narrowed his eyes and threw the ring at the post.

It missed by a mile.

"It's all right, old chap," Rin says. He hands Josef another ring. "Wanna have another go?"

But Josef didn't make it that time either. Or the next time, or the next time. Finally, frustrated, he handed a ring to Hector. "It's rigged!" he complained, but Hector barely heard him. He held the ring in his hand, getting a feel for it. His eyes looked at the post. Observed it, the angle at which it stuck out from the wall, the motion it would take his arm to land squarely on the post itself.

Everything went quiet in his mind as he took aim and let fly. He blinked. The ring was hanging from the post like it belonged there.

Josef sputtered. "That was a fluke!" he wailed.

"Let me try again?" Hector asked Rin, who nodded graciously, though Hector could see that he was surprised as well. He passed Hector another ring, and he took aim once more, the world going quiet as he threw the wooden circle.

It slid in next to the first one.

Josef's jaw fell. Hector held out another hand, and Rin hastened to fill it. This throw made it, and so did the next one. Josef wandered away after a while, but Hector kept throwing the rings until Rin was out.

"You are really…good at that," Rin said, awe in his voice. Hector hadn't missed once.

"Thank you," Hector said stiffly. He turned to go, but Rin stopped him.

"Wait! You need to get your prize!" he exclaimed, and the next thing Hector knew, his face was full of stuffed animal. He grunted and attempted to rearrange them so that he could see. Glaring at Rin, he staggered across the clearing, where Josef was waving a koi prize in the face of his mother and two other young women.

"Josef-san. What do I do with all this?" Hector asked, trying to balance all the animals in his arms. One tumbled to the ground, but he barely noticed. Because standing in front of him was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen in his life.

She had hair that was as blazing bright as the sunset above them, tied back in braids and pinned with two blue flower clips. Her eyes were wide, so wide, and as beautiful as molten silver. Her face was glowing, blushing, blossoming, an Amaterasu mask perched on the crown of her forehead. Her body was framed by a simple, yet lovely green dress that went with her hair fabulously. Her two pink lips –so perfectly shaped –formed an 'o' as she gazed at him. They made eye contact for just a second, though it seemed to stretch on forever.

Fiona let out a small 'oh' and took several of the stuffed animals out of his hands, though he barely noticed. "Hector-san, how did you get all of these?" she said in a motherly tone. Hector snapped back to Earth, hearing her address him.

"I won them…actually," he mumbled. Finally he broke eye contact with that beautiful girl, staring at the ground. "It seems like I have an innate accuracy."

He glanced back up at her from underneath, his eyes uncertain. Her lips formed four syllables, almost silently, but he heard it.

"Ul…quiorra?"

Then, louder. "Ulquiorra? Ulquiorra!"

The stuffed animals were knocked from his arms as she threw her arms around his neck. He instantly stiffened, surprised at her unexpected affection, as she began to cry loudly into his blue yukata.

"Oh…I missed you," she sobbed. "But I found you, I finally…finally…found you."

He began to turn his head, to look at Fiona and Josef, and gage their reactions, but then he caught her scent.

The smell of pine trees and early morning waterfalls and viridian and hibiscus.

And then Ulquiorra's arms wrapped around Orihime so tightly. Everything came back – Aizen and the Espada, Kurosaki Ichigo, Grimmjow and Tia, Anónimo, Emiko and Daisuke – and Orihime Inoue, his lover, in his arms once more, where she belonged.

"Orihime," he murmured, and she looked at him, her face wet and shining. And he leaned down, under those lanterns and the surprised faces of everyone nearby, and pressed his lips to hers, closing his eyes with the sweetness and loneliness he tasted there.

Finally, he was home.

* * *

They wandered together down to the lake, sitting side by side in the grass. They didn't talk much, content to just be touching, just to be next to each other after so long.

Five months, she said. That's how long she had been looking. Ulquiorra acknowledged this with little surprise. His internal organs could, after all, regenerate, just not at a super-fast speed. When Orihime had pierced him with the zanpakuto, his being had come to Soul Society to reform.

Personally, he didn't much care, as long as he was with her.

She explained the outcome of the war. Grimmjow, she said, had not been seen since his fight with Ichigo. Neither had Nel. Tia was the only Espada she knew of that had survived. In defeating Aizen, Kurosaki had lost his powers, and as a consequence, was in a comatose state like sleep, which everyone was confident he would emerge from sooner rather than later.

Personally, he didn't much care, as long as he was with her.

He silenced her with a kiss. How he'd missed her. Not even knowing what you're missing is worse than knowing, because you are filled with an ache that cannot possibly be filled unless you stumble on it by accident, which he had.

He knew he would count his blessings every day that he had.

But he wasn't thinking about the future. He was thinking about the now, the now with Orihime. Away from Aizen, away from Grimmjow and Nnoitra and all the other crazy fools at Las Noches. They were under the real, starry sky, free at last.

She squeezed his hand, and he looked at her. She smiled at him, and he allowed the corners of his mouth to slide up gently in turn.

When he thought about it, it wasn't just her cheeks. It wasn't only her hair, not simply her eyes, nor even solely her lips. It was all of her, piece by piece, put together to make this fantastic creature before him.

And he'd be damned if he let his Onna slip through his fingers again.

* * *

**A**uthor's Note: WOW. Finally we made it to the end of the story.. What a great journey. Actually, we ended up doing a great job updating this until November, when we both went on hiatus (and are still struggling to get back into it, even 6 months later). But a year went by and some on you even stuck it out until the end, and for that you have my gratitude.

As for Moony...Girl what a helluva year. I had a great time writing with you! I would definitely want to collab again, sometime SOON! We should keep talking... I know I'll miss you if we don't :')

And to the readers: Thank you all so much. I really appreciate all of your patience with this story. I hope you enjoyed the final outcome :)

Love, TheCatWithTheHat


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